A Garfield Christmas Special

Jon Arbuckle:
Hey, Dad?

Doc Boy:
Hey, psst. Dad? You awake? DAD, YOU AWAKE?

Dad:
I am now. What do you buys want?

Jon Arbuckle:
Is it time to open our presents yet?

Dad:
It's 1:30 in the morning. No, it is not time to open presents yet.

Doc Boy:
It IS Christmas morning now, you know.

Jon Arbuckle:
Doc Boy has a point there, Dad. Any time after midnight is technically Christmas morning, you know.

Dad:
GO... TO BED!

Doc Boy:
All right. Pleasant dreams, DAD. It IS Christmas morning, you know.

Jon Arbuckle:
I know that and YOU know that.

Dad:
Well, what do you boys want to do first? Do you want to do chores? Do you want to eat breakfast? Or do you want to open presents?

Jon Arbuckle:

Garfield:
All right, you guys, just permit me one sentimental moment here. I have something to say: Christmas. It's not the giving, it's not the getting, it's the loving. There, I said it. Now get out of here.

Jon Arbuckle:
Garfield, I have a very important job for you. It's a dangerous job, but if you succeed, you'll be a hero. I want you to take this star up the tree and place it on the top.

Garfield:
Climbing trees is my life, Sir. If I'm not back in an hour, send a banana cream pie after me.

Garfield:
Whoever invented Christmas trees should be dragged out into the street and shot.

Garfield:
Never send a man to do a cat's job.

Mom:
And now, my little boy is going to favor us with a Christmas song.

Doc Boy:
I don't know about this, Mom.

Dad:
Boy, you doggone better well play. Those 24 years of py-ano lessons better be worth something.

Jon Arbuckle:
Doc Boy, my favorite brother.

Doc Boy:
Don't call me Doc Boy. And in case you've forgotten, I'm your ONLY brother.

Garfield:
Big fat hairy deal.

Garfield:
Hello,what's this? Why it's sausage gravy!

Garfield:
Perfect!

Doc Boy:
O Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree! How lovely are thy...

Grandma:
Scoot over, Sonny Boy. Let ol'Grandma take a whack at that!

Grandma:
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree! How lovely are thy branches! Woah-Boop-Bee-Doop-Bee-Doop-Bee-Doop!

Jon Arbuckle:
We're almost back on the farm now, boys. I can almost smell Mom's chesnut dressing baking in the oven right now.

Garfield:
That's not what I smell.

Jon Arbuckle:
Grandma, you remember Garfield, don't you?

Grandma:
Well I'll be. I remember back when all we had were wood-burning cats. What will they think of next?

Garfield:
Bizarre.

Mom:
Isn't this wonderful? The whole family together again for the holidays. We're going to have such a splendid Christmas. Oh, I'm so happy I could just burst.

Grandma:
Oh, put a sock in it, deary.

Nobody gives a sock about an old lady

You fix too much food, mum

I am fine, considering

Whoever made this should be dragged in the street and shot