Party Monster

Michael Alig:
You'll love me, I promise.

James:
You've gone too far with the drugs

Michael Alig:
Have you looked in the mirror lately?

Christina:
How do you like my UFO?

Michael Alig:
We don't do, we just are!

Dallas stage hand:
Okay, you guys are on stage in five.

James:
What do you mean, on stage?

Dallas stage hand:
You know - your show.

James:
Wait, what show?

James:
But we don't do anything!

James:
I'm not addicted to drugs, I'm addicted to glamour.

Michael:
132nd street, and on the double!

Keoki:
Are we going very far?

Michael:
All the way, I hope...

Michael:
We're like two peas in a pod, you and I, James.

James:
I pity the pod.

James:
Well, when was the last time you heard of a pea changing its pod?

James:
No No No for the love of god no,We are not going to start out with Michael Alig's pathetic childhood "I was molested Wahh!"

Michael:
But it's my birthday and I wanna have a bloodfeast!

Michael Alig:
Oh, everyone, it's my birthday! Time to pay attention to me!

Talk Show Host:
Is it true your son Michael turned you on to the pill ecstacy?

Elke:
He told me it was a headache pill.

Talk Show Host:
And what happened when you took it?

Elke:
Well, my headache went away.

Michael:
Hi, I'm Michael Alig.

James:
Well, I'll alert the media. Gotta dash!

Michael:
Oh, no thanks... I don't do drugs.

James:
Nor do I.

James:
Did you see that? It just flew right up my nose!

Michael Alig:
It's not so bad and after Gitsie and I get married we can have conjugal visits!

James:
Oh Michael, Im so sorry, didn't you hear? Gitsie's dead. She had an overdose.

Michael Alig:
You're just some lame-ass, Johnny-come-lately, fairy, f*ggot, copycat! You don't even know your skrink from your skrod! You stupid logger blogger!

James:
Oh darling, half the fun of eating meat is hacking it up!

Michael Alig:
James, would I lie to you

James:
All the time!

Michael Alig:
Let's see... what else, oh once when I was 10 my Sunday school teacher took me back to his house. He taught me how to french kiss among other things...

Elke:
He really took my boy under his wind. Very nice man.

Michael Alig:
His mother caught us in the basement. She screamed, "I told you not to bring them here." He said, "Don't you'll frighten them away!"

James:
Michael, I hate you for making me say serious things so I will only say this once. You've gone too far with the drugs.

Michael:
Have you looked in the mirror lately?

Michael:
So. How's the novel coming?

James:
I've done another page! But now I think I might have writer's block.

Michael:
Two pages in five years?

Michael:
So, notice anything different?

James:
[looks around] The flies?

Michael:
No, seriously James. Anything or anyone missing? Like a drug dealer who used to live here?

James:
Well darling that could be anyone. Can I buy a vowel?

Keoki:
Are we going far?

Michael:
All the way I hope.

James:
I know what you need. A nice hot cup of hot chocolate.

Michael:
Can you put some ecstasy in mine?

Michael:
We're like two peas in a pod, you and I, James.

James:
I pity the pod.

Michael:
You're the Yoda to my Luke.

James:
Excuse me. You're the Paula Abdul to my Janet Jackson.

Michael:
That's good, right?

Michael:
Our magazine's on the stands today. Can you believe it? Our own magazine!

James:
I've already seen it, and there's a problem. A big problem. I've been cut off. [reads from magazine page] "James St. James heads up white slave ring, sells twelve year old boys on Avenue B. Exclusive by Michael Alig." Why, Michael? Why?

Michael:
Oh come on Skrink, I think it's funny!

James:
My father does not share your sense of humor!

Michael:
I didn't know he was a Project X reader!

James:
Yes you did, because you sent him a lifetime subscription!

Michael:
Angel bailed me out.

James:
Angel?

Michael:
Well, actually, Angel bailed you out.

James:
Me?

Michael:
Yeah, I told the police I was you.

[James gawks in disbelief]

Michael:
Oh James, it's just all in fun. And after I told them you had AIDS, they gave me my own room with a VCR and ice cream!

James:
Michael, I don't even like you! I have never liked you!

Michael Alig:
Typical James, tired old drug addict. Can't even stay awake for your own movie!

Michael Alig:
I wanted to create my own world. A world full of color where everyone could play. One big party that never ends.

Michael Alig:
We'll put James in a cage and hang a sign over it that says, "Do not feed the drug child!"

Michael Alig:
The road of excess leads to the palace of... fabulousness!

Michael Alig:
Oh please, party in the truck!

Michael Alig:
I won't do crack without heroin!

Michael Alig:
That's not a crack hole, that's a rat hole. Rats on crack attack!

Michael Alig:
Oh James, I'm getting away with murder and you're just jealous.

Michael Alig:
That's Skrink la do, to you.

Michael Alig:
..Not that it's your movie. You think it's yours. But it's really mine. All mine.

Michael Alig:
Come to my party. You can be my boyfriend.

James St. James:
Testing, testing, 1, 2, 3. Testosterone, testicular cancer, Tess of the D'urbervilles.

James St. James:
The road of excess leads to the palace of wisdom. Blake, William. That's really all you need to know. That and "Don't dream it, be it!"

James St. James:
Michael was growing on me. Like a fungus.

James St. James:
The North Pole! I've made it across the frozen tundra. My faithful huskies perished in the blizzard way back. I had to eat them.

James St. James:
Mm, lightly toasted animal tranquilizer.

James St. James:
It doesn't matter what you look like! I mean if you have a hunchback, just throw a little glitter on it, honey, and go dancing.

James St. James:
It was better than a ten-inch dick and you know it!

Elke:
He was always making money. He just had a knack for it. My little candy man.

Police Officer:
[trying to pick Christina up] Let's go, sweetheart. You're a big girl.

James St. James:
I don't do. I just am.