Ernest Scared Stupid

Kenny:
Ernest I got it! What we need is a tree house!

Ernest P. Worrell:
I thought we needed dress shields.

Trantor the Troll:
Bring me the head of Ernest P. Worrell!

Trantor the Troll:
You will die for the disgrace of your forefathers!

Ernest P. Worrell:
I didn't have four fathers! I only had one father and I didn't know him that well!

Ernest P. Worrell:
How 'bout a bumper sandwich, Boogerlips?

Ernest P. Worrell:
Oh, I sure hope you're from Keebler!

Ernest P. Worrell:
I never knew when to quit. Just ask my fourth grade teacher.

Ernest P. Worrell:
What good is a wooden dog? Oh, sure they swim better, but what am I gonna call him, Splinter?

Ernest P. Worrell:
Boy, Jimmy. When you play charades you play for keeps. Knowhatimean?

Elizabeth:
So in the hours just before midnight, the people of Briarville buried Trantor the Troll in the cold, damp ground. The end.

Teacher:
Thank you, Elizabeth. Class, what did you think of her report?

Teacher:
So, uh, Elizabeth, what was the curse the troll put on Phineas?

Elizabeth:
Well, legend has it that from that moment on, Phineas' descendants would get dumber and dumber... and dumber.

Ernest:
How 'bout a bumper sandwich, Boogerlips? Eh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh

[when seeing Trantor the Troll for the first time]

Ernest:
Ahhhhh! Boy, I sure hope you're from Keebler!

Ernest:
You better back off. You don't wanna fight me, I know tai chi, kung fu, chow mein, and I saw Hulkamania three times once in slow mo.

[repeated line]

Ernest's fourth grade Teacher:
He never knew when to quit.

[while driving to the treehouse with a now wooden Rimshot]

Ernest:
What good is a wooden dog? Oh, sure they swim better. But what am I going to call him? Splinter?

Ernest:
[about the troll] He looked like a big giant Mr. Potato Head. Except he was shaped more like a watermelon.

Ernest as a lumberjack:
There ain't no trees in Botswana. Nuh uh, I know. I AM a Botswanian lumberjack, and I ain't never had a job...

Ernest:
[as the old lady] A little nasal hygiene will go a long way young man. Here you go! [dumps milk on a troll] Be grateful, little trolls in China don't even get milk.

Ernest:
[being attacked by the troll] Help, help! May day! May day! Christmas Day! Colombus Day!

Old Lady Hackmore:
[to Kenny] Sometimes, you've got to do what YOU know is right, no matter what anybody tells you.

Ernest:
Gosh, Rimshot! Pretty soon, the kids won't have to worry about eating their Brussel sprouts because the Brussel sprouts will be eating them!