Offside

Mrs. Caruso:
[First lines] Frank! Wake up! I need you to take me to church!

Frank Caruso:
This is Total Football. Each line has its own poetry. But it's not until you put it all together that its true form emerges. At that point, each note in counterpoint complements every other note perfectly. You create beauty. That's how we have to play.

Frank Caruso:
Winning is the root of many evils.

Frank Caruso:
It's not about winning. It's the about the pursuit of excellence.

Frank Caruso:
They're an English team. They speak of the mid-field, but they know not what the mid-field is.

Shakira:
[to Frank] Haven't you ever seen a naked woman before?

Frank Caruso:
What's it like working with those guys?

Sarah:
Like a cartoon version of The Sopranos.

Katie Wilson:
Do you know what I do?

Charlie Caruso:
Yeah. You're in real estate, marketing.

Katie Wilson:
No, I'm a dancer, an exotic dancer... a stripper.

Frank Caruso:
We need mud!

Frank Caruso:
Today, I killed my own mother.

Katie Wilson:
Little kiss, first, to see what you're like.

Frank Caruso:
Football is life. Everything else is a mere detail.

Mark:
[Last words] When I'm back from my run, we'll go for a coffee, all right?

Frank Caruso:
Sounds good.

Mark:
Good man.

Frank Caruso:
Go hard.

Frank Caruso:
Today's problem was not physical; today's problem was mental.

Charlie Caruso:
Today's problem was we lost!

Mark:
We're winners, Frank!

Frank Caruso:
At what are we winners, Mark?

Charlie Caruso:
How was Holland?

Leechy:
Good league, good money, fantastic women.

Charlie Caruso:
Good drugs too, from what I heard.

Charlie Caruso:
You bring food?

Mark:
It's a party, they provide the food. What's wrong with these Australians?

Frank Caruso:
Today's problem was not physical; today's problem was mental.

Mrs. Caruso:
Today's problem was we lost!

Shakira:
We're winners, Frank!

Frank Caruso:
At what are we winners, Mark?

Mrs. Caruso:
How was Holland?

Leechy:
Good league, good money, fantastic women.

Mrs. Caruso:
Good drugs too, from what I heard.

Mrs. Caruso:
You bring food?

Shakira:
It's a party, they provide the food. What's wrong with these Australians?

Frank Caruso:
What's it like working with those guys?

Katie Wilson:
Like a cartoon version of The Sopranos.

Leechy:
Do you know what I do?

Mrs. Caruso:
Yeah. You're in real estate, marketing.

Leechy:
No, I'm a dancer, an exotic dancer... a stripper.

Leechy:
Charlie and Katie: onside. Charlie and other girls: offside. Katie-good-girl: onside. Katie-stripper: offside.

Mrs. Caruso:
I need sex!

Leechy:
Little kiss, first, to see what you're like.

Shakira:
[Last words] When I'm back from my run, we'll go for a coffee, all right?

Frank Caruso:
Sounds good.

Shakira:
Good man.

Frank Caruso:
Go hard.