In-Laws

Sheldon:
Did we hit the little boy on Sixth Avenue?

Vince Ricardo:
No, we missed him by a good foot and a half.

Sheldon:
Six thousand a year tuition to listen to this.

Sheldon:
The ocean? It's over the ocean to Scranton, Pennsylvania?

Vince Ricardo:
Just go with the flow, Shel, just go with the flow.

Sheldon:
What flow? There isn't any flow.

Vince Ricardo:
Sometimes I'm so smart I scare myself.

Sheldon:
There's no reason to shoot at me, I'm a dentist.

Sheldon:
You were involved in the Bay of Pigs?

Vince Ricardo:
Involved? That was my idea.

Tommy:
Dad and his mysterious phone calls.

Vince Ricardo:
What the hell do you mean by that?

Tommy:
Nothing. You're just always making these weird calls in back rooms and pay booths...

Vince Ricardo:
You little snot-nose! Those phone calls put you through college!

Vince Ricardo:
I was in the jungle - the bush we called it - for approximately nine months...

Sheldon:
Nine months! That must have really been something!

Vince Ricardo:
It was. I saw things... They have tsetse flies down there the size of eagles.

Vince Ricardo:
Are you interested in joining? The benefits are terrific. The trick is not to get killed. That's really the key to the benefit program.

Vince Ricardo:
You know, I'm such a great driver, it's incomprehensible that they took my license away.

Sheldon:
I have flames on my car. I HAVE FLAMES ON MY CAR!

Vince Ricardo:
Serpentine Shelly. Serpentine!

Vince Ricardo:
Son, do you remember when we use to play ball on Nagle Avenue?

Tommy:
No dad, we talked about playing ball on Nagle Avenue, but we never did.

Sheldon:
I've only had four women in my life. Two of them, my wife!

General Garcia:
We have no blindfolds senor, we are a poor country!

Vince Ricardo:
Serpentine, Shel! Serpentine!

General Garcia:
I am a pacifist by nature with a deep Quaker belief in the sanctity of human life. I wish I had a choice but to kill you.

Sheldon:
Please God, don't let me die on West 31st Street!