Godspell

Judas:
Now what the Good Master is telling us all right now is that up in Heaven, there are about a hundred million little tiny angels about 'yea' by 'yea', and they all take shorthand. And every time you do something silly, they write it in a...

Jesus:
No, no.

Judas:
That's not what the Good Master is telling us?

Joanne:
C'mere Jesus, I got something ta show ya!

Judas:
Then the man they called Judas Iscariot went to the chief priests and said, "What will you give me to betray him to you?" They paid him thirty pieces of silver, and from that moment he began to look out for an opportunity to betray him.

Jesus:
Consider the lilies of the field. They don't work. They don't spin. Yet I tell you - Solomon in all his splendor was not attired like one of these. Now, if that's how God clothes the grass, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown unto the fire, will He not all the more clothe YOU?

Jesus:
How do you remove a speck of sawdust from your brother's eye when all the while there's a big plank in your own?

Judas:
I don't know, how do you remove a speck of sawdust from your brother's eye when all the while there's a big plank in your own?

Jesus:
You hypocrite!

Judas:
Wha-ha?

Jesus:
First you take the plank out of your own eye so you can see clearly to remove the speck of sawdust from your brother's eye!

Judas:
That's no answer to the question!

Jesus:
Did I promise you an answer to the question?

Judas:
Ah... No.

Jesus:
Sorry, no goats.

Jeffrey:
Baaaaaa-lony.

Gilmer:
Hey, I can't see!

Gilmer:
I had my eyes shut.

Pharisee Monster:
What is the greatest Commandment of them all?

Jesus:
Thou shalt love the Lord, youe God, with all your heart and your soul." This is the greatest Commandment of them all. The second is like it: "Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself." All the rest of the Law and what the prophets have written is based on these first two.