Pooh's Heffalump Movie

Tigger:
[gasp] A real hefalump?!

Rabbit:
And it got roo too!

Tigger:
Stop him!

[Roo finds Lumpy inside a trap]

Lumpy:
[crying] You said they won't be scary. You promised.

[Roo tries to break Lumpy free out of the trap, but he fails]

Roo:
Oh, Lumpy. I'm so sorry. This is all my fault.

Lumpy:
[crying] I want my mommy.

Kanga:
Rabbit, what on Earth are you doing?

Rabbit:
We're rescuing Roo from the heffalump!

Roo:
Wait, no, stop! You don't understand!

Rabbit:
What? Now, see here, Roo...!

Kanga:
Ahem. Rabbit, let him finish please.

Roo:
We were wrong about heffalumps. They're not scary creatures. Lumpy's my friend. He's just like us. He gets afraid.

Piglet:
[releases the rope] Oh!

Roo:
He likes honey.

Pooh:
[releases the rope] Oh!

Roo:
And he even likes to bounce.

Tigger:
[releases the rope, instead holds his tail] Oh, look at that.

Roo:
So, you gotta uncapture him!

[Rabbit releases the rope and signs]

Rabbit:
[apologizing] Can you ever forgive us? We've been acting very badly.

Lumpy:
That's okay, Long Ears. [giggles]

Tigger:
I like this kid already. Hoo-Hoo!

Lumpy:
[to Roo, referring on Rabbit] You're right, Rooty-Toot. He is nice. Once you get to know him.

Pooh:
I'll get some bait.

Roo:
Come on, I'll help you find her.

Mama Heffalump:
Roo, can you hear me, love? Now don't be frightened. I'm Lumpy's mommy.

Roo:
Here I am. Right here.

Mama Heffalump:
Don't you worry, love. Just leave it to me.

Roo:
This is Lumpy! He's a Heffalump!

Tigger:
[gasps] A real Heffalump?!

Rabbit:
And it's got Roo too!

Tigger:
Stop him!

[Everybody's talking at once to Rabbit about their experiences with the mysterious sound]

Pooh:
Thank goodness you're all right.

Piglet:
It came at me in the dark!

Roo:
I heard this really neat sound!

Tigger:
It was terrible!

Rabbit:
What's this all about?

Tigger:
It chilled me to the bone!

Roo:
I was asleep...

Rabbit:
Alright!

Pooh:
There's somethin' like this.

Rabbit:
[overwhelmed] One at a time!! [everyone stops and sighs] Thank you. Now what is goin'...?

Tigger:
[interrupting] Oh, oh, me! Pick me! Me-me-me-me-me-me-me-me-me!

Rabbit:
Er, Tigger?

Tigger:
There I was, sleeping, dreaming Tiggerish dreams... and suddenly everything starts shaking! And there's stuff falling everywhere! And then it stops! And I look around. And there it wasn't, my most "favoritest" family portrait. [sobbing] It was clean gone.

Pooh:
Did it look something like this, Tigger? [pulls the portrait off of Tigger's head]

Tigger:
Yeah, it was... Actually, it had a little less Pooh in it.

[We see a hole in the picture and we see Pooh's face in it]

Rabbit:
I see. [clears throat] And, uh, Pooh Bear, what about you?

Pooh:
Well, whatever it was, it ate my honey. Oh...

Roo:
And-- [Some honey falls on his face from the pot] Aw!

Pooh:
Well, actually, I ate my honey. But it made me do it.

Rabbit:
Humph.

Roo:
I was asleep in bed, and I heard this neat trumpety sound, and--

Rabbit:
Thank you, Roo. Very good. [clears throat] Now, Piglet, tell us what happened to you.

Piglet:
Actually, I-I-I'd like very much to forget.

Rabbit:
Well, what we have here is a mystery of the most mysterious kind.

[As they're talking, Roo sees a butterfly land on a large hole on the grass. Roo goes over to the hole.]

Roo:
[gasps] Wow!. H-hey everybody, look what I found!

[Pooh, Tigger, Rabbit, Piglet and Eeyore come over to look at Roo's discovery]

Tigger:
[pointing] It's a swimming pool.

Eeyore:
The sky has finally fallen. Always knew it would.

Piglet:
Oh, m-m-m-my!

Roo:
It looks like a footprint.

Tigger:
That's "impossibibble."

Rabbit:
A footprint, indeed. Anyone can see it's only a... a... a...

[Everyone screams except Roo and Eeyore. We then see four big round footprints in the same area.]

Pooh:
Rabbit, what sort of creature do you suppose would be attached to a foot that... big?

Rabbit:
There's only one thing it could be. [inhales] A Heffalump.

[Tigger, Pooh and Piglet all gasp]

Roo:
Excuse me. What's a heffalump?

Rabbit & Tigger:
What's a heffalump?!

Rabbit:
Hem hem. [singing] Everyone knows what a heffalump's like.

Tigger:
It's got fiery eyes and a tail on its spike.

Rabbit:
Claws on its paws are sharp as a tack.

Tigger:
And wing-a-ma-things coming out of its back.

Roo:
Out of its back?

Rabbit:
Of course, Roo. Precisely.

Tigger:
"Exact-tickally." Cause its bottom is up and its top's really down.

Rabbit:
So its nose is its tail or the other way 'round.

Tigger:
Yeah, and it's wide as a river and tall as a tree.

Rabbit:
Imagine gigantic.

Tigger:
And times it by three.

[We see a fantasy scene where we see giant heffalumps chasing them, eating their food and crushing houses.]

Rabbit:
It clomps here and there.

Tigger:
And it stomps to and fro.

Rabbit:
It's got three horns above.

Tigger:
And eleven below!

Piglet:
Those are its good points.

Pooh:
There's much more to know...

All:
About the dreadfully dreaded, thoroughly three-headed, horribly hazardous Heffalumps!

Roo:
Wow, neat!

Rabbit:
Neat?! It's most certainly not neat! [singing] Everyone knows they lurk and they creep.

Tigger:
The best time to see one is when it's asleep.

Rabbit:
If you sneak up behind it and get it to jump...

Tigger:
You can tell which part's Heffa-hee-hee.

Rabbit:
And which part is lump!

Singers:
They'll steal all your honey and eat your last crust. They'll stomp on your house till it's nothing but dust. The worst part of all is...

Roo:
They're different from us?

All:
They're... the... dreadfully dreaded, thoroughly three-headed, fiercely ferociously, mostly atrociously, horribly hazardous... HEFFALUMPS!

Roo:
Yeah!

[The fantasy ends and they are all back in the wood. They all sigh in relief.]

Rabbit:
And they live right over there. [points to another forest over a fence] Heffalump Hollow.

Lumpy:
Now you gotta catch me.

Roo:
I really need to go, 'cause...

Lumpy:
Aw. How come?

Roo:
Because... I've gotta catch a heffalump.

Lumpy:
Oh, really?

[Lumpy pounces Roo out of the mill and reveals himself to be a young playful heffalump]

Lumpy:
You can catch me. I'm a heffalump.

Roo:
A heffalump?

Lumpy:
[hopping up and down, singsong] Heffalump. Heffalump. That's what I am all right. A heffalump.

Roo:
But you can't be.

Lumpy:
Actually, I am.

Roo:
If you're a Heffalump... then where's your horns and spiky tail?

Lumpy:
I don't know. Wow, a spiky tail. I wish I had one.

Roo:
Are you sure you're a heffalump?

Lumpy:
My mummy says I am.

Roo:
Well, if you are a heffalump, then in the name of the Hundred Acre Wood, I capture you!

Lumpy:
Okay!

Pooh:
Um... Piglet?

Piglet:
Yes, Pooh?

Pooh:
Why are you setting out little pink jelly beans?

Piglet:
I've been leaving a trail so we can find our way back from the Heffalump expedition.

Pooh:
[freezes and realizes] Oh, bother.

Piglet:
Oh, no. WE'RE... LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOST!!

Lumpy:
I think I'd better go home now.

Roo:
Why?

Lumpy:
'Cause I'm not supposed to go in that part of the woods. Scary things live there.

Roo:
Huh? That's where I live. There aren't any scary things there.

Lumpy:
Are too. There's a stripy thing that bounces and it goes hoo hoo hoo hoo!

Roo:
Whoa! No, no, that's Tigger. You're wrong about him. He's great.

Lumpy:
And there's this little pig monster that squeals and shrieks all the time. And it will get you if you don't watch out.

Roo:
Oh no. [giggles] You're wrong about Piglet too. He wouldn't hurt a fly.

Lumpy:
And then there's that loud thing. He's got long ears. And he yells at everybody.

Roo:
Yeah, you're kind of right about Rabbit. But he's okay, once you get to know him.

Roo:
Lumpster?

Lumpy:
Yeah?

Roo:
You're not captured anymore.

Lumpy:
Yay!

Winnie the Pooh:
[narrating] This is one of my favorite once-upon-a-times, although I'm not quite sure which time it was once upon. But it had been so nice and summery in the Hundred Acre Wood and the sunshine was as warm as a blanket. And the streams were gurgling happily. As - as happily as a tumbly full of honey, hoo, which is very happy. But all that changed when... the stranger came. [sound of heffalump trumpeting]

Winnie the Pooh:
[narrating] You know, we never really did capture a heffalump that day. It was more like... like Lumpy captured all of us.