Milton the Monster

["Milton the Monster" title sequence]

Narrator:
On top of old Horror Hill, in a secret laboratory, Professor Weirdo and Count Kook were in their monstrous glory.

Professor Weirdo:
# Six drops of The Essence of Terror, / Five drops of Sinister Sauce. #

Count Kook:
# When the stirring's done, may I lick the spoon? #

Professor Weirdo:
# Of course! A-ha! Of course! / Now for the tincture of tenderness, / But I must use only a touch. / For without a touch of tenderness, / It might destroy me! #

[Kook accidentally knocks Weirdo's arm]

Professor Weirdo:
# Oops! Too much! / Better hold your breath; / It's starting to tick! #

Count Kook:
# Better hold my hand; / I'm feeling sick! #

[the monster arises]

Milton The Monster:
Hello, Daddy!

Professor Weirdo:
# What have I done? #

Milton The Monster:
# I'm Milton, your brand new son! #

Milton the Monster:
Over my dead body, Professor.

Professor Weirdo:
That's the most intelligent suggestion you've ever made.