Freak Dance

Cocolonia's Mother:
Aaaaaaaa! What kind of music is this? It sounds like murder and drugs!

Cocolonia:
It's hip hop.

Cocolonia's Mother:
Hips should never be hopped! Not under my roofs! You're grounded to the house for the entire weekend. And Cocolonia, remember, today, I'm hosting the Censorship Fund-raiser. So please wear something opulent.

Doctor:
Mr. Asteroid, these x-rays indicate that your break dancing on the ceiling has caused a deadly tumor on your brain.

Asteroid:
But Doc, dancing on the ceiling is my signature move.

Doctor:
Your signature move is killing you. I'm afraid you have ten left to live.

Asteroid:
Ten what? Ten years? Ten months?

Doctor:
All we know for sure is ten.

Egghead:
I am so excited about the big audition. Dancing is a lot of fun.

Funky Bunch:
Fun? Dancing is life. Everyone who doesn't make the dance team today will be dead or in prison within the year.

Cocolonia:
I'm not so rich that I can't learn to be poor.

Building Inspector General:
God might want the people to dance, but the city does not. I must go. I have a battered woman's shelter to close down.

Rich Lady:
I heard that Dancing shot Kennedy!

Dazzle:
You killed my sister doing the Freak Dance on her.

Asteroid:
Nothing sorrows me more than the death of your older sister. I'm also sorry that the news of your sister's death caused your father's heart attack... and death... and the ambulance picking up your father ran over your dog. And after your dog died your house got robbed. And by robbed I mean they took your baby. Sorry for all that too.

Cocolonia:
Do you really think that I can become poor enough in so little time?

Funky Bunch:
I know you can you can do anything... if I'm showing you how.

Funky Bunch:
My penis is too poor for you?

Funky Bunch:
I heard you danced privately for money.

Barrio:
No Funky Bunch! Earlier, in the streets, Special Flavor saved me from la marijuana even though she is rich.

Funky Bunch:
Saving people is what dancing is all about.

Funky Bunch:
But we never got a chance to practice the forbidden dirty boogaloo.

Cocolonia:
Funky Bunch! My photographic memory. Let me read the Freak Dance scroll. I'll know all the moves, if you'll follow my lead. It will also look less rapey that way.

Cocolonia:
Wait, so you're not really Adolf Hitler Jr.?

Adolf Hitler Jr.:
No, I am Adolf Hitler Jr. But I, unlike my father, dance for good.