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RJ Intindola

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There are seven things you can never get back. 1. Words after they have been spoken. 2. A stone after it has been thrown. 3. A moment or occasion after it has passed. 4. A person after they have passed. 5. Time once it has passed. 6. Betrayal after it has transpired. 7. A lie after it has been spoken.

– RJ Intindola

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Don’t ever let yourself become a fool to your loyalty.

– RJ Intindola

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Some people settle for what they’re given instead of working hard for what they want.

– RJ Intindola

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He who wears the emotional and physical scars of life should do so with honor and integrity.

– RJ Intindola

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Your legacy among family and friends shall resemble a blank page while you remain silent when others threaten our constitutional values.

– RJ Intindola

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Only wisdom can teach us when it’s best to say nothing.

– RJ Intindola

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Your presence has no meaning when your absence doesn’t alter their life.

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If you want to boost your confidence, do something even though you’re scared.

– RJ Intindola

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This expression was created and expanded over numerous years. And possibly it will continue to be expanded. You will notice that the Internet has altered how the expression is written. I Wrote the first two lines in 1974. There are two experiences that you can never get back. First, words after they had been uttered. And second, a stone after it has been thrown. 1974 I added a third experience in 1980 after personal dramatic circumstances in my life. As a result, the expression was changed as written below. There are three experiences that you can never get back. One, words after they have been spoken. Two, a stone after it has been thrown. Three, a moment or after it has passed In January 1984, my father died, and I added a fourth item. which was stated in a different manner to my brother. Later that same year, I added a fifth experience, related to my brother who had cancer. Remember to spend time with those you love. There are five experiences that you can never get back. One, words after they have been spoken. Two, a stone after it has been thrown. Three, a moment or occasion after it has passed. Four, a person after they have passed. Five, time once it has passed. The final two experiences were added twelve years later in 1996. They are rarely included in the various depictions I have seen on the Internet. The only logic I can conclude for their lack of inclusion, is that I stopped posting to inspirational and poetic websites for several years.. Thus, the final or I should say current construction is noted below. There are seven things you can never get back. 1. Words after they have been spoken. 2. A stone after it has been thrown. 3. A moment or occasion after it has passed. 4. A person after they have passed. 5. Time once it has passed. 6. Betrayal after it has transpired. 7. A lie after it has been spoken. RJ Intindola ―

– RJ Intindola

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She was daydreaming out the kitchen window into the backyard. And wondered what it would feel like being naked on the swing. That night, with everyone in bed, she removed her nightgown and walked across the backyard to the swing. She felt exhilaration because she wasn’t supposed to be there.

– RJ Intindola

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Life without a plan is a life without expectations.

– RJ Intindola

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The best captains endure the most turbulence and greatest storms.

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When you continually must question the love you have, you need to start looking for the love you want.

– RJ Intindola

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When someone is not present to defend themselves don’t participate in a smearing campaign because you give credence to their cowardly actions.

– RJ Intindola

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Do not humiliate, disrespect or embarrass; always speak with a soft tongue when holding your ground. To be loud, rude and obnoxious will negate the argument and advantage. And truth is always mandatory.

– RJ intindola

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Fake people can be silenced with truth.

– RJ Intindola

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Intuition is like a compass that guides your decision-making process when answers are not readily available.

– RJ Intindola

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Relationships sometimes break like a falling vase into fifty pieces. And when you glue the vase back together, you realize it has lost the luster and pristine appearance that will never return. Now you have two choices. Keep it as it is or throw it away.

– RJ Intindola

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When struggling through a relationship crisis, every other aspect of your life becomes a battle.

– RJ Intindola

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Your morality is determined by your conscience and mine is determined by my conscience.

– RJ Intindola

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People who don’t keep promises, can’t be trusted.

– RJ Intindola

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Avoid constantly trying to adapt to situations, people, and other circumstances that have no value to your future. The phenomenon of always attempting to please and alter behavior is more likely to be unsuccessful then to enhance your life. Adapt by continuing to learn and improve your knowledge

– RJ Intindola

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Be careful not to fall in love with the fantasy you imagined instead of what’s standing before you.

– RJ Intindola

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Courageous people begin the journey knowing only the destination.

– RJ Intindola

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For the most part, people live their normal lives. Except when at parties, in a group or away from home, then a different person emerges.

– RJ Intindola

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No one is coming to save you. You’re the only one left for this assignment.

– RJ Intindola

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Progress does not come from following the norms, but instead by breaking them. What is normal remains the same and therefore we must depart from the past.

– RJ Intindola

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She taught me that without trust, love could never exist.

– RJ Intindola

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Silence is often the ultimate and most evident lie.

– RJ Intindola

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The fear of failure has killed many of hopes and dreams.

– RJ Intindola

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Action and malice that contradicts the conscience will result in irreparable damage and pain that could linger for years.

– RJ Intindola

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Disassociate with people that criticize you. Avoid them at all costs and act indifferent in their presence. At some point they may ask you what’s wrong, and you need to speak the truth.

– RJ Intindola

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Growth is a perpetual process that continues throughout our lives. And challenging ourselves is the foundation upon which growth is enhanced.

– RJ Intindola

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I evaluate friendship based on never uttering secret words I’ve spoken.

– RJ Intindola

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You may continue to stay together after betrayal, and the scar may heal and condense, but will never totally disappeared.

– RJ Intindola

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There are two types of scars; those that are visible and those that are not. Both indicate that you been hurt but only the external scars will show if you been healed. No one can see the scars inside us or if our injury still lingers.

– RJ Intindola

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Leaders typically don’t follow the crowd, that is unless they’re trying to escape a burning building.

– RJ Intindola

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When I hear a certain song playing in the background, I think of you and a vision of your face, pervades my soul. When the second song plays, your sweet fragrance fills the air around me. The third song and her gentle hand caressing my face tingles my body covered with goosebumps. At the fourth song, I gently glide to the radio and turn it off. There’s no sense roaming in the darkened marred past.

– RJ Intindola

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Being a great leader requires several attributes. Leadership includes both rewarding and difficult attributes. You must possess the strength to make tough decisions that may isolate you for a period. And yet, have empathy and understanding of others. You must be able to listen to alternatives regarding your decisions and seriously consider them. If you practice from both a standpoint of strength and compassion, people may not always agree with your decisions, but they will respect you.

– RJ Intindola

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Every so often deliberately participate in inappropriate behavior, but don’t tell anyone. In this way, your public persona shall remain intact.

– RJ Intindola

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No one can penetrate silence; they can only interpret what is said. However, silence will create an abundance of speculative suppositions.

– RJ Intindola

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Moments when you realize your heart is empty and the one who could fill it, never will.

– RJ Intindola

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When someone has broken the trust you bestowed in them, their likely to do it again. Be wary before speaking in front of them on any matter you don’t want to be repeated.

– RJ Intindola

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If you love freedom, then you’re going to have to pay for it. Not only by paying taxes but by making the commitment to live by the principles that is essential for freedom to survive. That includes respecting the rule of law and if you have set that aside for political reasons, then you are a threat to our democracy and our freedoms.

– RJ Intindola

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My Broken Pieces A few weeks back, a longtime friend asked if I would meet her for lunch to discuss a new job offer. We sat in the restaurant for forty-five minutes discussing her new job opportunity when her face grew solemn. She sighed, staring down into her plate. I asked, “is everything all right,” knowing she did not ask me to meet to discuss a job offer. She said, “everything is fine, but I cannot get your story or quote about the broken pieces out of my mind.” She took a deep breath raised her head and, in half whisper, said, “it really described the broken pieces in my marriage? I answered, “when promises, borders and commitment are broken, and especially betrayal, the relationship may be repaired but never return to what it once was or could have been.” Before she left, she thanked me for giving her a copy. I refer to the story, as “The Broken Vase.” The Broken Vase Love and marriage are often broken by betrayal, lies and unkept promises. Betrayal is the ultimate form of deceit and deception. It reminded me of something I wrote many years ago about a vase that was knocked off the shelf and broken into many pieces. For a moment you’re not sure what to do but then you decide to try and repair it. Imagine trying to pick up the pieces of your life, left behind in the wake of betrayal. You must be methodical and cautious because your path is covered with egg shells. You realize it may not be the same as it once was, but would vase be good enough to keep. After all, you’ve had it for thirty years. When you believe all the pieces have been collected and placed on the table, you do one last search for the smallest pieces you may have missed. You find two small pieces, place them on the table and stare down at the broken pieces of something you cherished and was beautiful. Something so precious you often proudly displayed it to friends Over a period of three weeks, you managed to glue the vase back together. You slowly turn it around on the table and realize it is an archaic reproduction of its original form. There are holes in it created by pieces you did not find and never will. Like the pieces missing from your relationship. Held together by history and commitment but still broken. And severely damaged. The vase will never hold flowers again because it cannot hold water. And like your relationship, it has become fragile as you watch a piece fall off the vase when you lifted off the table. And when you think about the broken pieces collected from your relationship, you know that will also never be the same. As you held up the beautiful vase to show people it’s beauty, that now is simply a collection of glued pieces that resembles your relationship. You can no longer showcase your marriage. Only because of its history you place the vase back on the self, but it seems out of place and detracts from the ambience around it. After a few weeks you take the vase to your home office and place it on a shelf. A few weeks later, you sadly change the location to the closet. And like your relationship it has been moved to a different place. A dark place. When people say to you, you and your wife seem to get along very well. You think about showing them the vase. All that remains of the relationship is held together by glue. After several years you are still seeking out the missing pieces from your heart knowing deep inside you will never find. There’s only one way to get them back and that is to leave. But leaving will also mean breaking more pieces. Those are your two choices. If you leave, you will get back some of the pieces you lost but you would lose others by virtue of leaving.

– RJ Intindola

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Love is often described as a fruit you can just reach out with your hand and pluck. However, one should beware, that although glowing in color, the fruit is often tainted or rotten.

– RJ Intindola

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Quit telling us to forget the past and never look back. We learned from the past, gained wisdom from the past that we apply every day in the process of living. If we forget the past, we’ll forget who we are since that’s where we came from.

– RJ Intindola

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Each time our heart is broken, we should learn a lesson and not repeat the same mistakes. However, often there is nothing we could have done to save the relationship.

– RJ Intindola

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If we do not have justice for the rule of law, then society shall be broken.

– RJ Intindola

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People who create change, change the future for others. Therefore, if you remain idle, the future will control how you change.

– RJ Intindola

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When today is no different than yesterday and you haven’t taken any action to improve your tomorrow, then all your days continue to be yesterdays

– RJ Intindola

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When you have a choice between quantity or quality, always choose quality; except when it comes to money.

– RJ Intindola

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The past is behind you and there is nothing you can do to change it. However, you are in total control of your future.

– RJ Intindola

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When beset with doubt in troubled times, and those about you will understand if you come unglued, stay the ground and face the challenge. Fore when you stand alone to confront life's highest mountains, the next shall be easier to climb.

– RJ Intindola

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People would lie less if they could only remember how difficult it is to live with the lie. There is one exception – narcissistic people live in a lie and therefore have no conscious of guilt regarding the consequences of their dishonest demeanor.

– RJ Intindola

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Sometimes defining friendship can be simple. If your heart still aches after someone has passed, then you were a true friend. They may have physically left this world, but they still walk among us in our hearts.

– RJ Intindola

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Sometimes our heart goes rogue and makes decisions without even telling us or letting us know in advance.

– RJ Intindola

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We’ve all had that feeling after final exams were completed, and we whispered to ourselves, “thank God it’s over.” It’s not over as you will learn in life you must keep moving forward to succeed. And if you don’t, guess what; it’s over.

– RJ Intindola

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While you can see the beauty in almost everything; there are others that see nothing but ugliness in the world. They disparage everything and one must wonder, do they find pleasure in condemnation.

– RJ Intindola

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If your life were a movie, would you pay to watch it?

– RJ Intindola

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Seduction is a magical art form that women use to conquer men.

– RJ Intindola

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What I’ve learned is not to pay much attention to those that say, “Money will not make you happy.” To them, I answer, it’s certainly a good place to start. And not having it can make you sad.

– RJ Intindola

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When in love, the heart will deflect any sense of reasoning offered by the brain.

– RJ Intindola

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Don’t be afraid to burn a bridge you never want to cross again.

– RJ Intindola

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Some friends are more significant and important than other friends. A special friend can often change your life for the better. You will know when this special person enters your life because of the respect you have for them. They will never lie or set you aside for someone or something else. You will have undying trust in this person that any words spoken will never find another ear. They always returned calls at the earliest possible time. They will check in often to see what’s going on in your life and just talk. Your accomplishments will be applauded with praise and losses will never be repeated. This friend has you melted within their heart as you do theirs. When you find such a person be sure to return the love and understand they have gifted you and your life.

– RJ Intindola

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If you're alone, I'll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I'll be your pillow. If you feel pain, I’ll be your aspirin. If you are unhappy, I'll be your smile. If you are ill, I’ll be your prescription. But anytime you need a friend, I'll just be me.

– RJ Intindola

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No one has gone through life without acquiring scars and bruises. These wounds are hidden inside us and only we can feel. They are badges of our day-to-day struggle to learn and survive.

– RJ Intindola

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Hate is easy. Kind is a mindset.

– RJ Intindola

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Every human being on earth has two things in common. Death and a broken heart.

– RJ Intindola

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If you’re the problem, then moving to a new town to start a new life is not going to work.

– RJ Intindola

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Small minded people rarely have any ideas, just a litany of complaints.

– RJ Intindola

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True friendship is like the sun that you can't always see in the darkness of night, but you know will return to brighten your day.

– RJ Intindola

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Love is friendship set in a blaze of fire.

– RJ Intindola

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Fate controls who walks into your life, but you decide who leaves, stays, and who you refuse to let go. Who stays depends on the bindings between you.

– RJ Intindola

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Beauty is seen through the eyes, but beautiful people are only known through your heart.

– RJ Intindola

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I must admit that I am always perplexed when reading quotes and other writings that true love should be unconditional. Well, how about betrayal? Shouldn’t that be a condition? It is for me and should be for you.

– RJ Intindola

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The silence of many is deafening. Especially when our country is under attack by those who challenge the moral values of our Constitution.

– RJ Intindola

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Trust me, the harder you work the better luck you have.

– RJ Intindola

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When I felt cornered in my life and wrought with crisis and turmoil, I wondered why friends stayed silent.

– RJ Intindola

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Don’t wait until regrets are your only option, make the changes and act before it’s too late.

– RJ Intindola

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I’ve created a new morality. Not one based on societal values and mores but instead on my own conscience. We should not let others determine our moral values nor accept their ridicule. Full stop.

– RJ Intindola

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If you give your word to someone, keep it.

– RJ Intindola

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Be the person people remember because you made them feel special.

– RJ Intindola

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Stare your fears down and they will eventually disappear.

– RJ Intindola

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The pursuit of happiness is a lifelong struggle.

– RJ Intindola

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You can always tell the character of a person, by what they say about others who are not present.

– RJ Intindola

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A wise man listens to gain knowledge and not to debate.

– RJ Intindola

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Some doors slammed in your face need to be glued and nailed shut so they can never be reopened.

– RJ Intindola

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People that are hiding something deep within themselves, will live a life cloaked in total anxiety.

– RJ Intindola

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In the epic battle between the brain and the heart, the heart usually wins.

– RJ Intindola

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We gain knowledge by going through life, education, reading and other learning techniques. And with this knowledge we are now able to imagine.

– RJ Intindola

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Only love can turn the darkest storm into the brightest day.

– RJ Intindola

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We tend to remember our mistakes more than other actions because they leave us feeling uncomfortable. And because we don’t like feeling that way, we are less likely to repeat our mistakes. The same can also be said for taking chances and putting aside our fears.

– RJ Intindola

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Beware of people that envy you.

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Before deciding on a decision, determine how well you are willing to live with it.

– RJ Intindola

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In sports, it is easier to win a championship than to remain a champion in subsequent seasons. And the same is true in life. Once you reach the top, it is more difficult to stay on top. Because, when you become the best in sports, and in life, everyone expects more from you and they want to take you down.

– RJ Intindola

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Everybody loves and desires success, but they dislike and are envious of successful people.

– RJ Intindola

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If you think it can’t be done, please don’t interfere or interrupt the rest of us trying to do it.

– RJ Intindola

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The only reason that evil exists is to challenge the good among us to defeated it.

– RJ Intindola

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When someone does not respond, not responding is their response.

– RJ Intindola

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A wise man waits until everyone else has spoken.

– RJ Intindola

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Never and Always Never take advantage of someone who loves you Never avoid someone who needs you Never betray anyone who has trust in you Never forget the people that always remember you Never speak ill of a person who is not present Never support something you know is wrong or unethical Always speak to your parents on their birthday and anniversary Always defend those who cannot defend themselves Always forgive those you love who have made mistakes Always give something to those less fortunate than you Always remember to look back at those who helped you succeed Always call your parents and siblings on New Year’s Eve. R.J. Intindola- 1985

– RJ Intindola

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When a friend is going through a difficult stormy time in their life, try to be the rainbow that makes them smile.

– RJ Intindola

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If someone makes a mistake and you still want them in your life, then forgive them.

– RJ Intindola

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Life is a test, make sure you study for it.

– RJ Intindola

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How many times have we encountered a person that states, “can I ask a question,” and proceeds to ask the question before you can respond. In these cases, they’ve given us a choice and then take it away. What they’re really doing here, is making a statement and not asking you to decide.

– RJ Intindola

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When you succeed everybody wants to party with you. When you fail, just buy a bottle of scotch to take home.

– RJ Intindola

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No one lives out the words they preach or the advice they offer. This does not mean they don’t believe in the words they’ve written or spoken but instead are subject to life’s necessary standard deviations.

– RJ INtindola

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Our moral code is constantly evolving; it’s impacted by the betrayers, masters of deceit, and the pseudo-truth tellers among us, even those we love.

– RJ Intindola

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Friendship is rooted in the protection of deep dark secrets.

– RJ Intindola

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If you ask for advice, listen, instead of interrupting and debating why it’s wrong.

– RJ Intindola

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She awakened your soul, but the soft whispers of wisdom led elsewhere. The perfect love, a true connection at a time not willing to wait.

– RJ Intindola

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No one has gone through life without acquiring scars and bruises. Some wounds are hidden inside us and only we can feel. They are badges of our day-to-day struggle to learn and survive. RJ Intindola – 1981

– RJ Intindola

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People that complain often are usually trying to get attention. The stems from the fact they’re displeased with their accomplishments and think the lack of same is the fault of others.

– RJ Intindola

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