Bates Motel

Norma Louise Bates:
Why do crazy people keep gravitating towards me?

Norma Louise Bates:
[repeated voice in Norman's head] Norman, you know what you have to do.

Norma Louise Bates:
Norman, no matter what, this'll become public. And it'll be in all the papers. Everyone in town will know about it. Who is going to book a room in the "rape-slash-murder" motel?

Norman Bates:
Mother, are you sure we shouldn't call for help?

Norma Louise Bates:
No one's ever going to help us, Norman. No one's ever helped us.

Deputy Zack Shelby:
[to Norma] I love you, you idiot!

Norman Bates:
It's just a dream, Dylan.

Dylan Massett:
You wouldn't want to actually hurt anybody though, would you?

Norman Bates:
Of course I wouldn't want to. I've never wanted to hurt anyone. Except you once in a while.

Norma Louise Bates:
When I moved here, no one prepared me for the colossal, frickin' face-dive off a cliff that living in this crazy town really is!

Norman Bates:
[to his mother] No matter where we go, things will always be the same, because you do things that don't make sense! You, you're crazy!

Dylan Massett:
You'll do anything to get your way!

Norma Louise Bates:
I've never gotten my way, and that includes being your mother!

Summer:
[gossiping in the girl's room] She would never have sex with someone like that.

Jenna:
Ugh, no way. She can't be that stupid.

Emma Decody:
[emerging from a stall] Well, maybe you better talk to her. Because she did.

Summer:
I don't think you know what we're talking about.

Emma Decody:
Actually, I don't think you know what you're talking about. Bradley had sex with Norman. Sex, as in carnal-back-and-forth. Maybe she has sex with all her pets, I don't know. But you should really get your facts straight before you shoot your mouth off with your demeaning opinions. And you've got toilet paper on your shoe...

Norman Bates:
Well, it's uh, it's just a piece of information. You know, it doesn't change anything. We're all still the same people we were yesterday.

Dylan Massett:
What total bullshit! What if you were given a piece of information about yourself? Something, something that totally changed the way you perceive yourself for the rest of your life?

Norman Bates:
I can't imagine anything like that, I guess.

Dylan Massett:
Well, maybe you should talk to mother about that.

Norman Bates:
What does that mean?

Dylan Massett:
It means what it means. Maybe we don't all know who we are. Maybe someone's been lying to you about an important event in your life that you have no consciousness of.

Dylan Massett:
There are things in life that have consequences, Norma. You're looking at one. I'm a consequence.

Norma Louise Bates:
No you're not. You're not a consequence. You need to be strong, you need to put this behind you.

Dylan Massett:
I can't put this behind me. It's me. How can I put me behind me?

Norma Louise Bates:
This is the part where you say, "Mother, this is beautiful. I am so happy we're moving here. You are so smart to have thought of this.""

Norman Bates:
Mother, this is so beautiful. I'm so happy you're making me move here. You're so smart to force me to do things I have no say in.

Norma Louise Bates:
You're an ass.

Norma Louise Bates:
Norman, this is our chance to start over.

Norman Bates:
Maybe some people don't get start to over. Maybe they just bring themselves to a new place.

Bradley Martin:
Them dumb b*tches leave you here by yourself?

Norman Bates:
No, it's fine. There's a lot to look at.

Bradley Martin:
Is that a line? You're different, aren't you?

Norman Bates:
I don't know. Maybe. I think people who are different don't know they're different because they have nothing to compare it to.

Bradley Martin:
Yeah, you're different.

Norman Bates:
What's so different about me?

Bradley Martin:
You're like... a beautiful, deep, still lake in the middle of a concrete world.

Norman Bates:
I am? That's kinda weird.

Bradley Martin:
You're kinda weird. Weird good.

Keith Summers:
[handcuffing her to the kitchen table] This house is mine. And everything in this house is mine.

[last lines]

Norma Louise Bates:
What's important is, we're together. And as long as we're together, nothing bad can really happen. Right, Norman?

Norman Bates:
Right, mother.

Norma Louise Bates:
I'm just a little concerned that you seem obsessed with, uh... morbidity or something. I mean, you spend your days equally mooning over a dead teacher and taking apart dead animals - it's just weird!

Norma Louise Bates:
[at City Council meeting] Welcome to the world ladies! There are ax murderers and whores stuffed under every rug, so your kids better read up on it and get educated, because that's what life is! It's a cesspool you claw and scratch and fight to swim out of, but you never get to the top!

[last lines]

Bradley Martin:
[waking him] Did you mean what you said. That you'd always be there for me?

Norman Bates:
[yes]

Bradley Martin:
Good. Because I need your help.

Norma Louise Bates:
[about Dylan] We don't really talk, we had a falling out.

Nick Ford:
Then for no other reason, you need to see him and fix that. I lost a daughter; I was estranged from her when it happened. I can tell it's the most horrible thing that ever happened to me. Talk to your son. Do it while you can. Do it right away.

Dylan Massett:
Here I am, talk.

Nick Ford:
For future reference, Dylan, in business, as in life in general, pleasantries are an important part of how people communicate. It helps to define common ground.

Dylan Massett:
I don't need you passing judgement on me or on anything I do, okay. I'm 22 years old, I'm an adult.

Norma Louise Bates:
Yeah, barely. [shoots again at the targets]

Dylan Massett:
Who's not the adult? I'm trying to teach you how to use a firearm, and you're doing whatever the hell you want.

Norma Louise Bates:
You called me mom.

Dylan Massett:
What?

Norma Louise Bates:
Yeah. You haven't done that in like, I don't know how long.

Dylan Massett:
Yeah, well you have a loaded gun in your hands, Norma.

Miss Watson:
What happened to your eye?

Norman Bates:
Oh, I got in a fight.

Miss Watson:
What?

Norman Bates:
Well, actually I got punched. The other guy was fine.

Norma Louise Bates:
Norman, you know what you have to do.

Norman Bates:
[sarcastically about Dylan's incoming caller banner] Apparently, "The Whore" is calling.

Dylan Massett:
[answering] Hi, Norma.

[first lines]

Norma Louise Bates:
[running to the doorbell] I'm coming!

Dylan Massett:
[the door opens] Hi,mom.

Norma Louise Bates:
I hate you. You have never had an ounce of kindness for me.

Dylan Massett:
Oh, oh, I'm sorry I was a little bit hard to get on the tea party with you, Norma.

Norma Louise Bates:
What are you talking about? What "tea party?" He likes me. He just likes me, so we are close. That is the normal arrangement between mothers and sons. Not this crap.

Dylan Massett:
[about Emma's oxygen] Do you think she has to take that thing out of her nose when they make-out?

Norma Louise Bates:
Parents do not have needs. You ever read the book "The Giving Tree"? It's about a tree, and this kid keeps coming and taking stuff from it his whole life, until there's nothing left but a stump. And then the kid sits on the stump. That's being a parent.

Norman Bates:
What can we do? How can we help?

Norma Louise Bates:
I'm glad you want to help, Norman. Really, it's big of you. Any mother would be broken in half by such devotion.

Dylan Massett:
She lives for the drama. She's like a addict, Norman. And when you have an addict in your life, the best thing you can do for them, and for yourself, is walk away.

Dylan Massett:
Do you live up here?

Jodi Wilson:
No, I'm taking you up here to kill you. [a straight face, then laughs]

Norma Louise Bates:
[about council member's death] It's so sad.

Nick Ford:
"It's sad." And convenient.

Norma Louise Bates:
Well, I would never say someone dying is convenient.

Nick Ford:
Well then you'd be lying. Or ignorant. There are many times, Norma, when death in convenient.

Dylan Massett:
If you're in charge, how come I never see you?

Jodi Wilson:
[running soil tests] I don't like to get my hands dirty.

Dylan Massett:
That's kind of funny. I mean, you really seem to like dirt.

Jodi Wilson:
I *do* like dirt. It's honest.

Max Borowitz:
I'm sorry I missed that last meeting when you called Lee Berman "a dick."

Norma Louise Bates:
Yeah, well uh, I'm a little embarrassed about all that now.

Max Borowitz:
Don't be, he was - God rest his soul.

Sheriff Alex Romero:
Jimmy Brennan, he grew up here, so I knew him for a long long time, and he was angry for pretty much all of it.

Zane Carpenter:
If you're gonna sleep with my sister, manage your expectations.

Dylan Massett:
I don't...

Zane Carpenter:
Yeah sure, I know. It's just, uh, it's not her first below her pay grade.

Cody Brennan:
My Aunt already cleaned out the guest room, she said. She has 5 cats, so her place probably smells like cat pee, instead of beer and smoke. Man, I can't wait until I'm 18 so I can pick the way my place smells.

Sheriff Alex Romero:
Now, your daughter didn't live a simple life.

Nick Ford:
I know *exactly* the kind of life my daughter lived. I know. You know, we all work together, Alex. We all try to respect each other, accommodate each other. And because of that, things in this little town are pretty nice. But it's not a given. It's not written on some stone tablet somewhere that that's the way it has to be.

Norma Louise Bates:
Norman.

Norman Bates:
What?

Norma Louise Bates:
Do you want to do a musical?

Cody Brennan:
[ringing up his groceries] You're doin' errands for your mom. Aren't you a dying breed.

Norman Bates:
Yeah. I guess we're all doing that, too.

Cody Brennan:
What?

Norman Bates:
Dying. I mean, once we're born, that's what we're doing, right?

Norma Louise Bates:
I just wanted to do something fun with you.

Norman Bates:
Mother, we live together, yeah? We work together. We eat every meal together. We sleep six inches away from each other, with a thin wall between us. Don't you think that's probably enough?

[last lines]

Mechanic:
Can I help you?

Caleb:
Yeah, I'm looking for a place called the Bates Motel.

Mechanic:
It's a few miles down the road. I was just there though, No Vacancy was on.

Caleb:
Yeah, well, I'm not looking for a room there. I was just trying to find my sister.

Mechanic:
Yeah? Who's your sister?

Caleb:
Norma Bates.

[first lines]

Norman Bates:
[blind folded] Why are you doing this to me, huh?

Norman Bates:
[being put into a box] You must have caught the wrong person. I go to high school!

Declan Rogers:
My reputation's killing me. It's only because I'm old and still at it.

Sheriff Alex Romero:
No, it's 'cause of the way you conduct a test. There's nobody better. You can always ferret-out the truth.

Declan Rogers:
No, I can't force anyone to reveal the truth. I can just you if they're lying.

Norman Bates:
[quoting dialog from Meet John Doe, 1941] "I'm gonna talk about us - the average guys, the John Does. If anybody should ask you what the average John Doe is like, you couldn't tell him because he's a million and one things. He's Mr. Big and Mr. Small. He's simple and he's wise. He's inherently honest but he's got a streak of larceny in his heart. He seldom walks up to a public telephone without shovin' his finger into the slot to see if somebody left a nickel there. He's the man that ads are written for. He's the fella everybody sells things to. He's..."

Norma Louise Bates:
What's wrong with these criminals that they cant just hang onto their own sh*t?

[first lines]

Cody Brennan:
Norman? Norman? Norman!

Norman Bates:
[wakes up sitting in her car]

Cody Brennan:
Hey, you're back.

Norman Bates:
[about Gunner] He sells pot, you know.

Emma Decody:
Yeah, I know.

Norman Bates:
Okay, okay.

Emma Decody:
I'm not marrying him, he's here for the summer, and he's nice.

Norman Bates:
I'm not marrying him, he's here for the summer, and he's nice.

Emma Decody:
Nobody's perfect.

Emma Decody:
What's it like the first time you have sex?

Norma Louise Bates:
[after a long pause and a sigh] Why?

Emma Decody:
[rambling] Well, there's someone that I met, and every time I'm with him that's pretty much all I'm thinking about. So it seems within the realm of possibility that it could happen. And, I mean, 'cause of my medical situation, I've never done it. And I don't have a mother to ask, or a close girl friend, and I can't exactly ask my dad. And I actually tried googling it, but what I read just scared me. I hope you don't mind that I asked you. I mean, you don't have to answer if you don't want to. It might be inappropriate.

Norma Louise Bates:
If you have feelings for him, and he's a good person, then the first time you have sex should be lovely. It should.

Emma Decody:
It should.

Norma Louise Bates:
There's girls like her, girls that have no future. They're just raised like a weed, that are just trapped in some unbearable circumstance that they can't get out of. And I'm just saying, that's the kind of girl that can get you into trouble. They talk you into things, get pregnant, the next thing you know, your life is over. I didn't make the world the way it is. There are people who can help you, and people who can hurt you, and you gotta pick the right people.

[last lines]

Jodi Wilson:
[visiting his hospital room] We're gonna take care of all this - expenses, get you back on your feet. I don't want you worrying about any of it, okay? I just wanted to meet the famous Dylan Massett.

Dylan Massett:
Who are you?

Jodi Wilson:
I'm your boss.

[first lines]

Dylan Massett:
Nick Ford's dead, I just killed him. He's got Norman, I don't know where.

Norman Bates:
[recalling a murder] It wasn't a hallucination, it was a memory. I could feel it! It happened! I can still feel it. I remember it the way you remember how gingerbread tasted at Christmas.

Dylan Massett:
Why are you giving me a free pass? Not that I don't appreciate it.

Sheriff Alex Romero:
Because I think you get it. I think you're smart enough to understand how things work around here - what you can do, what you can't do. And right now... right now there's a vacuum. Somebody's gonna fill that vacuum. That's as inevitable as the sun rising in the morning.

Declan Rogers:
In my opinion, Norman Bates did not kill Blaire Watson.

Norma Louise Bates:
We all go a little mad sometimes.

Dylan Massett:
I found him [Norman] in the basement with a dead pigeon.

Norma Louise Bates:
That's nothing new for Norman. There's always something dead in the basement,

Norma Louise Bates:
What is she like?

Emma Decody:
She's only the prettiest girl in the school. And the most popular. And she's nice, so you can't even hate her. She's like a locomotive of sexual energy.

Norma Louise Bates:
She's only a high school girl, she can't be that big a deal.

Bradley Martin:
It's just something that happened. I'm really sorry. I shouldn't have done it with someone... like you.

Norman Bates:
Someone like me. [walks away]

Norman Bates:
I promise you, mother, we *will* get him. He's a bad guy and we *will* get him. We just have to did it the right way.

Dylan Massett:
You're boyfriend, Norma, is quite the prize.

[last lines]

Dylan Massett:
[about Norman] What's wrong with him?

Norma Louise Bates:
I don't know. Maybe it was an isolated incident. All I know is he's innocent of it. He didn't know what he was doing, so he needs to be protected. So you can either get out of my way, or you can help me.

Norman Bates:
I told you to call the police the night it happened, I told you this was a bad idea! You had every right to defend yourself!

Norma Louise Bates:
But I didn't defend myself, I killed the crap outta him!

Will Decody:
Norman? I probably shouldn't be telling you this but my daughter has quite a crush on you. Now, you seem like a nice kid and I know you know she has a lot of, um... problems. She's not strong and she's very young. Just a regular girl in many ways. So please, be decent.

Norman Bates:
I am decent.

[Dylan sits on the porch smoking as his mother walks out of a motel room with her boyfriend a moment behind]

Dylan Massett:
Hello there, Norma. How are those new linens workin' out for you?

Norma Louise Bates:
Honey, sometimes you hear and see things that aren't there.

Norman Bates:
It's not true.

Norma Louise Bates:
It's true. I don't want you to worry but you've done this for a while. You know, it's like some kind of trance or something.

Norman Bates:
I don't trust him.

Norma Louise Bates:
Norman, you're just jealous, you're not used to me having someone.

Norman Bates:
I'm not jealous, you're my mother not my girlfriend!

Norman Bates:
Whatever.

Norma Louise Bates:
Did you just "whatever" me?

Bradley Martin:
There are only a few people I can stand to be around. You seem to get it. Don't touch me or push me to cheer up. You don't know what a relief that is.

Norman Bates:
I'm glad. I mean, that you can stand to be with me.

Bradley Martin:
Death is a weird thing, isn't it? It's like, someone is with you your whole life.They're breathing, present - and then they're just gone.

Norman Bates:
Totally gone?

Bradley Martin:
Vanished. Never even get to see them again.

Norman Bates:
Ever? Sucks.

Bradley Martin:
It's a really bad plan, whoever came up with it.

Norman Bates:
I think grief is just the period of time it takes for your brain to accept that someone's gone. Because everything in your body, your mind, your entire being, just keeps bringing back to the moment that they're still alive. It takes a long time for your body to let go of that.

Bradley Martin:
That's exactly what it is.

Norman Bates:
It's the hardest thing of all. To let go of someone you love.

Dylan Massett:
[reading the text message] She says, "Cool, everyone's asleep, I'm at my house, come over."

Norman Bates:
I can't go now. Not with all... This is crazy.

Dylan Massett:
This is the only thing that is not crazy, okay? Be a 17 year old for 5 minutes. Come on, go have fun.

Norman Bates:
Right now?

Dylan Massett:
Yeah, right now. She's waiting for you, dumb ass. Come on, leave!

[last lines]

Sheriff Alex Romero:
Norma Louise Bates, you're under arrest for the murder of Keith Summers.

Norma Louise Bates:
When I moved here, no one prepared me for the colossal, frickin' facedive off a cliff that living in this crazy town really is!

Norman Bates:
It's just a dream, Dylan.

Dylan Massett:
You wouldn't want to actually hurt anybody though, would you?

Norman Bates:
Of course wouldn't want to. I've never wanted to hurt anyone. Except you once in a while.

Norman Bates:
No matter where we go, things will always be the same, because you do things that don't make sense! You, you're crazy!

Norma Louise Bates:
I will sue you!

Matt Brownstein:
Okay, you can. But I'm $40,000 in debt, I live with my girl friend, and my mom owns my car. So I don't think...

Norma Louise Bates:
[whacks him in the head with her purse]

Dylan Massett:
This where they shot Deliverance?

Ethan Chang:
What's that?

Dylan Massett:
A movie. Ya know, "Boy, you got a pretty mouth."

Ethan Chang:
What kinda movies you watch?

Dylan Massett:
The kind where bad things happen to people in the middle of the woods.

Dylan Massett:
So, can we watch it, *and* smoke it?

Dylan Massett:
Can I give you some advice? You gotta cut that sh*t out. "Mother?" It's just weird.

Norman Bates:
It's just a habit. I guess calling your mom a "whore" is perfectly normal...

[last lines]

Jiao:
Help me...