Friday

Mr. Jones:
I grab a dog. I choke him and I kick the sh*t out of him. All day long got my foot up a dog's ass. Just bang, bang, bang up his ass. That's my pleasure.

Pastor Clever:
Lord have mercy. The Lord is my shepherd... he know what I want.

Craig Jones:
You better get your ass off your shoulders and make that money.

Big Worm:
Playing with my money is like playing with my emotions, Smokey.

Smokey:
Puff puff, give. Puff puff, give. You're f***in' up the rotation.

Smokey:
Older the berry, the sweeter the juice.

Craig Jones:
Man, it's the blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice.

Smokey:
Yeah, well she blacker than a motherf***er too.

Smokey:
Remember it ,Write it down, take a picture, I don't give a f***.

Craig Jones:
We ain't got no sugar.

Smokey:
No sugar? Damn. Y'all ain't never got two things that match. Either ya got Kool-aid, no sugar. Peanut butter, no jelly. Ham, no burger. Daaamn.

Smokey:
I know you don't smoke weed, I know this; but I'm gonna get you high today, 'cause it's Friday; you ain't got no job... and you ain't got sh*t to do.

Smokey:
Weed is from the earth. God put this here for me and you. Take advantage man, take advantage.

Smokey:
You got to be a stupid motherf***er to get fired on your day off.

Ezal:
Aw, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. God. Oh, I'm hurt. Oh, my neck, my back, my neck and my back. Oh, I want $150,000, but we can settle out of court right now for twenty bucks.

Smokey:
You got knocked the f*** out... gimme my goddamn money... yeah payback's a motherf***er, Nigga.

Smokey:
You just got knocked the F*** out!

Smokey:
What's up Big Perm?... I mean Big Worm.

Craig Jones:
I felt sorry for Smokey, 'cause peer pressure is a motherf***er.

Craig Jones:
For most people, Friday's just the day before the weekend. But after this Friday, the neighborhood 'll never be the same.

Smokey:
Well, I'm going into rehab. I'm through with this sh*t.

Smokey:
I was just bullshittin'. And you know this, man.

Craig Jones:
What I'm trippin on, is how you gonna sell bud, when you smoke it?

Smokey:
I don't know. That's my only problem.

Craig Jones:
Big Worm gonna f*** you up.

Smokey:
Big Worm ain't gonna do a goddamn thing, man.

Craig Jones:
All right...

Smokey's mom:
Smokey, get me some cigarettes.

Smokey:
Well, give me some money.

Smokey:
Wait, this isn't enough.

Smokey's mom:
Make it enough.

Smokey:
I got mind control over Deebo. When he say shut up - I be quiet. But when he leave, I be talking again.

Smokey:
Ezal don't you tell no one.

Ezal:
Oh all right...

Ezal:
Hey everybody Smokey is taking a sh*t.

Smokey:
Ezel.

Ezal:
I won't tell anyone else.

Smokey:
Why you not goin' to work?

Craig Jones:
I got fired yesterday.

Smokey:
No sh*t? I thought you had the day off yesterday.

Craig Jones:
I did. I went in to pick up my check, came home, my supervisor called me about four o'clock, told me he got me on tape stealing boxes.

Smokey:
The f*** you stealing boxes for? What you trying to build, a clubhouse?

Ezal:
Smoke, buy me a 40oz for my birthday.

Smokey:
Today your birthday?

Ezal:
What's today?

Deebo:
Come on Smoke, Stanley left his window open.

Smokey:
I can't I'm on probation.

Deebo:
Stop being a b*tch and come on.

Ezal:
Smokey, you know I ain't the smartest man in the world, but, from back here it look like you're takin a sh*t.

Joi:
Well you just tell the b*tch, whoever she is, when I find her I'm gonna beat her ass.

Big Worm:
Can't have sh*t I'm closed, Fat Boy.

Big Worm:
My money.

Smokey:
I've been smokin' ever since I was two.

Big Worm:
Don't make me cut ya balls off & hand 'em to ya, patna.

Joann:
Damn, Smoke, don't be banging on the door like you the damn po-lice.

Smokey:
Well round here, between Harmony and Western, we call this here a little twenty twen twen...

Craig Jones:
Right...

Smokey:
Nigga...

Smokey:
You didn't put in on this man.

Deebo:
What's up, Stanley?

Deebo:
Well, f**k you, then, punk.

Smokey:
Why don't you tell your daddy to comb his damn hair, look like some spiders is having a meetin' on his head.

Ezal:
you can have your knife back cause I steal I don't kill.

Red:
My pops told me to ask for my bike back... you know I wouldn't trip.

Smokey:
Me and Deebo, we got about two hundred dollars.

Deebo:
I got about two hundred dollars.

Craig Jones:
Mom, loan me 200 dollars.

Mrs. Jones:
Craig, I wouldn't feel comfortable lending you money without a job.

Craig Jones:
If I had a job, I wouldn't need to borrow any money.

Mrs. Jones:
Exactly.

My grandmama gave me this chain

She said she look like Janet Jackson

Mr jones. Everytime I come in the kitchen, you in the kitchen.