Nothing

Dave:
We can't be dead. We have cable.

Andrew:
Maybe we slipped into another dimension.

Dave:
There has to be something to eat.

Andrew:
Like through a portal or something.

Dave:
There's nothing to eat!

Andrew:
A space-time continuum.

Dave:
Where's the food?

Andrew:
A black hole, or a red dwarf. Time warp! Maybe we fell into some sort of time warp. Abducted! Yes! Maybe that's it, we were abducted by aliens!

Andrew:
And they've taken us back to their planet and put us in some kind of zoo with a sign that said, "Don't feed the humans," which is crazy, because we'll die, and who's gonna want to go to the zoo to see two dead humans? Unless they're going to eat us, but why wouldn't they want to fatten us up before the slaughter? Unless they're feeding us, and we just don't know it! Or they're not feeding us and they're just waiting and watching to see how we'll react, what we'll do! What are you doing?

Dave:
I'm making a trap!

Andrew:
For what?

Dave:
The food! The food, you idiot, the food!

Andrew:
Oh my God, we're going to die.

Dave:
For once, I don't think you're overreacting.

Andrew:
Hey!

Dave:
Oh, sorry.

Andrew:
You did that on purpose!

Dave:
What do you mean?

Andrew:
I was just about to beat you for the first time, and you shut off the game!

Dave:
No I didn't.

Andrew:
Yes you did!

Dave:
Well, it was an accident.

Andrew:
I - I can't believe this! I was gonna win!

Dave:
Fine, you want to play again?

Andrew:
Fine! Let's play again!

Dave:
Well, not if you're gonna be like that.

Dave:
Bye-bye, Andrew's thing on the floor next to the thing with the thing in it!

Dave:
I'm not mad at you. You want to know why? Because I hated it away. Because this is stupid. I mean, we've been friends for 21 years. I don't want to be mad at you. I don't want you to be mad at me. I want us to have fun. I want us to be happy. And I think we can. I mean, I'm out there and I'm all pissed off at you, and then I was like, well, f*** it! We can do whatever we want, right? So I say, f*** being mad with each other. So what do you say? Why don't you take whatever it is that's bothering you about me and just hate it away?

Andrew:
Because I don't want to.

Dave:
What do you mean? Why not?

Andrew:
Because this is something I want to remember.

Dave:
Why?

Andrew:
Because you're the type of person who abandons his best friend, and that's something I don't want to forget.

Dave:
F*** you! Sh*t, now I'm mad again.