Cottage to Let

Helen Barrington:
You know, George, I think you waste your time with the wrong sort of women.

Flt?Lieut. George Perry:
I never waste my time with any women.

Helen Barrington:
I quite believe that.

Mrs. Barrington:
Ladies and gentlemen, I declare this bizarre well and truly laid.

Mrs. Barrington:
And in conclusion, I can do no better than to quote the words of our great Prime Minister to the gallant boys of the RFA: Never have so much owed so many to so little.

Charles Dimble:
Good morning!

Alan Trently:
Good morning.

Charles Dimble:
Haven't we met somewhere before?

Alan Trently:
I don't think so.

Charles Dimble:
I've got a wonderful memory for faces.

Alan Trently:
Well, I haven't, but I think I'd remember yours. I mean...

Charles Dimble:
I was looking for you.

Alan Trently:
Oh, why?

Charles Dimble:
This card just came for you. Swiss stamp and a very curious message.

Alan Trently:
That's pretty cool nerve. Do you always read other people's letters?

Charles Dimble:
Certainly not. This isn't a letter. It's a postcard. Postcards are fair game.

Flt?Lieut. George Perry:
Hello!

Alan Trently:
I've, uh, brought your supper.

Flt?Lieut. George Perry:
Ah, that's very decent of you.

Alan Trently:
Well, they're shorthanded and I thought that I'd...

Flt?Lieut. George Perry:
[interrupting] Find Helen here, eh? Well, bad luck. She's gone.

[Alan starts to leave]

Flt?Lieut. George Perry:
Oh, don't run away.

Alan Trently:
I've got work to do!

Flt?Lieut. George Perry:
More domestic duties?

Ronald:
You can always tell a real butler. Butlers' faces are white. If they pinch the boss's port, they're red. Yours is brown.

John Barrington:
There is somebody supposed to be looking after you, isn't there?

Ronald:
Mmm. That butler of yours.

John Barrington:
Yes. Well, would you mind going back and being looked after again?

Mrs. Barrington:
Now, I want you to enjoy yourself. Do anything you like, but don't touch things. Do you hear? Ha-ha-ha. Never mind, never mind. Forget all about what a nuisance you are.