Lilo & Stitch: The Series

[Jumba and Peakley in another costume theme]

Pleakley:
Don't we look marvelous?

Jumba:
Frankly, my dear, I do not give darn.

Jumba:
Ha! The bigger they are, the more their landing.

Pleakley:
Or, something very close to that.

Nani:
I promise to never let work keep me away from you again.

Lilo:
Okay! And I promise never to become a fugitive from justice again!

Pleakley:
Who knew Armageddon could be so barbecue-tasty!

[about Spooky]

Jumba:
Ooooh. I hope it doesn't come here. His impression of ex-wife is very scary!

[lining up to play baseball]

Jumba:
Uh, one question: If we win, do losers have to be our slaves for life?

Lilo:
Of course not!

Jumba:
[shrugs] Is how we play team sports on my home world!

Gantu:
Follow the bouncing abomination...

Lilo:
Stitch! Are you okay?

Stitch:
I'm okay. I'm fluffy!

[shopping for a Christmas present]

Nani:
Hi, I'm looking for something like a shrunken head...

Store Clerk:
Sorry, shrunken heads aren't part of Hawaii's cultural heritage. Try South America.

Lilo:
Jumba, are you okay?

Jumba:
I am okay! I landed on my patooki!

[after waking up]

Gantu:
You LASERED my PATOOKI?

Experiment 625:
Ah, I just thought it could use a makeover. Actually, it's an amazing likeness of, ah, moi. You wanna see?

[after blasting into a building and frightening a crowd of people]

Gantu:
People of Earth! Do not be alarmed! I am just looking for an abomination!

[after finding sandwiches stored in his experiment containment unit]

Gantu:
SANDWICHES? Oh, when I get back, 625 is fin... hmm, bacon and raisin! Just like "Mu-mu" used to make!

Pleakley:
Jumba, you're messing up my decorative orbs!

Jumba:
Well, you are standing in two of my eyes!

[mooning experiment 627]

Stitch:
Oh douga mee patooki!

Nani:
[rushing into the kitchen after Pleakly mops the floor] WHERE'S LILO?

Pleakley:
Well a clean floor was here, but apparently it just left!

Mertle Edmonds:
[about Cannonball] Why's he got such a big caboose?

Lilo:
Highly contagious butt rabies.

[Girls scatter]

Pleakley:
[trying to stall an angry crowd] Everyone loves balloon animals! [holds one up] See? It's a little... puppy!... with three heads

[repeated line]

Gantu:
Oh, Blitznak!

Experiment 625:
Uh-oh, plot twist!

H?msterviel:
Well? Where is my big bug?

Gantu:
I'm afraid the little girl and the abomination...

H?msterviel:
AGAIN? You, with your stomping feet and shooting blasters, cannot get ONE experiment FROM A LITTLE GIRL? Tell me how lame you are! TELL ME!

625:
Oh, there's no right answer to that. I'd put it around the "S"s, between "shockingly lame" and "stunningly lame".

Pleakley:
[giving the family an earthquake brief] Now, the important thing is not to panic. Don't panic. [obviously panicking] Don't panic! DON'T PANIC!

Jumba:
I am thinking... you are panicking.

Pleakley:
[after Stitch poured water on him] Now, where was I?

Lilo:
You were telling us not to panic while you were panicking.

Stitch:
Stitch not bad! Was scary dolly!

Wendy Pleakley:
I've researched winter Earth holidays like Kwanzaa, Christmas, Chanukah, and the year-end clearance sale at Mendelton's department store.

Lilo:
I don't think that last one's a holiday.

Wendy Pleakley:
If 50% off everything isn't a holiday, sister, I don't know what is!

Lilo:
Every year, Nani hides our Christmas presents. It's my job as a little sister to find them. It's another Hawaiian Christmas tradition!

Pleakley:
So you claim to have been sleeping the whole time. Nice alibi. By the way, I'm being sarcastic.

Lilo:
Yay for extraterrestrial puppy!

Gantu:
Hairball, I am captain ahem, former of the galactic alliance, you will not escape me! [looks down and sees three boys] I mean I um missed my bus.

Nani:
Starving yourself won't bring him back, Lilo.

Lilo:
But If I show up at the tea party tomorrow without Mr. Stenchy, they won't be my friends anymore.

Nani:
Lilo, if they only liked you because you had a cute pet, then who needs them? You have to trust your real friends.

Lilo:
Who would that be?

Nani:
Stitch, for one. He's a royal pain, but he's loyal, and he'd never ever ever do anything that would hurt you. Thats a true friend.

Lilo:
I know, Stitch is the best. I wouldn't trade him for anything or anybody.

Mertle Edmonds:
How could she win? She's so weird, and I'm so normal!

Nani:
All the mail seems to be for you Pleakley. They are all bills!

Pleakley:
Bills? What are bills?

Nani:
Bills are what you owe when you charge on your 28 credit cards!

Pleakley:
Owe? As in... money?

[Pleakley opens an envelope]

Pleakley:
Oh my gosh! Is this a balance due or an intergalatic zip code! How could they do this to me? I'm not even a citizen!

Experiment 625:
Hey! You didn't even see my sandwich trap! That took me like one minute to build!

Lilo:
Stitch! Are you okay?

Stitch:
[dazed from a fight] Jumba?

Lilo:
Close.

Gantu:
I will not be made a fool of!

625:
Too late.

625:
See? Look at what we can do if we work together.

Lilo:
Yeah, except you didn't do anything!

Experiment 625:
Note to self - Only open mouth to insert sandwiches.

Nani:
Are you LOLO?

Lilo:
But Pleakley won't be my babysitter anymore!

Nani:
You'll still have your uncle Jumba. I'm not going to be Pleakleys fiance!

Lilo:
Fine. Jumba passes as a great babysitter! Jumba! Can I play with the chainsaw?

Jumba:
Sure! Don't get fingers stuck! Could be messy!

Lilo:
I can't dance... not without Stitch.

Stitch:
Ohana!

Lilo:
Ohana means family. Family means LEAVE ME ALONE WHILE I PRACTICE MY HULA DANCE!

Jumba:
Hello! We come in peace to blow up your home!

Lilo:
I hope our new planet will have this many stars. And a beach with rockin' waves. And fish that eat peanut butter sandwiches.

625:
[singing] On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love sent to me... A SANDWICH!

Woman:
Is the hotel melting?

Man:
They'd better give us a discount!

Pleakley:
Did I say Time Machine? I meant Rhyme Machine! Helps you bust a funky rhyme! "My name is Pleakley and I got some style, from my dress to my shoes to my bathroom towel!"

Jumba:
What are you doing here?

Future Jumba:
I have come to give you warning. Whatever you do, do not build robot wife. Is too easy for them to hack into bank account.

Jumba:
Little girl! 626!

Tiffany:
You know these two?

Jumba:
Yes!

Pleakley:
No!

Tiffany:
Well, which is it?

Jumba:
Erm... what was the question again?

Lilo:
602's out there, and there's NO WAY to stop it. Kinda like when my sister's eating chocolate!

Nosy:
Ratface!

H?msterviel:
What?

Nosy:
Hamsterjerk!

H?msterviel:
What?

Nosy:
Kiesterviel!

H?msterviel:
WHAT?

Nosy:
You want I should repeat them?

Pleakley:
We can't let her go alone! Hamsterviel is dangerous! And we're baby-sitting!

Jumba:
You have a point. Big sister's wrath is more dangerous than Hamsterviel.

Jumba:
Two experiments are about to engage in epic battle and I forgot to bring camera.

625:
I think I've figured out your problem.

Gantu:
Really? What is it?

625:
Simple. You're a pathetic loser.

Pleakley:
I am now going to make the lighthouse disappear... How you ask? I have absolutely no idea.

Pleakley:
Will this hurt?

Jumba:
Not to worry. This won't hurt at all.

[Jumba injects Lilo and Stitch into Pleakley's bloodstream]

Pleakley:
OWWWW! You said it wouldn't hurt!

Jumba:
Is not hurting me.

Jumba:
Good news, Pleakley, you're not sick!

Pleakley:
Thank goodness!

Jumba:
You just have a genetic experiment inside you that we need to get out.

Pleakley:
Un-thank goodness.

Pleakley:
I think Lilo has learned the importance of being clean. But not too clean! Not overly obsessively clean like some people.

Nani:
What are you, an after school special?

Pleakley:
Gimme an S! S! Gimme an M! M! Gimme a Y! Y! Gimme a Z! Z! Gimme another Z! Z! Gimme another Y! Y! Gimme an X! X! What does that spell? Smyzzyx!

Lilo:
Smyzzyx?

Pleakley:
It means "Kick their butt!" in Slorganac.

Lilo:
Do you think that rocked?

Keoni Jameson:
Do you think it rocked?

Lilo:
Umm... Yeah?

Keoni Jameson:
Then I think it rocked!

Lilo:
Are you okay?

Keoni Jameson:
Do you want me to be okay?

Lilo:
Umm... Yeah?

Keoni Jameson:
Then I'm okay!

Lilo:
You're sure not acting okay.

Pleakley:
Has it ever occured to you that there might be a better way to turn evil expirements to good?

Jumba:
Better than untested hazardous technology? Impossible, no such thing exists.

Pleakley:
Well, Mr. I'm-such-a-super-genius-I-think-I-know-everything-and-never-give-my-roomate-any-credit-even-when-he's-right-especially-about-wearing-white-after-Labor-day...

Lilo:
We need alien geniuses on our team.

Jumba:
Then why do we have Pleakley?

Pleakley:
HEY!

Lilo:
I wish someone smarter than me was playing.

Pleakley:
Don't you worry. I stood up all night studying the difference between Argyle and Gargoyle!

Lilo:
We're doomed!

Pleakley:
This is supposed to be like one of those painful parting plane scenes from Earth movies.

Jumba:
Being with ugly wife already plenty painful.

Lilo:
I'm gonna name him Shoe.

Pleakley:
Why? Because his horse-shoe shaped head?

Lilo:
No, I just noticed he isn't wearing shoes.

Nani:
I just put new batteries in this clock. How is it slow?

Lilo:
Stitch set it to Planet Turo time. They're 438 hours behind.

Jumba:
Once he even sold my wife for 10 Kweltikwans!

Lilo:
That is evil.

Jumba:
Yes, but it was smart. She was only worth 5.

Nani:
When you're as old as I am, you can stay out late too.

Lilo:
But that's about 100 years from now! I can't wait that long!

Nani:
Exactly. How old do you think I am?

Lilo:
Old enough to have all the fun!

Lilo:
Wanna play Battle of the Greek City-States? Stitch and me can be the fierce Spartans, and you can be the decadent Athenians.

Pleakley:
Henry VIII was a powerful ruler, even though he had a nasty habit of having his wives beheaded.

Jumba:
I am liking this Henry person.

Gantu:
[after being berated by Hamsterviel *again*] I hate my life.

Pleakley:
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you... unless they are carved into stone and thrown at you.

Gantu:
[625 is trying to eat giant sandwich] You could never fit that thing in your mouth!

Experiment 625:
I'm willin' to die tryin'!

Gantu:
[after experiment 297 gets away] You could have tried to help me!

Experiment 625:
What, and drop all my plushies?

Gantu:
[looks from shrinking device to 625] He he he.

Experiment 625:
I hate it when you look at me like that.

Gantu:
[625 as a giant steps over Jumba, Pleakley, Lilo and Stitch] You fool, you missed!

Experiment 625:
Oh, no, I never miss! [heads for giant sandwich]

Jumba:
Open this door or I'll obliterate you and ridiculous ohana!

Lilo:
[to baby Nani in dryer] Nani! How many times have you told me not to play in the dryer!

Experiment 625:
[after letting experiment turn Gantu into baby] Sorry. Gee, I couldn't resist. I always wondered if he started out as a guppy or a tadpole. It turns out it was just another form of ugly.

Pleakley:
[as a baby] I made oops in my pants.

Experiment 625:
[Baby Jumba gets bounced up a slide and falls off the back] Careful, little googoo, don't hurt the poor innocent slide.

Lilo:
Jumba, quit playing with Jumba's computer, you're going to wreck it!

Lilo:
[Jumba's found the antidote recipe on his laptop] But how did...

Baby Jumba:
[laugh] Evil genius child prodigy.

Jumba:
Since buggy was stolen, you'll need another form of transportation.

Pleakley:
[Pulls back cover to reveal vehicle] A federation police cruiser?

Stitch:
The red one!

Jumba:
[laughs] Ii. Is the one 626 took on his original escape to earth.

Lilo:
I don't want to be stuck as Jake Long! He's some kind of wierdo who thinks he's hunting magical creatures!

Lilo:
We have to get Experiment 316 back, or I'll be Jake Long, forever!

Jake Long:
Astroids? Space ships? The Am Drag protects magical creatures. It's not Sci-fi.

625:
What is that?

Gantu:
It's a little beddie weddie for his little nappie wappie poo.

625:
I think I'm going to be sickie wickie poo.

Gantu:
You're not jealous are you?

625:
Jealous! No! All this sugar just makes me queasy.

Stitch:
[ready to fight] Agata!

625:
Aww, do we have to do this now? I just ate!

Stitch:
[moving toward him] Agata!

625:
Gantu! Trog in the house! [Stitch throws him] I could do that move too, if I wasn't so bloated.

Lilo:
You're cuter than anything on Earth. Except maybe a potato bug.

Jumba:
Am going to make a rocket and tonight, we blast him into space!

Lilo:
But I need him to go to the FHGH tea party.

Jumba:
[sigh] Fine. Go to alphabet party. But as soon as rocket's ready, we'll blast him into space.

Mertle Edmonds:
Lilo, you get one more chance to be in the FHGH. Tomorrow, bring Mr. Stenchy. But leave your disconfigured dog at home!

Lilo:
[staring at a picture of her parents] I miss you.

Hula Teacher:
Where is the Eiffel Tower located?

Teresa:
[giving the answer to Mertle but becomes dumb after spike hugs her] In the bathroom!

Mertle:
In the bathroom.

Lilo:
Paris France.

Hula Teacher:
Where is the Eiffel Tower located?

Teresa:
[giving the answer to Mertle but becomes dumb after spike hugs her] In the bathroom!

Mertle:
In the bathroom.

Lilo:
Paris, France.

Experiment 625:
You're not Santa Clause! Your not even a Clause!

Pleakley:
Never talk to rangers.

Nani:
You mean strangers!

Pleakley:
But strangers are the most interesting people to talk to!