Democracy at Work

Steven Mime:
[after hearing a clip from the DP Dan Radio Show] What does that even mean, double penetration?

Hector:
It's a sex act. [Steven doesn't understand] When a person has two penises inside them at once.

Steven Mime:
How does that make him a more qualified radio host?

Ted Float:
If you see any of the Horvath people, tell them that I would f*** both my parents on national television for that job. I'm done with this local crap. County allocation, zoning problems, millage issues... I'd like to take a giant sh*t on the lot of them.

Meghan Oliver:
[talking about the rumor] Well, often these things fall into one of three categories: financial, sexual or other. Now, we hope for 'other', which could be easily deflected. Unless it somehow relates to illegal labor, or, dare I say, drug use. At that point I'd rather tackle 'sexual', unless it's like deviant with children or something. I guess in that instance 'financial' would be best. Of course barring any Madoff or TARP issues. Truthfully, in these situations, the best thing you can do is pray that your candidate magically drops dead.

Ted Float:
So that's a solid Plan A. How about a Plan B?

Steven Mime:
[on the phone with a caller] Well, thank you, caller. And, although I strongly disagree with your passionate plea to burn down candidate Richard O'Neal's house, we do appreciate your opinion.

Adrian Bluoff:
Remember in 2000, about a week before the election, the 'Bushies' dropped that 'ol "W liked to drink and drive a bit"?

Ted Float:
Yeah.

Adrian Bluoff:
Well, the way they put it out there made it seem like it came from the other side. And, because of that, the story was more about smear tactics and less about how much of an unconscionable f*** up George was... is.