Police, Follow that Car

Stanislav:
Good day, gentlemen, I am Inspector Stanislav. How can I help you?

Ivan:
Well, you see...

Horvat Bosnjakovic:
Wait. Let me do the talking... We would like to report a car theft.

Stanislav:
All right. Do you by any chance know the perpetrator?

Horvat Bosnjakovic:
Yes. The police.

Stanislav:
Well, I guess then we should maybe call a burglar to find the car?

Horvat Bosnjakovic:
Your car has been stolen... by a police officer. Your basic rights were violated. We shall notify Amnesty International and Human Rights Watch.

Natasa:
Hurry up, honey! You'll be late for work!

Ivan:
Here I am... here I am... Ah, do you know why I even go to work? So that people could see me driving my new car... Golf TSI... 250 horse power...

Natasa:
All right, all right!

Ivan:
That's Golf TSI! It can drive 120 miles per hour in 20 seconds. And when people see that car, they have to admire it. And the one who drives it! They respect him!

Horvat Bosnjakovic:
Did that police officer finally return your car already?

Ivan:
No, he hasn't, and stop asking me every day!

[to Ivan, after his long rant about his car]

Natasa:
Tell me, do I have to listen to this every morning? Can't you talk about anything else? When the neighbor drops by, you talk about your car for three hours until he leaves. During election you don't even care about the qualities of presidential candidates, just what cars they are driving. Or that earthquake in Japan... the first thing you asked was how many cars were destroyed... and people? Nothing!

Ivan:
[Spots a man running after a car] Is he following him?

Police officer:
[Man knocks on his car window and shows a badge] Police! I need your car, I am following a suspect!

Ivan:
What?

Police officer:
[Gets into the car and pushes Ivan out] Hurry, get out! [Drives away after the first car]

Ivan:
[Two hours later, Ivan is still standing on the street] Damn it!

Horvat Bosnjakovic:
This matter should be resolved the old fashioned way, the right-wing way. Not to, like, beat someone up the left-wing way, but to, like, beat someone up the right-wing way.