Board James

James:
What was I thinking to make it this hard? I was an a**hole.

James:
It's a cruel game built only for the motherf***est of motherf***ers. That reminds me. [makes phone call]

Motherf***er Mike:
Hello?

James:
Get your ass over here, you motherf***er.

Motherf***er Mike:
All that f***ing sh*t and I'm f***ing dead?

Board James:
But this is a girls' game. This is for a little girl.

Mike:
[on phone] Hello. I know who it is, but I'm not telling. Ha ha.

Bad-Luck Bootsy:
F***. You. F*** you, you piece of f***ing sh*t!

Board James:
I think it's the taxi driver. [turns slowly toward the camera] Listen, you f***ers, you screw-heads. [jump cut] Listen, you f***ers, you screw-heads.

Fight Promoter:
Hey, pal, do me a favor. Read the back of da box.

Board James:
What?

Fight Promoter:
Read the back of da box. Just do it!

Board James:
Okay. [picks up box] "Here are the suspects. One of them is guilty of a murder. You start as a rookie..."

Fight Promoter:
Guilty of what?

Board James:
A murder, a crime, whatever.

Fight Promoter:
So it's a moider den?

Board James:
I guess. I dunno, I always thought it was a murder case. Who cares?

Fight Promoter:
Everything's always gotta be a moider case wit you.

Fight Promoter:
Let's cut to the chase. You killed your friends. You know it.

Board James:
No, it was the phone! The Dream Phone!

Fight Promoter:
I think you're da one dreamin', buddy. C'mon, a PINK PLASTIC PHONE from a LITTLE GIRL'S GAME?

Board James:
Yes! That's what happened.

Fight Promoter:
How does a PHONE pick up a knife?

Board James:
I don't know, that's what was so f***ing weird about it! I'm just trying to play a game!