Dorm Daze 2

Rusty:
If I didn't have a DUI already, I'd drive a bus through your VJ's.

Marla:
It was in our court mandated drug rehab that Lynne and I realized we needed to change.

Lynne:
We've become born-again virgins!

Marla:
It's so easy to lose control.

Lynne:
Yeah, like when you plan on giving a guy a blow job and it's just so much fun that you end up sleeping with him.

Rusty:
[laughs nervously]

Marla:
We have to resist these male advances. That's why from here on out I'm carrying a rape horn!

Lynne:
Me too!

Rusty:
Hey, Mrs. Bunkley, you're looking quite hot tonight.

Mrs. Bunkey:
Come back when you've grown a few inches, junior.

Rusty:
I'm growing a few inches right now.

Russian Drug Dealer #1:
Yeah. Is drugs.

Russian Drug Dealer #2:
Is drugs.

Russian Drug Dealer #1:
You buy.

Wang:
It looks like tar.

Pete Hanson:
Do you eat it or smoke it or what?

Russian Drug Dealer #1:
Yeah. Eat. Smoke. Is drugs. You buy.

Russian Drug Dealer #2:
You buy.

Booker McFee:
My favorite part of the play is when you showed your b*obs.

Pete Hanson:
Don't think of it as a monkey, think of him as drugs.

Booker McFee:
It's pretty cool you memorized the whole play.

Rachel Hubber:
It's great having a photographic memory.

Cliff:
Screw the script, I'm solving this pirate style!

Foosball:
What the hell is that thing? [referring to the monkey sitting next to Wang]

Wang:
His name is Choo-Choo. We were going to kill him and smoke him, but now we're teaching him to play Xbox.

Booker McFee:
Constance did... are you feeling well today? Did you remember your medication?

Gerri:
Great ad lib, Booker, so now I'm crazy for the rest of the play?

[on another group's play]

Robyn:
Apparently, they don't need a set. It's po mo, post-modern.

Lynne:
Like, in the future?

[it's becoming clear that Rusty only joined the abstinence support group to meet women.]

Marla:
Alright, I've heard enough. Let's put it to a vote. All in favor ejecting Rusty from the group, raise your hand.

Group:
[raising their hands in agreement] Yeah!

Lynne:
Yes, ejaculate him!