Great Performances

T. E. Lawrence:
All men dream; but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds Awake to find that it was vanity; But the dreamers of day are dangerous men. That they may act their dreams with open eyes to make it possible.

T. E. Lawrence:
I loved you, so I drew these tides of men into my hands and wrote my will across the sky in stars, To gain you Freedom, the seven-pillared worthy house, that your eyes might be shining for me, when I came.

Andrew Lloyd Webber:
What I want to celebrate tonight has nothing to do with really myself, but the future - please - of musical theatre.

Andrew Lloyd Webber:
I don't know why I'm frightened, but I am.

John Huston:
He's a much bigger star today than when he was alive. He has become what amounts to a cult figure.

John Huston:
[On "The Maltese Falcon":] The original intention was to have George Raft play it. But he pulled away from it because he didn't want to trust his career to a young director, someone who had never directed before. And Bogart, to my secret delight, was substituted. And that picture began, I think, a whole new career for Bogey.

Alistair Cooke:
The Maltese Falcon was the thing that finally isolated the Bogart character. That to me is the quintessential Bogart. I think that all that matters in great filmmaking, certainly all that matters in Bogart, is what you're seeing going on in his mind from just looking at his face. The camera was made for him, and he was made for it.

Lauren Bacall:
As a result of Casablanca, Jack Warner made the brilliant discovery that Bogey had sex appeal ... As you might imagine, Bogey thought that was pretty funny. He said, "I'm the same man I have always been. Jack doesn't realize that if Bergman looks at any man with love in her eyes, he must have sex appeal."

Lauren Bacall:
It was 1944. I was 19, brand new in Hollywood and under personal contract to director Howard Hawks. Now, Howard had told me he wanted me to be in a movie with either Cary Grant or Humphrey Bogart. I thought, "Wow, Cary Grant!" I'd already tested for To Have And Have Not and was going to be in it with, of course, Bogey's approval. One day I was going into Hawks' office, and Bogey was on his way out. As we passed, he said, "Oh by the way, I saw your test ... We'll have a lot of fun together." He was right about that.

Lauren Bacall:
I never stopped shaking. I was very nervous. He was very patient. He did everything to make me comfortable. I was very lucky to start my career with him. You see, Bogey was, above all else, a professional. He'd had years on the stage and over fifty films. He believed in actors and he believed in actors working together. He believed in truth and he missed nothing.

Lauren Bacall:
For his performance as Charlie Allnut Bogey got his second Oscar nomination for Best Actor. The response to his winning amazed Bogey. He had never thought of himself as a popular choice as well as a deserving one. To him, acting was collaborative, never competitive. He took great pride in his profession. He liked being an actor.

Lauren Bacall:
For myself, I can only say that he changed me. He was my teacher my husband, my friend. In his life and his work, Bogey was integrity, truth, and courage. He taught me how to live. That it was okay to trust. He taught me to keep going no matter what. He did. And he is.

Grizabella:
Touch me! It's so easy to leave me all alone with the memory of my days in the sun. If you touch me, you'll understand what happiness is. Look! A new day has begun.

Munkustrap:
[speaking about Rumpus Cat] You never saw anything fiercer!

[Rumpus Cat's hair stands on end]

Munkustrap:
...Or hairier.

Jennyanydots the Gumbie Cat:
Bustopher Jones is not skin and bones.

Bombalurina:
In fact, he's remarkably fat.

Jellylorum:
He doesn't haunt pubs.

Jennyanydots the Gumbie Cat:
He has eight or nine clubs...

Jennyanydots the Gumbie Cat, Bombalurina, Jellylorum:
For he's the St. James' Street cat.

Rum Tum Tugger:
You ought to ask Mr. Mistoffoles, the original conjuring cat. There can be no doubt about that. Please, listen to me and don't scoff. All his inventions are off his own bat.

Old Deuteronomy:
My legs may be tottery. I must go slow and be careful of Old Deuteronomy.

Old Deuteronomy:
With cats, some say one rule is true: don't speak 'til you are spoken to. Myself, I do not hold with that. I say you should address a cat, but always keep in mind that he resents familiarity. You bow, and taking off your hat, address him in this form: O, Cat!

Bombalurina, Demeter, Jellylorum:
But, when the day's hustle and bustle is done, then the gumbie cat's work is but hardly begun. She thinks that the cockroaches...

Jennyanydots the Gumbie Cat:
Just need employment...

Bombalurina, Demeter, Jellylorum:
To prevent them from...

Jennyanydots the Gumbie Cat:
Idle and wanton destroyment.

Bombalurina, Demeter, Jellylorum:
So she's formed from that lot of disorderly louts a troop of well-disciplined, helpful boy scouts...

Jennyanydots the Gumbie Cat:
With a purpose in life and a good deed to do...

Bombalurina, Demeter, Jellylorum:
And she's even created a beetle's tatoo!

Rum Tum Tugger:
And we all say... oh well I never! Was there ever a cat so clever as Magical Mr. Mistofelees!

Mungojerrie:
It was... Mungojerrie!

Rumpleteazer:
And Rumpleteazer!

Mungojerrie:
And there's nothing at all to be done about that!

Munkustrap:
Are you blind when you're born?

Demeter:
Can you see in the dark?

Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat:
Dare you look at a king?

Asparagus:
Would you sit on his throne?

Rum Tum Tugger:
Can you say of your bite that it's worse than your bark?

Alonzo:
Are you cock of the walk...

Grizabella:
...when you're walking alone?

Munkustrap:
Because Jellicles are and Jellicles do. Jellicles do and Jellicles would. Jellicles would and Jellicles can. Jellicles can and Jellicles do.

Bustopher Jones:
When I'm seen in a hurry, there's probably curry at the Siamese or at the Glutton.

Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat:
From the driver and the guards to the bagmen playing cards, I would supervise them all. [beat] More or less...

Rum Tum Tugger:
Old Deuteronomy's buried nine wives, and more I am tempted to say... 99.

Asparagus:
[mockingly] Jellicle cats are roly-poly!

Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat, Mr. Mistoffelees:
We know how to dance a gavote and a jig!

All:
If it happens the sun is shining bright...

Rum Tum Tugger:
...you'd say we had nothing to do at all!

Demeter:
I might mention Mungojerrie.

Bombalurina:
I might mention Griddlebone.

Demeter, Bombalurina:
Are nothing more but agents for the cat who all the time just controls the operation, the Napoleon of Crime!

Mr. Mistoffelees:
The Rum Tum Tugger is a [rolls eyes] terrible bore!

Anatoly Sergievsky:
[singing] How could I leave her? Where would I start? Let man's petty nations tear themselves apart. My lands only borders lie around my heart!

Frederick Trumper:
I'd let you watch, I would invite you, but the queens we use would not excite you.

Florence Vassy:
Well, we can't complain that you've been ignored by the press.

Frederick Trumper:
What'd they say? What'd they say?

Florence Vassy:
They're not too polite.

Frederick Trumper:
They say I'm a sh*t?

Florence Vassy:
Well, yes. [singing] In five different languages.

Alexander Molokov:
[singing] Bit by bit the pieces fit, the Soviet Machine advances, not one move that won't improve our nations' chances. We predict a stunning victory, both on the board and off it, this will show the traitor no one rats with profit!

Arbiter:
[singing] I've a duty as a referee, at the start of a match. On behalf of all our sponsors I must welcome you, which I do - there's a catch: I don't care if you're a champion, No one messes with me. I am ruthless in upholding what I know is right, black or white, as you'll see.

Florence Vassy:
[singing] Everybody's playing the game, but nobody's rules are the same, nobody's on nobody's side.

Civil Servants:
You play Chess, you are good at it? [other diplomat whispers to him] Oh, I hear you're world champion.

Anatoly Sergievsky:
Since yesterday.

Civil Servants:
That's still good.

Walter de Courcy:
Anatoly's return to the Soviet Union is a very decent gesture It's virtually assured us some very important collateral including your father. He must have done it for you, he wouldn't have done it for me. We'll get your father out if he's still alive.

Florence Vassy:
What did you say?

Walter de Courcy:
Well, we can't be sure he is alive. But, then, you couldn't be sure he was dead. No change there, ah? You'll be back next year. It's only a game.

Florence Vassy:
No! I've spent my whole life playing games.

Anatoly Sergievsky, Florence Vassy, Alexander Molokov, Arbiter:
[singing] It's very sad to see the ancient and distinguished game that used to be, a model of decorum and tranquility, become like any other sport, a battleground for rival ideologies to slug it out with glee.

Walter de Courcy:
We all want times in our careers when we make a little history. Receive the plaudits of our peers; perhaps that time is here right now for me.

Frederick Trumper:
Pity the child who has ambition, knows what he wants to do Knows that he'll never fit the system others expect him to. Pity the child who knew his parents, saw their faults, saw their love die before his eyes. Pity the child that wise. He never asked "Did I cause your distress?"... just in case they said "Yes."

Arbiter:
Each game of chess, means there's one less variation left to be played. Each day got through, means one or two, less mistakes remain to be made.

Robert:
[singing] Somebody hold me too close, somebody hurt me too deep...

Robert:
But alone is alone, not alive.

Robert:
[singing] Marry me a little, Love me just enough. Cry, but not too often. Play, but not too rough.

Joanne:
I'd like to propose a toast...

Marta:
You know what this city is? Where a person can feel it? It's in a person's ass.

Amy:
A person can't stand all that sweetness, Paul. Nobody human can stand all that everlasting affection!

Robert:
Amy, Paul can't find his good cufflinks!

Amy:
They're on the dresser, right next to my suicide note.

Paul:
Listen, Amy, married people are no more marriage than musicians are music. Just because some of the people might be wrong doesn't matter. It is still right.

Amy:
Yes, well, I'll put that on a sampler, Paul.

Robert:
[singing] All the stings, the ugly things, we'll keep unsaid. We'll build a cocoon of love and respect. You promise whatever you like, I'll never collect.

Robert:
Everybody who ever fell in love and got married.

Joanne:
I know both couples and they're both divorced.

Robert:
[singing] Somebody crowd me with love! Somebody force me to care! Somebody let me come through! I'll always be there, as frightened as you, to help us survive being alive.

Robert:
[singing] Make me confused! Mock me with praise! Let me be used! Vary my days...

Irene:
So which is it, Bobby? Me... or Deadrock?

Bobby:
[looks uneasily between her and his mother, then grabs letter and runs away] Taxi! Grand Central Station!

Polly Baker:
Do you wanna dance Bobby?

Bobby:
Who could ask for anything more?

Sir Richard Kitchen:
I became a pain in the arse. In the arse of this world I deployed my talents.

Emily Whitman, Theodore Whitman:
Relax, and listen to the rain on the roof go plunk planka plink plunk planka plink planka. Let's have a drink and shelter from the showers! Rain, rain, don't go away, fill up the sky, rain through the night, we'll stay cozy and dry.

Buddy:
I've got those... God-why-don't-you-love-me-oh-you-do-I'll-see-you-later Blues!

Sally:
I dim the lights and think about you; spend sleepless nights to think about you; you said you loved me, but were you just being kind? Or am I losing my mind?

Phyllis:
Lucy's a lassie you pat on the head; Jessie is classy, but virtually dead! Lucy wants to be classy, Jessie wants to be lassie; if Lucy and Jessie could only combine I can tell you someone who would finally feel just fine!

Ben:
Success is swell, and success is sweet, but every height has a drop. The less achievement, the less defeat; What's the point of shovin' your way to the top? Livin' laughin' lovin' you're never a flop!

Buddy:
Margie! Oh, Margie! She says she really loves me!; She says she really cares; She says that I'm her hero; she says, I'm perfect she swears! She says that if we parted, she says that she'd be sick; she say's she's mine forever; she says, and I gotta get away from her quick!

Sally:
No, don't talk to me, Ben, I forget! What were we like? It's so hazy! Look at these people, aren't they eerie? Look at this party, isn't it dreary? I'm so glad I came!

Phyllis:
Leave you? Leave you? How could I leave you? Sweetheart, I have to confess... COULD I leave you? Yes. WILL I leave you? Guess!

Ben:
The roads you never take go through rocky ground, don't they? The choices that you make aren't all that grim. The worlds you never see still will be around, won't they? The Ben I'll never be, Who remembers him?

Buddy:
Sally! Oh, Sally! She says she loves another; she says a fella she prefers; she says that he's her idol; she says, ideal, she avers; she says that anybody would suit her more than I; she says that I'm a washout, she says, and I love her so much, I could die!

Buddy:
Waiting around for the girls upstairs, after the curtain came down; money in my pocket to spend; "Honey, could you maybe get a friend for my friend?"

Ben:
Hearing the sounds of the girls above, dressing to go on the town...

Buddy:
Clicking heels on steel and cement...

Ben:
Picking up the giggles floating down through the vent...

Buddy, Ben:
God damnedest hours that I ever spent were waiting for the girls upstairs!

Sally:
In Buddy's arms, on Buddy's shoulder, I won't get older. Nothing dies. And all I ever dreamed I'd be, the best I ever thought of me, is every minute there to see, in Buddy's eyes.

Stella Deems:
Who's that woman? I know I know that woman, so clever; but ever so sad! Love, she said, was a fad! The kind of love that she couldn't make fun of, she'd have none of. Who's that woman, that cheery, weary woman who's dressing for yet one more spree? Each day I see her pass, in my looking glass. Lord, Lord, Lord! That woman is me!

Carlotta Campion:
Good times and bum times, I've seen 'em all and, my dear, I'm still here! Plush velvet sometimes, sometimes just pretzels and beer, but I'm here! I've run the gamut, A to Z. Three cheers and dammit, c'est la vie! I got through all of last year, and I'm here! Lord knows, at least I was there, and I'm here!

Carlotta Campion:
I've gotten through "Hey, lady, aren't you whoozis? Wow! What a looker you were!" Or, better yet, "Sorry, I thought you were whoozis. Whatever happened to her?"

Sally, Ben:
Too many mornings wasted in pretending I reach for you. How many mornings are there still to come! How much time can we hope that there will be? Not much time, but it's time enough for me. If there's time to look up and be/see Sally standing at the door, Sally moving to the bed, Sally resting in your/my arms, with your head against my head.

Buddy:
The right girl-yeah! The right girl-yeah! She sees you're nothing and thinks you're king! She knows you've got other songs to sing. You still could be, hell, well anything when you've got-yeah! The right girl-yeah! And I got...

Phyllis:
Could I live through the pain on a terrace in Spain? Would it pass? It would pass! Could I bury my rage with a boy half your age in the grass? Bet your ass!

[as the cast continues a dream Follies number, Ben forgets his lyrics and tries to get out]

Ben:
Look at me! I'm nobody! Can't you see that I'm a fraud? You couldn't love me! no one could! All I'd do is hurt you, tell you lies! Her zipper stuck, and you kept saying "I love you! I love you!" I only wanted her 'till I had her! After that, it didn't matter! I got a job, and it was easy! But they'll never know! I'm too smart for them! You hear me? They'll never catch me! I'm too smart! I'm too... smart... NO!

Ben:
Me, I like to live, me, I like to laugh, me... [he goes blank] me, I like... I like... me... me, I don't love me!

[Buddy imagines his affair with a woman named Margie]

Buddy:
Hey, Margie. It's day, babe. My flight goes - no, stay, babe. You know how you cry, babe - stay home. Be good now, we'll speak, babe. It might be next week, babe - Hey, Margie - goodbye, babe - I gotta go home.

Young Sally:
Hi...

Young Ben:
Girls.

Young Phyllis:
Ben?

Young Buddy:
Sally?

Hattie Walker:
At my tiny flat, it's just my cat, a bed, and a chair. Still - I'll stick it till I'm on a bill all over Times Square!

Young Sally:
I may burn the toast.

Young Buddy:
Oh, well... I may make a rotten host.

Young Sally:
Do tell...

Young Sally, Young Buddy:
But no matter what goes wrong, love will see us through till something better comes along!

Young Ben, Young Phyllis:
Today was perfectly perfect, you say. Well, don't go away, 'cause if you think you liked today, you're gonna love tomorrow - mmhmm - just stick around and see - mmhmm, and if you love tomorrow, think of how it's gonna be. Tomorrow's what you're gonna have a lifetime of with me!

Heidi Schiller, Young Heidi:
All things beautiful must die...

Young Heidi:
Now that our love is done...

Heidi Schiller:
Lover, give me...

Heidi Schiller, Young Heidi:
...one more kiss and - goodbye!

Mary:
Should I bring him down? Should I scream and shout? Should I speak of love, let my feelings out? I never thought I'd come to this! What's it all about?

Judas:
Nazareth, your famous son should have stayed a great unknown. Like his father carving wood, he'd have made good. Tables, chairs and oaken chests would have suited Jesus best. He'd have cause nobody harm.

Jesus:
My God, why have you forgotten me?

Jesus:
Father, into your hands I commend my spirit!

Second Priest:
His glamour increases by leaps every minute. He's top of the pole.

Judas:
I haven't thought at all about my own reward; I didn't really come here of my own accord. Just don't say I'm damned for all time!

Annas:
Cut the protesting, forget the excuses. We want information, get up off the floor!

Caiaphas:
We have the papers we need to arrest him. You know his movements, we know the law.

Annas:
Your help in this matter will not go unrewarded.

Caiaphas:
We'll pay you in silver, cash on the nail. We just need to know where the soldiers can find him...

Annas:
With no crowd around him.

Caiaphas:
Then we can't fail.

Judas:
I don't need your blood money!

Caiaphas:
Oh, that doesn't matter, our expenses our good.

Judas:
I don't want your blood money!

Annas:
But you might as well take it. We think that you should.

Caiaphas:
Think of the things you could do with that money. Choose any charity - give to the poor. We've noted your motives, we've noted your feelings. This isn't blood money, it's a fee, nothing... fee, nothing... fee, nothing more.

King Herod:
Jesus, I am overjoyed to meet you, face to face. You've been getting quite a name all around the place. Healing cripples, raising from the dead, and now I understand your God. At least, that's what you've said.

Jesus:
I have got no kingdom in this world, I'm through, through, through.

Crowd:
Talk to me, Jesus!

Jesus:
I may have a kingdom somewhere, if I only knew!

Pontious Pilate:
Then you're a King?

Jesus:
It's you who say I am! I know the truth, and find that I get damned!

Pontious Pilate:
But what IS truth? Not easy to define! We both have truths! Are yours the same as mine?

Crowd:
Crucify him! Crucify him!

Pontious Pilate:
What do you mean? You'd crucify your king?

Crowd:
We have no king but Caesar!

Pontious Pilate:
He's done no wrong! No, not the slightest thing!

Crowd:
We have no king but Caesar! Curcify him!

Pontious Pilate:
What is this new respect for Caesar? 'Til now this has been noticably LACKING! Who is this Jesus? Why is he different? You Jews produce messiahs by the sackful!

Crowd:
We need him crucified! It's all you have to do! We need him crucified! It's all you have to do!

Pontious Pilate:
Talk to me, Jesus Christ.

Caiaphas:
(to the Pharises) Fools! You have no perception! The stakes that we're gambling are frightfully high! We must crush him completely! So, like John before him, this Jesus must die! For the sake of the nation, this Jesus must die!

Pontious Pilate:
Look at your Jesus Christ! I'll agree, he's mad! Ought to be locked up! But this is not a reason to destroy him! He's a sad little man! Not a king or a god! Not a thief! I need a crime!

Crowd:
Kill him! He says he's God! He's a blasphemer! He'll conquer you and us, and even Caesar!

Pontious Pilate:
Who is this broken man cluttering up my hallway? Who is this unfortunate?

Annas:
Someone Christ, King of the Jews.

Pontious Pilate:
Oh, so this is Jesus Christ; I am really quite surprised, you look so small! Not a king at all! We all know that you're a news, but are you King? King of the Jews?

Jesus:
That's what you say.

King Herod:
Hey! Aren't you scared of me, Christ? Mister Wonderful Christ? You're a joke, you're not the Lord! You are nothing but a fraud! Take him away, he's got nothing to say! Get out you king of the - Get out - Get out you king of the Jews!

Caiaphas:
I see bad things arising! They would make king whom the Romans would ban! I see blood and destruction, our elimination because of one man!

Pontious Pilate:
Why is he different? You Jews produce "messiahs" by the sackful!

Simon Zealotes:
You'll Get the power and the glory, forever and ever and ever!

Judas:
Yes, I can understand that she amuses. But to let her stroke you and kiss your hair, is hardly in your line.

Judas:
All your followers are blind... too much heaven on their minds!

Judas:
You have set them all on fire. Heh! They think they've found their new messiah! And they'll hurt you when they find they're wrong!

Jesus:
Can you show me now that I would not be killed in vain? Show me just a little of your omnipresent brain! Show me there's a reason for you wanting me to die! You're far too keen on when and how, and not so hot on why!

Pontious Pilate:
And so this king is once again my guest. And why is this? Was Herod unimpressed?

Caiaphas:
We turn to Rome to sentence Nazareth. We have no law to put a man to death. We need him crucified. It's all you have to do.

Caiaphas, Annas:
We need him crucified. It's all you have to do.

Pontious Pilate:
Talk to me, Jesus Christ. You have been brought here, manacled, beaten by your people! Do you have the first idea why you deserve it? Listen, King of the Jews! Where is your kingdom? Look at me, am I a Jew?

Crowd:
Crucify him! Crucify him!

Pontious Pilate:
Behold the man! Behold your shattered king!

Crowd:
We have no king but Caesar!

Pontious Pilate:
You hypocrites! You hate us more than him!

Crowd:
We have no king but Caesar! Crucify him!

Pontious Pilate:
I find no reason! I see no evil! This man is harmless, so why does he upset you? He's just misguided, thinks he's important! But to keep you vultures happy I shall flog him!

Pontious Pilate:
Where are you from, Jesus? What do you want, Jesus? Tell me. You've got to be careful. You could be dead soon, could well be. Why do you not speak when I hold your life in my hands? How can you stay quiet? I don't believe you'd understand.

Jesus:
You have nothing in your hands. Any power you have... comes to you from far beyond. Everything is fixed and you can't change it.

Pontious Pilate:
You're a fool, Jesus Christ! How can I help you?

Crowd:
Pilate, crucify him! Crucify! Remember Caesar! You have a duty to keep the peace, so crucify him! Remember Caesar! You'll be demoted! You'll be deported! Crucify him!

[crowd repeats "Remember Caesar! You have a duty, etc." two more times]

Pontious Pilate:
[shouts] Don't let me *stop* your great self-destruction! Die if you want to, you misguided martyr! I wash my hands of your demolition! Die if you want to, you innocent... puppet!

Vocalist:
Jimmy started goofing off, and I'm completely unfocused and now the show is ruined.

Vocalist:
His hat reeks of ah-thor-i-tay.

Vocalist:
I'm already exhausted, depleted, deflated... excited... retarded.

Vocalist:
I'd say 99% of the time, I'm working on my golf game... yeah, I... no.

Vocalist:
Backstage it's a hellish nightmare of chaos. [shouts] Absolute pandemonium.

Vocalist:
Okay, if you like zee shows you say 'vas-up, vas-up'. If you don't like the shows, you say 'ish-don-sink-so!'

Vocalist:
[after playind drums] Why do I do that? Makes me so hot and stupid!

Vocalist:
No room for a mosh pit tonight...

Vocalist:
[before a show] Let's go out there and let's try not to poop ourselves all over the stage.

Vocalist:
I threw up a little in my mouth...

Vocalist:
[playind a keyboard] There's no sound coming out! But I'm playin anyway! Cause I'm crazy like that!

Vocalist:
You say no weapons? What about these guns, huh? [kisses biceps]

Vocalist:
Eh, I'm just gonna pass out, I'm sorry.

Fred Graham 'Petruchio':
The studio has fired you. You have the worst temper in show biz. You bit King Kong and gave him rabies!

First Man:
Miss Vanessi, you've been my ideal for years. I married my wife 'cause in a certain light, when it's kind of dark, she might pass for your sister.

Harrison Howell:
Graham, you're a man of the world. We both know that women need a firm hand from time to time. In fact, between you and me, they like it.

Fred Graham 'Petruchio':
'Women should be struck regularly, like gongs'?

Harrison Howell:
Who said that?

Fred Graham 'Petruchio':
Noel Coward.

Harrison Howell:
Now there's a man I'd like to meet! A straight talker!

Fred Graham 'Petruchio':
Not exactly...!

Harrison Howell:
Thank you Graham. I think I can make this little woman happy.

Akira Kurosawa:
As a storyteller I have no secrets.

Narrator:
Until his death in 1998, Kurosawa directed over thirty films, including 'Rash?mon', 'Seven Samurai', 'Throne of Blood' and 'Ran'. His work was a huge influence of directors like George Lucas and Steven Spielberg, who revered him as a master of the cinema. He was criticised in Japan for appealing to an International audience, yet he did more than anything else to reveal Japanese society to the West.

Steven Spielberg:
This year the Academy's Board of Governors have voted an Honorary Academy Award to a man who many of us believe is our greatest living filmmaker, and all of us know if one of the few true visionaries ever to work in our medium.

Narrator:
In 1990, at the age of eighty the Japanese director Akira Kurosawa was given an honorary Oscar at the Academy Awards in Hollywood.

Akira Kurosawa:
[in Japanese] I am deeply honoured to receive such a prestigious award. Thank you.

[the archbishop is waiting for Cunegonde. Candide is confused]

Candide:
Him too?!

Cunegonde:
[referring to the archbishop and the Jew] Both of them... sharing me...separate days.

[Candide is trying to explain to an old man, who is Dr. Pangloss, who they are]

Candide:
But Dr. Pangloss, we but your own Candide, and Cunegonde, and Paquette, and Maximillion and...Patti LuPone!

The Old Lady:
[seeing the the dead bodies of the Jew and the Archbishop on the floor] Leave you alone for FIVE minutes!

Marius:
Oh my friends, my friends, forgive me, that I live and you are gone... There's a grief that can't be spoken, there's a pain goes on and on.

Fantine:
I had a dream my life would be so different from this hell I'm living. So different now from what it seemed... Now life has killed the dream I dreamed.

Cosette:
A heart full of love... A night full of you - the words are old, but always true! O God, for shame, you did not even know my name.

Marius:
Dear Mademoiselle, I was lost in your spell...

Grantaire:
Drink with me to days gone by... Can it be, you fear to die? Will the world remember you when you fall? Could it be your death means nothing at all? Is your life just one more lie?

Thenardier:
Here's a tasty ring! Pretty little thing! Wouldn't want to waste it, that would really be a crime... Thank you sir, I'm in your debt. Here's a little toy! Take it of the boy! His heart's no longer going, and he's lived his little time - but his watch is ticking yet...

Enjolras:
It is time for us all all to decide who we are... Do we fight for the right to a night at the opera now? Have you asked of yourselves what's the price you might pay? Is it simply a game, for rich young boys to play? The colour of the world is changing, day by day... Red - the blood of angry men, black - the dark of ages past, red - a world about to dawn, black - the night that ends at last!

Marius, Grantaire, Enjolras, Combeferre, Feuilly, Joly, Lesgles, Courfeyrac:
Red: the blood of angry men! Black: the dark of ages past. Red: the world about to dawn... Black: the night that ends at last!

Ensemble:
Master of the House...

Madame Thenardier:
Master and a half!

Ensemble:
Comforter, philosopher...

Madame Thenardier:
Don't make me laugh!

Ensemble:
Servant to the poor, butler to the great...

Madame Thenardier:
Hypocrite and toady and inebriate!

Madame Thenardier:
Now look who's here! The little madam herself! Pretending once again she's been 'so awfully good.' Better not let me catch you slacking! Better not catch my eye! Ten rotten francs your mother sends me! What is that going to buy? Now take that pail, my little 'Mademoiselle' And go and draw some water from the well! We should never have taken you in in the first place how stupid the things that we do! Like mother like daughter, the scum of the street. Still here, Cosette? Your tears will do you no good! I told you fetch some water from the well in the wood!

Young Cosette:
Please do not send me out alone. Not in the darkness on my own!

Madame Thenardier:
Enough of that, or I'll forget to be nice! You heard me ask for something, And I never ask twice!

Enjolras:
One more day before the storm...

Marius:
Do I follow where she goes?

Enjolras:
...at the barricades of freedom!

Marius:
Shall I join my brothers there?

Enjolras:
When our ranks begin to form...

Marius:
Do I stay, and do I dare?

Enjolras:
...will you take your place with me?

[Fantine has become a prostitute to support her daughter Cosette]

Fantine:
Come on Captain, you can wear your shoes! Don't it make a change to have a girl who can refuse? Easy money, lying on a bed... Just as well they never see the hate that's in your head! Don't they know they're making love to one already dead?

Madame Thenardier:
"Master of the house?"... Isn't worth my spit! "Comforter, philosopher," and lifelong sh*t! Cunning little brain, regular Voltaire. Thinks he's quite a lover - but there's not much there... What a cruel trick of nature, landing me with such a louse. God knows how I've lasted, living with this bastard in the house!

Madame Thenardier:
I used to dream that I would meet a prince, but God almighty, have you seen what's happened since? Master of the House? Isn't worth my spit! Comforter, philosopher, and lifelong sh*t. Cunning little brain, regular Voltaire; thinks he's quite a lover but *there's not much there*. What a cruel trick of nature, landing me with such a louse! God knows how I've lasted living with this bastard in the house.

Enjolras:
With all the anger in the land - how long before the Judgment Day, before we cut the fat ones down to size? Before the barricades arise?

Gavroche:
And little people know, when little people fight, we may look easy pickings but we've got some bite! So never kick a dog because he's just a pup - we'll fight like twenty armies and we won't give up. So you'd better run for cover when the pup grows up!

[During the last battle at the barricades]

Enjolras:
Let others rise to take our place, until the Earth is free!

[Valjean prays to God to save Marius in the battle to come]

Jean Valjean:
Bring him peace, bring him joy... He is young, he is only a boy... You can take, you can give! Let him be, let him live. If I die, let me die! Let him live...

Javert:
Who is this man? What sort of devil is he, to have me caught in a trap and choose to let me go free? It was his hour at last to put the seal on my fate, wipe out the past and wash me clean off the slate! All it would take was a flick of his knife. Vengeance was his and he gave me back my life! Damned if I'll live in the debt of a thief! Damned if I'll yield at the end of the chase! I am the Law and the Law is not mocked. I'll spit his pity right back in his face! There is nothing on Earth that we share! It is either Valjean or Javert! [pause] How can I now allow this man to hold dominion over me? This desperate man whom I have hunted... He gave me my life. He gave me freedom. I should have perished by his hand. It was his right. It was my right to die as well. Instead I live... but live in Hell! And my thoughts fly apart. Can this man be believed? Shall his sins be forgiven? Shall his crimes be reprieved? And must I now begin to doubt, who never doubted all these years? My heart is stone, and still it trembles! The world I have known is lost in shadow. Is he from heaven or from hell? And does he know... that, granting me my life today, this man has killed me, even so? I am reaching... but I fall. And the stars are black and cold, as I stare into the void of a world that cannot hold. I'll escape now from that world, from the world of Jean Valjean. There is nowhere I can turn, there is no way to go on!

Fantine:
Come with me, where chains will never bind you. All your grief at last, at last behind you. Lord in Heaven, look down on him in mercy.

Jean Valjean:
Forgive me all my trespasses and take me to your glory.

Fantine, Eponine:
Take my hand, I'll lead you to salvation. Take my love, for love is everlasting.

Fantine, Jean Valjean, Eponine:
And remember, the truth that once was spoken: to love another person is to see the face of God.

Enjolras:
For your presence of mind, for the deed you have done, I will thank you Monsieur when our battle is won.

Jean Valjean:
Give me no thanks Monsieur, there's something you can do.

Enjolras:
If it is in my power.

Jean Valjean:
Give me the spy Javert, let me take care of him!

Javert:
The law is inside out, the world is upside down!

Enjolras:
Do what you have to do, the man belongs to you! [to the others] The enemy may be regrouping. Hold yourselves in readiness! Come on my friends, back to your positions, the night is falling fast!

Jean Valjean:
[to Javert] We meet again.

Javert:
You've hungered for this all your life! Take your revenge... How right you should kill with a knife!

Jean Valjean:
You talk too much. Your life is safe in my hands!

Javert:
Don't understand.

Jean Valjean:
Get out of here.

Javert:
Valjean, take care, I'm warning you...

Jean Valjean:
Clear out of here!

Javert:
Once a thief, forever a thief. What you want you always steal. You would trade your life for mine? Yes, Valjean, you want a deal. Shoot me now for all I care. If you let me go beware, you'll still answer to Javert!

Jean Valjean:
You are wrong, and always have been wrong. I'm a man, no worse than any man. You are free! And there are no conditions, no bargains or petitions; there's nothing that I blame you for. You've done your duty, nothing more. If I come out of this alive, you'll find me at number fifty-five Rue Plumet. No doubt our paths will cross again. Go.

Javert:
Now bring me prisoner 24601! Your time is up and your parole's begun. You know what that means?

Jean Valjean:
Yes, it means I'm free.

Javert:
No! It means you get your yellow ticket of leave. You are a thief!

Jean Valjean:
I stole a loaf of bread.

Javert:
You robbed a house!

Jean Valjean:
I broke a windowpane. My sister's child was close to death, and we were starving!

Javert:
You will starve again, unless you learn the meaning of the law!

Jean Valjean:
I know the meaning of those nineteen years, a slave of the law!

Javert:
Five years for what you did, the rest because you tried to run; yes, 24601!

Jean Valjean:
My name is Jean Valjean!

Javert:
And I'm Javert. Do not forget my name! Do not forget me, 24601!

Fantine:
He slept a summer by my side, he filled my days with endless wonder. He took my childhood in his stride, but he was gone when autumn came! And still I dream he'll come to me - that we will live the years together. But there are dreams that cannot be, and there are storms we cannot weather.

Cosette:
In my life there are so many questions and answers that somehow seem wrong. In my life there are times when I catch in the silence the sigh of a faraway song, and it sings of a world that I long to see, out of reach, just a whisper away, waiting for me.

Marius:
A ghost, you say? A ghost, maybe. She was just like a ghost to me. One minute there, and she was gone!

Grantaire:
Red...

Marius:
I feel my soul on fire!

Grantaire:
Black...

Marius:
My world if she's not there!

Marius, Grantaire, Enjolras, Combeferre, Feuilly, Joly, Lesgles, Courfeyrac:
Red...

Marius:
The color of desire!

Marius, Grantaire, Enjolras, Combeferre, Feuilly, Joly, Lesgles, Courfeyrac:
Black...

Marius:
The color of despair!

Eponine:
I love him, but everyday I'm learning. All my life, I've only been pretending. Without me his world will go on turning. A world that's full of happiness that I have never known.

Eponine:
Don't you fret, Monsieur Marius, I don't feel any pain. A little fall of rain can hardly hurt me now. You're here... that's all I need to know. And you will keep me safe, and you will keep me close... and rain will make the flowers grow.

Jean Valjean:
[speaking to Javert] You are wrong. And always have been wrong. I'm a man, no worse than any man. You are free, and there are no conditions. No bargains or petitions. There is nothing that I blame you for. You have done your duty, nothing more.

Old Prostitute:
What you think yer at? Hanging round me pitch? If you're new around here, girl you've got a lot to learn!

Lovely Lady:
Listen you old bat... Crazy bloody witch... 'Least I give me customers some pleasure in return!

Old Prostitute:
I know what you give! Give 'em all the pox! Spread around your poison till they end up in a box.

Pimp:
Leave the poor old cow! Move it, Madeleine. She used to be no better till the clap got to her brain.

Ensemble:
When's it gonna end? When we gonna live? Something's gotta happen now or something's gonna give. It'll come, it'll come, it'll come, it'll come, it'll come, it'll come...

Eponine:
On my own, pretending he's beside me. All alone, I walk with him till morning. Without him, I feel his arms around me, and when I lose my way I close my eyes, and he has found me. In the rain, the pavement shines like silver. All the lights are misty in the river. In the darkness, the trees are full of starlight... and all I see is him and me, forever and forever.

Thenardier, Madame Thenardier:
Masters of the land. Always get our share. Clear away the barricades and we're still there! We know where the wind is blowing, money is the stuff we smell, and when we're rich as Croesus, Jesus, won't we see you all in Hell!

Enjolras:
Let's give them a screwing they'll never forget!

Fantine, Eponine:
Take my hand, I'll lead you to salvation. Take my love, for love is everlasting.

Fantine, Eponine, Jean Valjean:
And remember, the truth that once was spoken: To love another person is to see the face of God.

Jean Valjean:
It's you Javert! I knew you wouldn't wait too long. The faithful servant at his post once more! This man's done no wrong, and he needs a doctor's care!

Javert:
I warned you I would not give in. I won't be swayed!

Jean Valjean:
Another hour yet, and then I'm yours, and all our debts are paid!

Javert:
The man of mercy comes again, and talks of justice!

Jean Valjean:
Come, time is running short. Look down, Javert, he's standing in his grave! Give way, Javert! There is a life to save!

Javert:
Take him, Valjean, before I change my mind! I will be waiting, 24601.

Javert:
Honest work, just reward, that's the way to please the Lord.

Thenardier, Madame Thenardier:
Masters of the land, always get our share, clear away the barricades and we're still there! We know where the wind is blowing - money is the stuff we smell! And when we're rich as Croesus, Jesus won't we see you all in Hell!

Javert:
One day more till revolution, we will nip it in the bud, we'll be ready for these schoolboys- they will wet themselves with blood.

Jean Valjean:
[singing] Who am I? Can I conceal myself for evermore? Pretend I'm not the man I was before? And must my name until I die Be no more than an alibi? Must I lie? How can I ever face my fellow men? How can I ever face myself again? My soul belongs to God, I know I made that bargain long ago He gave me hope when hope was gone He gave me strength to journey on Who am I? Who am I? I am Jean Valjean!

Jean Valjean:
One day more. Another day, another destiny, this never-ending road to Calvary. These men who seem to know my crime will surely come a second time. One day more.

Marius:
I did not live until today. How can I live when we are parted?

Jean Valjean:
One day more.

Marius, Cosette:
Tomorrow, you'll be worlds away, and yet with you, my world has started.

Eponine:
One more day all on my own.

Marius, Cosette:
Will we ever meet again?

Eponine:
One more day of him not caring.

Marius, Cosette:
I was born to be with you.

Eponine:
What a life I might have known.

Marius, Cosette:
And I swear, I will be true.

Eponine:
But he never saw me there.

Enjolras:
One more day before the storm.

Marius:
Do I follow where she goes?

Enjolras:
At the barricade of freedom.

Marius:
Do I join my brothers there?

Enjolras:
As our ranks begin to form.

Marius:
Do I stay, and do I care?

Enjolras:
Will you take your place with me? [Chorus joins in] The time is now, the day is here!

Jean Valjean:
One day more!

Javert:
One more day to revolution. We will nip it in the bud. I will join these little schoolboys. They will wet themselves with blood!

Jean Valjean:
One day more!

Thenardier, Madame Thenardier:
Watch 'em run amok. Catch 'em as they fall. Never know your luck when there's a free-for-all. Here, a little dip. There, a little touch. Most of 'em are goners, so they won't miss much! [Chorus joins in] One day to a new beginning, raise the flag of freedom high. Every man will be a king, every man will be a king. There's a new world for the winning, there's a new world to be won. Do you hear the people sing?

Marius:
My place is here. I'll fight with you!

Jean Valjean:
One day more! [everyone sings their previous verses simultaneously] One day more! [Verses continue] Tomorrow, we'll be far away. Tomorrow is the judgment day.

Ensemble:
Tomorrow we'll discover what our God in Heaven has in store. One more dawn, one more day, one day more!

George Ritchie:
Bixby and Ealer now, midnight's as good as daylight for them. If they ain't got a moon to steer by, they use lightnin' bugs.

Bixby:
There she is, boy, the Mississippi, 1200 miles of her, and the whole way is paving stones with the bones of dead steamboats and the reputations of dunderhead pilots!

Sam:
Beauty's fine, Mr. Ealer, I'm all for it. But it just seems to me there's a mighty high discount on it along the Mississippi River.

Ealer:
Not a pilot going, boy, hasn't pondered all that, and doesn't sometimes wonder whether he's gained most or lost most by learning this trade.

Bixby:
When I was a boy, my comrades and I had one permanent ambition - to be a steamboat man. Boy after boy managed to get on the river. By and by I ran away too. Said I could never come home until I was a pilot and come home in glory. I tell you, I love this profession. I take a measureless pride in it. The pilot on a steamboat is the only unfettered, entirely independent human being to walk the face of the earth. She cuts her own course, too, the river. There's a glory to her. She'll take a man any place a man ought to go. She'll kill you, too, if you give her half a chance. I mean to die at the wheel of a steamboat.

Stage Manager:
The day's running down like a tired clock.

Emily:
My, isn't the moonlight terrible?

Mr. Webb:
A man looks pretty small at a wedding, George. All those good women standing shoulder to shoulder making sure the knot's tied in a mighty public way.

Mrs. Soames:
Don't know when I've seen such a lovely wedding. But I always cry. Don't know why it is, but I always cry. I just like to see young people happy, don't you? Oh, I think it's lovely.

Mrs. Soames:
What did she die of, Julia?

Mrs. Gibbs:
In childbirth.

Mrs. Soames:
Childbirth. I'd forgotten all about that. My, wasn't life awful--and wonderful.

Emily:
Oh, Mother Gibbs, I never realized before how troubled and how... how in the dark live persons are. Look at him. I loved him so. From morning till night, that's all they are--troubled.

Emily:
Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it?--every, every minute?

Stage Manager:
No. Saints and poets, maybe--they do some.

George Gibbs:
Emily, if I do change, and make a big improvement... could you be- I mean, would you be-?

Emily Webb:
I already am, George. I always have been.

George Gibbs:
So, I guess this is a pretty important talk we've been having!

Nathan Lane:
I think it's time to bring out Marlon Brando. Mr. Brando, how do you feel the recording session is going?

Matthew Broderick:
[as Brando] What's bein' recorded?

Nathan Lane:
I don't know whether you heard, but we're doing a little show called "The Producers."

Matthew Broderick:
[as Brando] But what are you producin'? Do you produce the laughs? Cheap hackneyed humor for a public which is 'preciated on "droolinphibble."

Nathan Lane:
Well, don't get your kaftan in a twist.

Matthew Broderick:
[as Brando] This kaftan is made entirely of seaweed. Every bit of fabric. It's renewable... renewable and from the sea.

Nathan Lane:
Really.

Matthew Broderick:
[as Brando] I can eat it when I'm done wearin' it.

Nathan Lane:
Here you go. I knew we'd get some entertainment!

Mel Brooks:
See, there were people like Glen Kelly that lived 50, 60 years ago at MGM. They were called Roger Edens.

Mel Brooks:
Bloom goes back to his desk, gets his coat and hat, and then he says, "Wait a minute! Wait a minute! Bialystock was right! There *is* a lot more to me than there is to me!" which doesn't make any sense but it gets a laugh.

Sheriff Ike Vallon:
[offering Ravenal a cigar] See-gar?

Gaylord Ravenal:
[looking at it] What'd you call that?

Sheriff Ike Vallon:
See-gar.

Gaylord Ravenal:
Optimist!

Pete:
Where'd you all get that brooch you're wearing?

Queenie:
You mean this scrumptious piece of jewelry?

Pete:
Where'd you get it, n*gger?

Queenie:
It was give to me.

Pete:
Who give it to yuh?

Queenie:
Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies. [aside] That man - askin' me where I gets my jewelry!

Gaylord Ravenal:
[referring to Parthy] Every time she calls, you jump. Why?

Cap'n Andy Hawks:
Why? [confidentially] That woman's got a mean disposition!

Joe:
[referring to Magnolia] She oughta ask Ol' River what he thinks. He knows all 'bout dem boys. He knows all about everything. [singing] Dere's an ol' man called the Mississippi / Dat's the ol' man dat I'd like to be / What does he care if the world's got troubles? / What does he care if the land ain't free./ Ol' Man River / Dat Ol' Man River / He mus' know sumpin' / But don't say nothin' / He jus'keeps rollin' / He keeps on rollin' along.

Stevedores:
[singing opening lines] Colored folks work on de Mississippi, / Colored folks work while de white folks play; / Loading up boats with the bales of cotton, / Gittin' no rest till de judgement day.

[last lines]

Cap'n Andy Hawks:
[while Joe and chorus are singing the last verse of "Ol' Man River"] If you go up front, you'll find a new water barrel. It ain't much different from the old one.

Magnolia Hawks:
Look Gay, there's Kim! [Kim and Ravenal embrace]

Joe:
[singing with chorus] But Ol' Man River,/ He jes' keeps rollin' along!

Doctor Cukrowicz:
[lighting a table lighter, which flames high] Lord! What a torch!

Violet Venable:
So shines a good deed in a naughty world, Dr. Sugar.

Michael Loomis:
Stay in bed long enough and everyone you ever knew will show up.

Frances Loomis:
[to Michael] When I have breakfast with you, I feel good all day.

McMahon:
Many of the best bars in the city oughta o' turned into a riding academy.

McMahon:
Mr. Grimmet, it is easy to see you are not a drinking man.

Tom Beauchurch:
[to Ginette] I was just wondering... is it too late to learn French?

Ivan Ilyitch Cherdyakhov:
I must go back and tell him what I think of him. The world must be safe so that men of all nations and creeds, regardless of color or religion, will be free to sneeze on their superiors! It is he who will be humiliated by I!

Ivan Ilyitch Cherdyakhov:
What is it? What is it, you ask? You sit there behind your desk and ask what is it? You sit there, in your lofty position as general, and minister of public parks, a member of high standing among the upper class, and ask what is it? You sit there with full knowledge that in this life, there is no equality; that there are those who serve, and those that are served; those who obey, and those that are obeyed; those who bow, and those that are bowed to; that in this life, certain events take place that cause some people to be humiliated, and there are those who are the cause of that humiliation. And still, you ask what is it?

General Brasshilov:
WHAT IS IT?

General Brasshilov:
WHAT IS IT? Don't just sit there jibbering like an idiot! What is it you want?

Phillippe Dupres:
[singing] Love came to me / Gay and tender / Love came to me / Sweet surrender / Love came to me / In bright romantic splendor. / Fickle was she/ Faithful never / Fickle was she / And clever / So will it be / Forever - forever / Softly, as in a morning sunrise / The light of love comes stealing / Into a newborn day.

Barelli:
[explaining the terms of the duel] First they shoot at each with pistols, they have two shots each. Then, if they survive that barrage, they get to use their swords... [turns to Leone] Why don't you just fire at each other with cannons and get it over with?

Leone Gala:
The marquis is too good a fencer - but with a gun, perhaps...

Barelli:
Have you ever seen him shoot? I have! He'll knock the wings off a butterfly at 50 paces! [the conversation continues. Then, suddenly:]

Dr. Spiga:
Excuse me, but where does this butterfly come in?

Muffet DiNicola:
It's debilitating constantly seeing your worth in terms of someone else.

Anthony P. Kirby:
I'm not accustomed to going out to dinner and spending the night in jail.

Grandpa Martin Vanderhof:
Well you have to remember you came on the wrong night. Now tonight I'll bet you nothing will happen... maybe.

Grandpa Martin Vanderhof:
Alice, you're in love with this boy and you're not marrying him because we are the way we are.

Alice Sycamore:
Oh Grandpa.

Grandpa Martin Vanderhof:
I know, you think it wouldn't work out, you think the two families wouldn't get along, well maybe they wouldn't, but whose to say they're right and we're wrong?

Penny Sycamore:
I've got Cynthia just entering the monastery.

Rheba:
She was at the Kit Kat Club wasn't she?

Penny Sycamore:
Well she gets tired of the Kit Kat Club and there's this monastery so she goes there.

Rheba:
Do they let her in?

Penny Sycamore:
Yes, I made it Visitor's Day, so of course anybody can come. She comes and she just stays.

Rheba:
You mean she stays all night?

Penny Sycamore:
Oh yes, she stays six years.

Rheba:
Six years? I'll bet she busts that monastery wide open.

Grand Duchess Olga Katrina:
That manager, he doesn't like me, he's a Communist.

Tony Kirby:
I wouldn't trade one minute of this evening for all the rice in China.

Alice Sycamore:
Is there much rice in China?

Tony Kirby:
Didn't you read "The Good Earth"?

Penny Sycamore:
You'd think with 1 girl and 40 monks, something would happen.

Penny Sycamore:
Rheba, I think I'm going to put this play away for a while and go back to the war play.

Rheba:
Oh I always liked that one, the war play! A BOOM! A BOOM!

Tony Kirby:
My father raises orchids at $10,000 a bulb, does that sound logical? My mother studies spiritualism, that's just as bad as your mother typing plays.

Alice Sycamore:
Your mother studies spiritualism because it's fashionable and your father raises orchids because he can afford to. My mother types plays because 8 years ago a typewriter was delivered here by accident.

Grandpa Martin Vanderhof:
Well sir, you should've been there, that's all I can say, you should've been there.

Penny Sycamore:
Don't the graduates get to say anything, Grandpa?

Grandpa Martin Vanderhof:
Oh no, they just sit there in their cap and nightgown, have a diploma handed to them and along 40 years from now suddenly say 'where am I?'

Penny Sycamore:
[reading from one of her plays] Kenneth, my virginity is a priceless thing to me.

Grandpa Martin Vanderhof:
Have you been acting long?

Gay Wellington:
All my life, I've played everything. Ever see 'Peg O' My Heart'?

Grandpa Martin Vanderhof:
Yes!

Gay Wellington:
I saw it too, good show.

Penny Sycamore:
[Gay Wellington is passed out drunk] Do you think she'll be alright, Grandpa?

Grandpa Martin Vanderhof:
Yes but I wouldn't cast her in the religious play.

Grandpa Martin Vanderhof:
Penny, if I were you, the next time I met an actress on the top of a bus, I think I'd MAIL them the play instead of bringing them home to read it.

Gay Wellington:
My, hot night, ain't it?

Donald:
You want me to open the window, Miss Wellington?

Gay Wellington:
Na, hell with the weather.

Grandpa Martin Vanderhof:
[to Mr. Kirby] Oh, that's just the Grand Duchess Olga Katrina. She's cooking the dinner.

Grand Duchess Olga Katrina:
[to Grandpa] Before I make the blintzes, how many will there be for dinner?

Grandpa Martin Vanderhof:
Well, I'd make quite a stack, your Highness, you can never tell.

Grand Duchess Olga Katrina:
[smiles] Good! The Czar, he always said to me, "Olga... do not be stingy with the blintzes!"