Gerald McBoing-Boing

Narrator:
This is the story of Gerald McCloy, and the strange thing that happened to that little boy. They say it all started when Gerald was two. That's the age kids start talking, least most of them do. Well, when he started talking, you know what he said? He didn't talk words, he went... [boing, boing]... instead.

Narrator:
Ten months passed, and Gerald grew louder and louder, 'till one day he went... [Loud explosion]... like a big keg of powder.

Narrator:
[from letter] From Public School 7 to Mrs. McCloy: Your little son Gerald's a most helpless boy. We cannot accept him, for we have a rule that pupils must not go... [cuckoo]... in our school. Your boy will go... [boing]... his whole life, I'm afraid. Sincerly yours, Penny Schultz, teacher, first grade.

Narrator:
But as little Gerald grew older, he found, when a fella goes... [honk, honk]... no one wants him around. When a fella goes... [boing, boing]... he can't have any pals, and his... [alarm bell ringing]... frightened the gals. "Nyah-nyah!" they all shouted. "Your name's not McCloy! You're Gerald McBoing-Boing, the noise-making boy!'

Radio Station Owner:
Stop! Aren't you Gerald McBoing-Boing, the lad who makes squeaks? Why, boy, I've searched for you many long weeks. I can make you the most famous lad in the nation, for I own the... [plays "dong, ding, dong" on bells]... radio station. I need a smart fellow to make all the sounds, to bark like a dog... [Gerald barks]... and bay like the hound. [Gerald howls] Your 'dong' is terrific, your 'toot' is inspired. [Gerald makes bell sounds] Quick, come to... [dong, ding, dong]... McBoing-Boing, you're hired!

Narrator:
Now his parents, proud parents, are able to boast that their Gerald's... [car horn]... is known coast to coast. Our Gerald is rich, he has friends, he's well fed, but he doesn't speak words. He goes... [boing-boing]... instead.

Gerald's Father:
[about Gerald going "boing"] What's that?

Narrator:
...cried his father, his face turning gray.

Gerald's Father:
That's a very odd thing for a young boy to say!

Narrator:
And poor Gerald's father rushed to the phone, and quick-dialed the number of Dr. Malone.

Gerald's Father:
[on the phone] Come over fast!

Narrator:
...the poor father plead.

Gerald's Father:
Our boy can't speak words! He goes boing-boing instead!