American Pie Presents Beta House

Wesley:
[wakes up on plane] Excuse me, where's this plane going to?

Stewardess:
Detroit.

Wesley:
[sighs with relief] Thank God! [panics]... Excuse me! Where's it coming from?

Stewardess:
Bangkok.

Wesley:
Thai... [Wesley's sleeve is tugged by Sun Lei]

Wesley:
Whose kid is that?

Stewardess:
Yours - you adopted him yesterday. Congratulations!

Wesley:
[waves gingerly] Hey buddy.

Bobby:
You started it!

Mike 'Cooze' Coozeman:
What? I didn't do anything

Bobby:
You charged that stripper with a pen like you were gonna shove it in her ass!

Ashley:
How're you feeling?

Erik Stifler:
Hey. Good, thanks.

Ashley:
Here, let me see.

Erik Stifler:
Oh, no. No, no. Ashley, it's... You really don't need to do anything.

Ashley:
Oh my God, Erik. You have to put something on that.

Erik Stifler:
No, it's just a little red.

Ashley:
Here, let me. [Ashley takes some healing gel and starts rubbing it on Erick's burn]

Erik Stifler:
It's really not necessary... [Erik gasps]

Ashley:
Does it hurt?

Erik Stifler:
No, it's just really cold.

Ashley:
[Ashley rubs slower] Does that feel better?

Erik Stifler:
Yeah. Mmm-hmm.

Ashley:
Wow! [Megan is shocked by Erik's erection through the towel]

Erik Stifler:
Oh man!

Ashley:
I didn't even touch it. Mmm. No, it's no big deal. I guess I should just take it as a compliment, right?

Erik Stifler:
I'm sorry. Yeah. I'm sorry.

Ashley:
It's cool.

Erik Stifler:
How that cream feels good. Ash, you might wanna...

Ashley:
[Whispering] Just relax.

Erik Stifler:
[Panting] It's still hot. [John falls backward and his towel falls off, his semen squirts on the wall, a picture frame and a teddy bear]

Ashley:
Oh my God! Mr. Biggles!