Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2

Jeff:
The gene pool is a little shallow here. Dive in and you'll crack your skull open.

Stephen:
How many Heather Donahue's does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one!

Stephen:
There was a Safeway a while back...

Jeff:
That was in Burkittsville. I never shop in Burkittsville. I don't even piss there.

Jeff:
We're all virgins on this tour bus!

Erica:
May I have permission to take this leaf? Thank you!

Jeff:
Ladies and gentlemen, that there is a naked woman!

Erica:
We brought something back with us...

Kim:
Look, either you ring this stuff up or I call your manager.

Kim:
Really, Well PEGGY! Could you tell the b*tch, at the front register to do her goddamn job!

Kim:
I'm trying to find the energy...

Tristen:
Of the grave?

Kim:
To stand up. I'm exhausted, I've been on the road for two days straight.

Kim:
They never should've let you out. You're a long way from sane.

Jeff:
You know, there's a lot of nay Sayers who come and say nay.

Kim:
Oh yeah? Whip it out.

Jeff:
If you don't believe in the Blair Witch, then why the hell did you come along?

Kim:
I thought the movie was cool.

Tristen:
(Describing the death of Elly Kedward) They did it, the little Buster Boys! They did it, they did it, the little Buster Boys! They did it, the little Buster Boys from the Blair Village! Them going out into the woods to see if she was still alive, and then they pressed their palms into her flesh! And when they saw she was still alive, they set their dogs onto her, and they ripped her, and when they saw she was still alive, they tied her, and left her hanging from the big tree! (Calms down; speaks to Stephen) Stephen, you must think I'm going crazy!

Tristen:
(About Elly) But don't you think it's strange, how they banished her from Blair?

Erica:
Banished my ass! They dragged her out into the woods in the middle of winter and tied her to a f***in' tree to die!

Police officer:
(To Stephen) You're not makin' a believer out of me, son.

Tristen:
(About Elly) You've spoken to her!?!

Erica:
Not yet. But that's why I'm here.

Elly Kedward/The Blair Witch:
(Upon being accosted by a redneck) Oh yeah? Suck this.

Elly Kedward/The Blair Witch:
(To Peggy) Am I going to have a problem with you, too?

Elly Kedward/The Blair Witch:
Well, can you tell the b*tch at the cashier to do her f***ing job!

Elly Kedward/The Blair Witch:
(To Peggy) Keep your change!

Elly Kedward/The Blair Witch:
(Repeated line) Earth, Air, Fire, Water!

Elly Kedward/The Blair Witch:
Widdershins! Undo the Evil.

Elly Kedward/The Blair Witch:
(Reciting) Naiga kcab era sdik eht. (Reversal of The kids are back again)

Elly Kedward/The Blair Witch:
(To Stephen) But you can't understand, because you're so afraid! Just like those pathetic little children from the Blair Village.

Elly Kedward/The Blair Witch:
(To Kim) I can smell fear on you!

Jeff Donovan:
(About The Blair Witch Project) I couldn't see the movie when it first came out, because I was... (Pauses) In hospital. But since I was released, I have seen it, like, seventeen times.

Jeff Donovan:
(About tourists in Burkittsville) And when people come to my town, they come up to me and hug me, like, they say "It's real, man" and I'm like "Yeah, I know it's real too, dude." We've got a bond, man, like a connection.

Jeff Donovan:
(About Kim) She's a little weird. She thinks she's psychic or some sh*t.

Jeff Donovan:
That's right, my friends. For two glorious days and nights we will be walking the same path that the Witch herself once walked. Following the same path where her victim's blood was split, possibly using your own souls in the process.

Jeff Donovan:
(About their destination) The ruins of Rustin Parr's house.

Jeff Donovan:
(To a tour guide in the woods) Your balls will fall off in three days!

Steve Parker:
(About his girlfriend Tristen's death) It was all an accident! I swear to Christ it was all an accident!!

Steve Parker:
(Upon being asked if Tristen will be OK) I don't know.

Steve Parker:
Look, I'm just really stressed out, OK!?!

Steve Parker:
(To a German tourist) Just give us till dawn and we're out of here. We're cold, we're tired, and we're a little freaked out. We saw something at the Coffin Rock today.

Sheriff Cravens:
(To tourists running into the Black Hills) Get out of those woods and go home! Because there's no goddamn Blair Witch!

Sheriff Cravens:
(About the corpses of the German tourists) Their bodies were laid out in the shape of a Pentagram! Does that sound familiar?