Once Upon a Time in Hollywood

Rick Dalton:
Hey! You're a good friend, Cliff.

Cliff Booth:
I try.

Bruce Lee:
You know, you're kinda pretty for a stuntman.

Cliff Booth:
That's what they tell me.

Bruce Lee:
You're the one with the big mouth, and I would really enjoy closing it, especially in front of all my friends. But my hands are registered as lethal weapons. That means, we get into a fight, I accidentally kill you? I go to jail.

Cliff Booth:
Anybody accidentally kills anybody in a fight, they go to jail. It's called manslaughter.

Randy Miller:
What's up, babe?

Janet Miller:
What's up, Randy, is that your loser arsehole, wife-killing buddy boy here was beating the sh*t out of Bruce!

Randy Miller:
What?

Cliff Booth:
Hey, Randy.

Randy Miller:
Cliff! What the f***, man!

Bruce Lee:
Let me just say, nobody beat the sh*t out of Bruce. It was a friendly contest. He barely touched me.

Cliff Booth:
I think that dent in the car says something different.

Janet Miller:
[looks past Cliff and Bruce] Oh...my God! What the f*** did you do to my car!?

Randy Miller:
What the f*** did you do to her car?

Cliff Booth:
[gestures to Bruce] threw this little prick into it, but I did not know it was her car.

Janet Miller:
[to Cliff, angry] Get the wardrobe off, get your sh*t and get f***ed!

Randy Miller:
Janet!

Janet Miller:
What?

Randy Miller:
I will handle this!

Janet Miller:
Then f***ing handle it, Randy!

Randy Miller:
[to Cliff, calmly] Cliff, get the wardrobe off, get your sh*t and get off the lot.

Rick Dalton:
All right, that's too hot. Anything we can do about that heat?

Flamethrower Trainer:
Rick, it's a flamethrower.

Allen Kincade:
So, uh, Rick, explain to the audience exactly what it is a stunt double does.

Rick Dalton:
Well, actors are required to do a lot of dangerous stuff. Say Jake Cahill gets shot off his horse. Now, can I fall off a horse? Yes, I can. Yes, I have. [all three chuckle] But say I fall off wrong and I sprain my wrist or twist my ankle. Now, that can put an undue burden on the production because now maybe I can't work for a week. So Cliff here is meant to help carry the load.

Allen Kincade:
Is that, uh, how you'd describe your job, Cliff?

Cliff Booth:
What, carrying his load? Yeah, that's about right.

Cliff Booth:
All right. What's the matter, partner?

Rick Dalton:
It's official, old buddy. I'm a has-been.

Pussycat:
Want me to suck your cock while you're driving?

Cliff Booth:
[thinks for a bit] How old are you?

Pussycat:
What?

Cliff Booth:
How old are you?

Pussycat:
Wow, man. First time anybody asked that in a long time.

Cliff Booth:
What's the answer?

Pussycat:
Okay, we gonna play kiddie games? Eighteen. Feel better?

Cliff Booth:
You got some I.D., you know, like, a driver's license or something?

Pussycat:
[laughing] Are you joking?

Cliff Booth:
No, I'm not. I need to see something official that verifies that you're eighteen, which you don't have because you're not.

Gypsy:
Welcome to our community.

Cliff Booth:
Thanks for having me.

Gypsy:
And thanks for giving our precious P*ssy a ride home.

Cliff Booth:
Think nothing of it.

Gypsy:
We love P*ssy.

Cliff Booth:
Yes, we do.

Cliff Booth:
If something were to happen to my boss's car, well, I'd get in trouble. Lucky for you, he's got a spare. [pulls out the spare tire, car jack, and lug wrench] Fix it!

Clem:
[laughs] F*** you!

[Cliff advances toward Clem and punches him square in the face, knocking him down. Cliff then pulls Clem up by his hair and punches him again, before pulling him back up and looking toward the Family]

Cliff Booth:
Ladies. [punches Clem in the face again, before the Family members start advancing toward him.] Come one step closer, and I knock his teeth out! [hauls Clem to his feet and throws him against Rick’s car] Fix it.

Clem:
Can I at least get a rag to wipe my face first?

Cliff Booth:
Nope. Tire first.

Cliff Booth:
Oh, I know you. I know all three of you! Yeah, Spahn Ranch! Spahn Ranch, yeah! Woo! [turns to Katie] I don't know your name, but I remember that hair. [turns to Sadie] And you, I remember your white little face. [turns to Tex] And you were on a horsey! Yeah... you are?

Tex:
I'm the Devil. And I'm here to do the Devil's business.

Cliff Booth:
...Nah, it was dumber than that. Something like Rex.

Sadie:
God, shoot him, Tex!

Cliff Booth:
Tex!

Cliff Booth:
[high on acid] You are real, right?

Tex:
I'm as real as a donut, motherf***er.

Jay Sebring:
Is everybody okay?

Rick Dalton:
Well... the f***in' hippies aren't. That's for goddamn sure.

Rick Dalton:
My buddy and his dog killed two of them and, no sh*t, I torched the last one.

Jay Sebring:
Torched?

Rick Dalton:
Yeah, I burnt her ass to a crisp.

Rick Dalton:
What the hell are you looking at, you little ginger-haired f***er?

Rick Dalton:
[in character on "Lancer"] To my wife and all my sweethearts. May they never meet.

Rick Dalton:
[during a scene in "The 14 Fists of McCluskey" when his character burns several Nazis alive with a flamethrower] Anybody order fried sauerkraut? Burn, you Nazi bastards! Ha ha ha!

Rick Dalton:
I could be one pool party away from starring in a Polanski movie!

Rick Dalton:
You f***in' hippies came up here to smoke dope on a dark road, huh?

Cliff Booth:
Don't cry in front of the Mexicans.

Cliff Booth:
Hey! You're Rick f***ing Dalton. Don't you forget it.

Narrator:
When you come to the end of the line, with a buddy who is more than a brother and a little less than a wife, getting blind drunk together is really the only way to say farewell.

Marvin Schwarz:
So Rick, who's gonna kick the sh*t out of you next week? Mannix? The Man from U.N.C.L.E.? The Girl from U.N.C.L.E.? How about Batman and Robin? [pantomimes the fight choreography] Ping! Pow! Choom! Zoom! Down goes you, down goes your career as a leading man.

Trudi Fraser:
I believe it's the job of an actor – and I say actor, not actress because the word actress is nonsensical – it's the actor's job to avoid impediments to their performance. It's the actor's job to strive for one hundred percent effectiveness. Naturally, we never succeed, but it's the pursuit..that's meaningful.

Sadie:
Dig it! We all grew up watching TV. You know what I mean? If you grew up watching TV, that means you were watching murder. Every show on TV that wasn't I Love Lucy was about murder. So my idea is: we kill the people who taught us to kill. I mean, where the f*** are we, man? We are in f***ing Hollywood, man! The people who an entire generation grew up watching kill people live here and they live in pigshit f***ing luxury. I say f*** 'em! I say we cut their c*cks off and make 'em eat it!

Tex:
You two ready to kill some piggies?

Bruce Lee:
Now I admire Cassius Clay, I do. What I admire is, in his sport there is an element of true combat. When Cassius Clay meets Sonny Liston in the ring, that's not two athletes posturing; that's combat. Two men, trying to kill each other right now. If you don't beat him…he kills you. That's beyond athletics. That's beyond Wide World of Sports, you know? That's two warriors engaged in combat; that's what I admire.