CatDog

Cat:
You have to wake up pretty early in the afternoon to beat this cat.

Dog:
Don't worry, Cat. They're not laughing with you; they're laughing AT you!

Winslow T. Oddfellow:
Hey Einstein, you makin' a flyin' machine or just a racket?

Cat:
They all go haha with laughing at me, and they make me spill my Ice Cream all gone.

Dog:
Be that as it may, your actions were rash.

Cat:
Huh?

Dog:
Nevermind. You wouldn't understand .

Cat:
You did this to me, bow-wow person! You make the smarts go byebye! Gimme smarts back!

Dog:
I am... DOG THE MIGHTY!

Cat:
Yeah, mighty ridiculous!

Lola Caricola:
Hola. I am Lola.

Cat:
My body! My body! My body!

Lube:
Hey! That's not CatDog... it's CatCat!

Dog:
You know you love Winslow.

Cat:
Yeah. And nothing says lovin' like something from the oven.

Dog:
Hi ho diggety!

Dog:
It just doesn't get any better than this!

Mr. Sunshine:
Wait, does this mean there's an Easter Bunny?

Santa Claus:
There better be, he owes me sixty bucks.

Dog:
You mean you lied?

Cat:
That's what you do with pen pals.

Dog:
I never knew that.

Cat:
Ingrid, I have a confession to make. I'm not a black-belt, I'm a catdog.

Ingrid:
Well, I have a confession to make... [reveals her true identity, to be twins]... if you see what I mean.

Cat:
Oh, I get it! I'm a catdog, and you're a double bodied oddity!

Dog:
I can't decide what to eat first.

Cat:
What's the difference? There's four ingredients in everything!

Cat:
We've payed for food, but they refuse us service! It's plain un-American! First, they take away the tacos, then the chimichangas, which is a beautiful word! What next?

Dog:
Refried beans?

Cat:
Exactly!

Dog:
I got your postcard: "Dear Dog, Wish you were here. Cat."

Cat:
I meant every word!

Cat:
Hiya kids! Do you know what time it is? It's time to read some fan mail! Winslow, pass up those letters, my good man.

Winslow T. Oddfellow:
Nothing today, Chief.

Cat:
Are you sure?

Winslow T. Oddfellow:
Trust me. You two are as popular as a monkey in a banana patch. Forget about it.

Dog:
I have one! "Dear Us, Where did we come from? Signed, you and me."

Winslow T. Oddfellow:
Pathetic.

Cat:
Good question, Dog. As some may not realize, Dog and I are descendants of royalty.

Dog:
Right, royalty! Um... I don't get it.

Cat:
[whispering to Dog] Just work with me here, okay?

Dog:
Oh! Royalty! We were the King and Queen of England! We wore crowns of sausages, dental floss, and bowling balls!

Cat:
Yeah, well that was the rumor, but we did grow up in a beautiful country.

Dog:
Beautiful country high in the frigid peaks of the Florida Alps!

Cat:
Florida Alps?

Dog:
Then we learned to fly... out into outer space... and back down into the ocean! There, we found deep-sea leprechauns... and a void so dark, we got lost in a crazy negative demension!

Cat:
OKAY! OKAY! OKAY! THAT IS ENOUGH!

Dog:
You said, "work with me." I'm working with you.

Winslow T. Oddfellow:
And you two wonder why you never get fan mail? Sheesh Louis!

Cat:
[to Dog] Deep-sea leprechauns?

Cat:
Hey, Dog, take a peak at this sunset!

Dog:
I'm not here.

Cat:
I know, just take a look at the sunset, then you can resume not being here.

Cat:
Quiet, Dog! I've got to listen for my name on the radio!

Dog:
Aw, I coulda told ya that! It's CAT!

Dog:
Cat! I thought you said Fred was going to a nice place! He's in chains!

Cat:
They're "nice" chains.

[Dog believes that there are aliens who moved in next door, and he sees Winslow who came back from visiting them]

Dog:
They turned Winslow blue!

Cat:
He's always blue.

[Winslow bumps into the wall a couple times]

Dog:
They sucked out his brain!

Cat:
He probably forgot to put his contacts in.

Winslow T. Oddfellow:
Gee Wilikers!

[puts in his contacts]

Cat:
There. See?

Dog:
Winslow never ever said "gee wilikers" before!

Dog:
I hope I don't have a bad dream about aliens.

Cat:
I have a very strong feeling you will.

Cat:
You'll have to excuse us. Our stomach has been a little bit on the flippy side lately. Right, Dog?

Rancid Rabitt:
You share stomach? Fascinating. What's that like?

Dog:
[half awake] Millions... millions of people...

Cat:
[imitating Dog] Millions of people have asked us that same question.

Rancid Rabitt:
Oh. You guys must be really popular.

Cat:
[imitating Dog] Oh, yes. Especially with the girls. Cat here is a chick magnet.

Dog:
[referring to a stuffed cat of his] I'll call him Little Cat! Cause he looks like you, only littler.

Dog:
Your licking days are over, Dunglap! You're fired!

Cat:
You can't fire Dunglap! He's our best friend!

Dog:
Oh. Then, you're fired too!

Cliff:
Pleeeasssee tell me I'm not a freak!

Man:
Shut up you FREAK!

[after Cliff and Lube urinate all over the Golden Hyrdrant]

Shriek:
What's wrong with this picture?

[the golden hydrant becomes normal as the gold liquid runs down off of it]

Cliff:
Whoa! Either that hydrant's a fake or I got to get me to a doctor!

Eddie the Squirrel:
[runs his finger on the liquid on the hydrant] It's paint! Nothing but gold paint!

Ingrid #2:
I'll never dance with you two again! You stepped on my toes, and you ate my sister!

Ingrid #1:
[from inside CatDog] Ja!

Dance Fiesta Singer:
You've eaten everything in sight including my band!... and I love it! That was the most original dance I have ever seen!

Cat:
Hello, Ingrids. Care to cha-cha-cha?

Ingrid:
Ja-ja-ja!

Ingrid #1:
[dancing with Cat and sitting on her sister's shoulders] The band is good, ja?

Ingrid #2:
Ja. Look at him swing those drumsticks.

[the word, "drumsticks", echoes in Dog's head while he sees the drummer's drumsticks turn into turkey drumsticks]

Dog:
[to himself] Don't think about food. Don't even think about food!