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Jimmy Kimmel

James Christian "Jimmy" Kimmel (born November 13, 1967) is an American comedian, voice actor, actor, screenwriter, producer, musician, television host, and radio personality.

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If anyone in this theater commits an act of violence at any point during this show you will be awarded the Oscar for best actor and permitted to give a 19-minute-long speech.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 1 year ago

People said I stole your moment, and maybe I did, and I'm very sorry if I did do that. I'm sorry I did do that, actually. And also the last thing I would ever want to do is upset you because I think so much of you. I think you know that. I hope you know that.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 2 years ago

Last night we announced that our President, President Joe Biden, would be stopping by, he will be here, which is nice, because it gives the gang at Fox News something to scream about all week.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 2 years ago

Here we are again, on another day of mourning in this country, once again, we grieve for the little boys and girls whose lives have been ended and whose families have been destroyed.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 2 years ago

This is a time to be loud — and to stay loud — and not stop until we fix this, some people say this is a mental health problem. Others say it's a gun problem. It is both, and it can be both. So let's work on both of those.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 2 years ago

They're listening to the NRA, they're listening to the people who write them checks, who keep them in power because that's the way politics work. That's the idea we settle on, that's what we tell ourselves, but it doesn't have to be that way. Not for this.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 2 years ago

While our leaders on the right — the Americans in Congress and at Fox News and these other outlets — warn us not to politicize this. They immediately criticize our President for even speaking about doing something to stop it, because they don't want to speak about it. Because they know what they've done and they know what they haven't done, and they know that it's indefensible. So they'd rather sweep this under the rug.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 2 years ago

Some of them were just funny and some were very serious emails about life and the wellbeing of our children and how hard it is to appreciate one of those without the other being just right.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on FOX News 2 years ago

After you won the game, do you remember what I did? I said ‘good game, thanks’ and I shook your disgusting hand, i didn’t complain that it was rigged, I didn’t ask for a recount on the referee, I didn’t start a conspiracy theory about the basketball having a microchip in it. I brought shame on my family and I embraced it as I always do.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on FOX News 3 years ago

MEGHAN MARKLE, PRINCE HARRY JOINING SELENA GOMEZ-LED CONCERT TO PROMOTE CORONAVIRUS VACCINE AWARENESS Sources told us that Jimmy Kimmel told Ben Affleck :.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on FOX News 3 years ago

I worry about you. I feel like you are maybe self-destructive, i feel like you're going to be out dressed as Spider-Man on Hollywood Boulevard at the end of this whole thing.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 3 years ago

This was not the sort of thing I ever imagined would happen in this country in my lifetime, the President of the United States, because Donald Trump is too angry, too insecure and too incompetent to deal with the fact that Donald Trump lost an election — a fair election, an election that was no different than any other election, an election Donald Trump lost by seven million votes, and 70 electors — turns an angry mob against members of Congress and his own vice president.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 3 years ago

And we will give him time.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 4 years ago

Unbelievable, lisa Kudrow, you live there too?

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on FOX News 4 years ago

Me and my n----- down in LBC, well smoke that motherf------ Christmas tree.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on FOX News 4 years ago

His response is even worse what the hell.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on FOX News 4 years ago

I don't know where we will do this or how we will do this or even why we are doing this, but we are doing it and I am hosting it.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 4 years ago

I had little choice but to say yes.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 4 years ago

Kobe Bryant was so big, it was almost like Kobe Bryant was Kobe Bryant, kobe Bryant was a real-life superhero with a costume and everything, walking amongst us.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 4 years ago

The Tonight Show is going to be different from our usual show, we don't have a studio audience here tonight because going forward with a comedy show didn't feel right considering what happened yesterday. So I'd like to just speak to you directly.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 4 years ago

Kobe Bryant came to L.A. when Kobe Bryant was Kobe Bryant and unlike almost every other superstar athlete, he never left, in Kobe Bryant 20-year career Kobe Bryant only wore two uniforms, for the Lakers and for the United States Olympic team.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 4 years ago

My intention is not to canonize Kobe Bryant or make judgments about things I don't know anything about, but I will say Kobe Bryant loved Kobe Bryant family, Kobe Bryant worked very hard, and Kobe Bryant brought a lot of joy to a lot of people in this city and we're going to miss Kobe Bryant.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 4 years ago

The Tonight Show's almost like you and President Obama left the door to the White House open and a bear got in.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

The rest of the week I'm a glutton — pizza and pasta and steak.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

Congratulations to our new fellow America citizens ! welcome to this country.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

This is a very strange time in a America, our President is building walls and telling people to go back where they came from. With all that happening it's important to remember that many people still dream of becoming Americans. Every week immigrants from all around the world take the oath of citizenship.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

You watch the news all day, you see what's going on, how do you walk on stage and ignore it ? It just doesn't work anymore, i wish I could. It's hard for me to talk about serious subjects. It takes a lot out of me. I do want to be funny. That's fun. It's not fun doing anything like that.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

It's horrible, nobody's doing anything about it at all and we seem to forget about these tragedies nationally four days after they happen.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

I think that they want to know what you think in the same way that when you interact with your friends they want to know what they think about things, i wish we didn't have to do it so frequently.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

My hope, always, in situations like that, is... I know I don't have any thoughts that are new or groundbreaking and usually by the time we get on the air there's been 24 to 48 hours of news coverage, but to just remind people that 97 % of Americans believe that we should have background checks for purchases at gun shows and our politicians don't seem to care what we think anymore.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

I wish I could. It's hard for me to talk about serious subjects. It takes a lot out of me. I do want to be funny. That's fun. It's not fun doing anything like that.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

It's weird they don't have a better process for thinning the herd, have 30 years of reality TV taught the Democrats nothing ? You can't go from 20 candidates right to one. First you have to put them on an island and separate them into tribes.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

You know, I was trying to lighten the mood.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

The fact that a group of Oscar winners eagerly agreed to play these iconic characters is a testament to the greatness of these shows and their creator, Norman Lear, to be a part of this is a dream come true for me and for everyone involved.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

I haven't been this confused about an ending since the series finale of' Lost,'.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

I think Donald Trump said that about Donald Trump taxes, too, so we'll see.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 5 years ago

He handed what turned out to be an Oscar-caliber role over to his friend and made a Chinese ponytail movie instead, and that movie,' The Great Wall,' went on to lose 80 million dollars. Smooth move, dumba **.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 6 years ago

I'm just waiting for the right person, the right heart, i just hold a lot of value into it.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 6 years ago

And then I was hit with the let's go to commercial break, that interview showed strong personalities with different opinions having a civil conversation.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 6 years ago

I mean, you've so famously and so powerfully said George( W.) Bush doesn't care about black people, it makes me wonder, what makes you think that President Donald Trump does... or any people at all ?

– Jimmy Kimmel

Found on CNN 6 years ago

I would rather we had a chimpanzee as president of the United States. At least with a chimp there would be somebody to eat the bugs out of Rudy Giuliani’s hair.

– Jimmy Kimmel