My Bloody Valentine

Michael:
Jason, is that you?

Irene:
I am no hooker.

Frank the Trucker:
[tossing her a $20 bill] You are now.

Burke:
[to a crime scene corpse] Happy f***ing Valentine's Day.

Ben Foley:
Eloquent, Sheriff. You make us look like an inbred mining community.

Axel Palmer:
We are an inbred mining community, Ben.

Megan:
Wait! I'm kinda p*ssy sometimes.

Sarah Palmer:
[anxiously] Welcome to the club.

Deputy Ferris:
You wanna take point?

Burke:
[after long pause] I'm retired.

Officer Hinch:
[looking at a candy box with a human heart inside] Think I waited too long to retire.

Burke:
You and me both, Hinch. Who did this?

Officer Hinch:
Harry Warden.

Burke:
Harry Warden's in a coma.

Officer Hinch:
Guess he woke up.

Ben Foley:
[drunk] Damn Harry Warden. Got me aiming at shadows.

Axel Palmer:
Hey, you missed me on TV.

Sarah Palmer:
Oh, yes! That's right! How was he?

Ben Foley:
When you gonna dump this bum and run away with me?

Sarah Palmer:
I get off work at 8.

Ben Foley:
Well, I'll be sure to tuck the top down the top on my Cadillac.

[after hearing a noise in the shop]

Sarah Palmer:
Did you lock the front?

[pause]

Megan:
Yes...

Axel Palmer:
[about Tom] Well, the love of your life may be involved in some very deep sh*t.

Sarah Palmer:
He's not the love of my life.

Axel Palmer:
No? You left this on the dresser.

[Axel holds up an old photograph of Sarah and Tom from when they were dating]

Tom Hanniger:
What were you doing at the mine earlier?

Deputy Martin:
I was doing my job.

Tom Hanniger:
Oh.

Deputy Martin:
You're the suspect. Not me.

[Jason scares Sarah in the mine]

Jason:
What, you think I was Harry Warden or something? Hey, Michael, check this out.

[Harry Warden strikes Jason from behind, killing him with a pick axe]

Tom Hanniger:
I know my job, Harry.

Harry Warden:
Like f*** you do, Hanniger. Just 'cause your daddy owns the mine doesn't mean you know sh*t.

Tom Hanniger:
[trembling] He's here! Harry Warden is here!

Sarah Palmer:
Tom... Harry's not here.

Axel Palmer:
No... wait. Harry is here... isn't he? [to Tom] Are you there, Harry? You living inside Tom? Huh? Are you in there?

Tom Hanniger:
[breaking character; gruff voice] Oh... I'm right here.

Axel Palmer:
I f***ing knew it!

Red:
[talking to a co-worker on the phone] Well, you know what? You couldn't find your ass with both hands.

Axel Palmer:
[viewing Irene's mutilated body] Jesus, Irene. He took your heart.

Deputy Martin:
Jilted lover with a screw loose?

Axel Palmer:
More than one screw, wouldn't you say? Irene never did the jilting.

Burke:
I just saved your ass, Hanniger. For the second time. But don't you worry, kiddo. There won't be a third.

Tom Hanniger:
Good.