Plane Dead

Frank:
You thought it was me gnawing on the passengers? Nah, I'm a vegetarian.

Paul Judd:
Two in the chest, one in the balls. That's whay I say.

Frank:
Excuse me, miss. I'll take a rum coke please. Rude me, make that two.

Megan:
[Truman shows the handcuffs so Megan would know Frank is a prisoner] Right, how about a coke?

Frank:
If a little bit bacardi would find its way in there. It would be our little secret, huh.

Megan:
Anything for you mister...

Truman:
Burrows, Truman. But no thank you.

Frank:
And I'm Frank. Frank Lee Strathmore. It's a name with a rich tradition, my family...

Truman:
She doesn't need to hear your family history, Frank.

Frank:
[to Megan] Look, I don't expect to be tied up long. Just a couple of parking ticket kinda things, really. I mean, how about if you and I meet at the Eiffel Tower around midnight?

Truman:
[to Megan] I'm sorry to disappoint you but Frank here, he's gonna be a little busy.

Megan:
That's okay. Truman, if you guys need anything let me know.

Truman:
Thank you.

Megan:
Okay.

Frank:
[Megan leaves] Truman? Truman? That pretty well does it for me. Look if you play your cards right, she could be cuffing you later.

Truman:
You're gonna shut up and drink your coke.

Frank:
You know you got the wrong man?

Truman:
Yeah, that's why Interpol has your face all over the Internet.

Frank:
It's a classic case of mistaken identity.

Truman:
Yeah.

Frank:
Hey, hey. Burrows, you can't treat me like this. I'm not guilty. It's not fair, bouncing me over the world to stand trial here and there for something I did not do. I'm not guilty. I'm not guilty, I have a clear conscience. I'm not guilty.

Truman:
Yeah.

Frank:
What is it going to take to convince you that I'm innocent.

Truman:
An act of god. Now shut up before I make you eat that flotation device you're sitting on.

Frank:
[about the shaking of the plane] Maybe this little diversion will keep my mind of your tasteless cheap suit.

Truman:
Would you feel better if I was in a b*tch ass orange jumpsuit, like the one you're gonna be wearing for the rest of your life.

Frank:
There you go getting nasty again. While I'm nearly offering a criticism on that citorial horrorshow you call a suit. However I do like the shirt, does it come in men style? And for your information, the jumpsuits in France are some sort of burgundy, yeah.

Truman:
Well you should look nice in that colour. And I know a colour corsage to get you when Big Pierre makes you his wife.

Frank:
Someone sounds a wee bit jealous.

Truman:
Yeah.

Megan:
Are you guys okay?

Frank:
I'm fine. But do you think we could move up to business class, I mean the plane's really empty and...

Truman:
He's kidding, we're fine.

Megan:
Okay.

Frank:
[Megan leaves] Hey, I'm trying to help you out here. She wants you. Make your move. Go boy, go.

Frank:
Come on, Burrows. I need to go to the sandbox.

Truman:
What?

Frank:
I gotta pee.

Truman:
No, you heard the PA. Sit down and hold it.

Frank:
Fine. Oh, if you should happen to feel something warm, just move a little to the right.

Truman:
You're like a five year old. Come on, let's go.

Frank:
[after saving Megan] You alright? no bites?

Megan:
But we thought... we thought...

Frank:
What? That it was me gnawing on the passengers? Nah, I'm a vegetarian.

Frank:
Statistically speaking, the tail section is the safest place to be in in a crash...

Truman:
Frank, not now!

Paul Judd:
[about Frank's barricade] He did that? Busy little beaver.

Truman:
Alright, we need to find everything that can be used as a weapon.

Megan:
Does anyone have anything sharp?

Frank:
Oh, they confiscated my toenail clipper. Pearl handled. It was quite lovely.

Truman:
Damn Frank, you should've brought those. Could've saved the day.

Frank:
You never know.

Paul Judd:
[about Frank] Where did you find him?

Long Shot:
[before opening the plane's door] Is that you Bennett? Sh*t. Come on mothef***er. I wanna make sure you keep that shitty little grin on your face. All the way to hell!

Frank:
[being attacked by a zombie old woman with no teeth] She's gumming me to death.

Frank:
[Frank volunteered himself to fly the plane] Where's the autopilot?

Truman:
I don't know. You're asking me, Frank?

Frank:
This is different. This is different. Don't yell at me!

Truman:
I'm not yelling!