Prisoner of Second Avenue

Mel:
I haven't had a real piece of bread in thirty years. If I'd known I would have saved some rolls when I was a kid.

Edna:
Why you havin pain's in your chest?

Mel:
Because I don't have a job! Because I don't have a suit to wear. Because I'm having a God-damned nervous breakdown and they didn't even leave me with a decent pair of pajamas.

Mel:
Son's of b*tches!!!! Dirty rotten bastards!!!!! You heard me (gesture's middle finger)

Mel:
I've been here for three hours Harry... so far I got poison ivy, got chewed up by gnats, laid down in manuare, and your dog piddled all over my car... so I haven't really had a lot of time for rural ecstasy.

Mel:
Could we turn all of these off, it looks like a night game at Shea Stadium!

Mel:
Respect my ass!

Mel:
God... God... God... God...

Edna:
Mel?

Mel:
Huh?

Edna:
Can't you sleep?

Mel:
If I could sleep would I be laying here calling God at 2:00 in the morning?

Mel:
Oh am I gonna get that guy Jacoby! I know exactly what time he comes home.

Mel:
Drunk on what? They took the liquor!