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It puts me in a position of somebody who is being proactive about their life. One who is acting in defense of Jim Ambrose and others, to couch it that way informs the listener -- often a potential sexual partner -- that I care what you think, but I know enough about Jim Ambrose to know that if you want to perceive me as a victim, cry for me, be disgusted by me or get up and leave, you can do all of those things.