Little Monsters

Tommy Connor:
[watching Gypo drink whiskey] You've eradicated the whole bottle!

Maurice:
Baseball cards? I LOVE baseball cards! -Got 'em, got 'em, need 'em got 'em, got 'em got 'em, need 'em, got 'em, need 'em, need 'em, got 'em, need 'em, need 'em got 'em, got 'em need 'em!

Brian Stevenson:
Dad! A MONS... ter.

Glen Stevenson:
What are you doing Brian? What the hell is going on? Look at this mess. [Lifts his foot] What the hell am I stepping in? Doritos? Jesus...!

Brian Stevenson:
I'll clean it up.

Glen Stevenson:
You're damn right you will! Now get back in that bed Mr!

Brian Stevenson:
Wait, Dad there was a *monster* here. You've *gotta* believe me!

Glen Stevenson:
Brian, it's a pile of clothes! You're wrestling a pile of clothes! [Brian smiles softly] What's so funny? [Brian looks at his dad and his smile instantly fades]

Maurice:
We're the reasons why brothers hate their sisters!

Maurice:
[after peeing in Ronny's apple juice] Ronny's gonna be pissed!

monster:
Trick or treat, smell my feet!

Maurice:
We take the sh*t, we smash the sh*t, and then we put the sh*t back.

Maurice:
You got your stupid remote control back. Now how about lighting a candle or something? These lights are painful.

Brian Stevenson:
[studies remote] Hey, what about the batteries?

Maurice:
I ate 'em for breakfast. I'd give 'em to ya right now but double A battries constipate me, ok? How bout a little later?

Brian Stevenson:
That's gross.

Maurice:
Ooh, let me get it. [picks Brian's nose] Hmm yum, you know I thought it would be good but it's snot. Ha Ha!

Maurice:
A man's best friend, His right hand.

Maurice:
Don't worry it's just a drill!

Maurice:
Ow! Window pane

Ronnie Coleman:
Who put piss in my apple juice?

Brian Stevenson:
We're in somebody elses house!

Maurice:
No! Duh! Well, where did you park your squad car, Dick Tracy?