Profit

Jim Profit:
When the smoke clears, and you get right down to it, only three things really matter: your faith, your fortitude, and your family. Good night.

[Profit holds up a syringe]

Bobbi Stokowski:
I have diabetes.

Jim Profit:
Then you shouldn't shoot heroin.

Jim Profit:
[Voice over] Anyone who thinks controlling people is a science is dead wrong. [Spoken] It's an art.

Jim Profit:
If you want someone to love you, open your heart. If you want someone to be obsessed with you, close it.

Charles Henry "Chaz" Gracen:
Right after old Douggie had his little mid life crisis, chucked his company and joined a monastary... had to take one last shot at me before shaving his head donning his robes... Nothing like a monk with a grudge.

Jim Profit:
[voice-over] We must welcome adversity and embrace struggle. And no matter what we get from life, never give less than 100%. Of course at the end of every battle-weary day, we fold ourselves into peaceful darkness and find comfort in those gentle words - [spoken] good night.

Jim Profit:
[speaking to Gail] Gail, the key to getting where you want to go is the choices you make.

Jim Profit:
[voice-over] When a crisis hits, the key is, never be afraid to improvise.

Gail Koner:
I thought revenge would feel good and I'm sure that he deserves whatever he gets, but it doesn't feel right.

Jim Profit:
'Course it doesn't, Gail. Revenge is pointless. It's a tool for the weak. And you're not weak. [looks over at the box containing Dr. Batewell] Not any more.

Jim Profit:
[voice-over] The key to real success is to take all your fears and put them in a box and lock them away. Of course not every evil can be tied up in a neat little package. But that's the challenge - to face our own personal darkness and to put our demons where they can't hurt us any more, to do what we can to make the world [spoken] a better place.

Charles Henry "Chaz" Gracen:
Gee is that all? I mean, after this comes out, I might still be able to get a job... wearing a hair net and asking "Would you like fries with that?"

Charles Henry "Chaz" Gracen:
I can imagine a holocaust of lawsuits and debt. I can imagine being eaten alive by bottom-feeding cannibals. I can even imagine prison.

Charles Henry "Chaz" Gracen:
The day he gets hit by a bus, I believe in God again.

Gail Koner:
I thought revenge would feel good and I'm sure that he deserves whatever he gets, but it doesn't feel right.

Jim Profit:
Of course it doesn't, Gail. Revenge is pointless. It's a tool for the weak. And you're not weak. Not anymore.

Jim Profit:
In business, the easiest thing to forget is someone's feelings.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] The key to real success is to take all your fears and put them in a box, and lock them away. Of course not every evil can be tied up in a neat little package, but that's the challenge. To face our own personal darkness and to put our demons where they can't hurt us anymore, and to do what we can to make the world a better place.

Joanne Meltzer:
I can pretend like I want to be friends and flirt with you and do that girl crap, but all I wanted was to get you alone and do one thing: find out what you think of Jim Profit.

Jeffrey Sykes:
Oh, uh, that's... complicated.

Jim Profit:
Pain. The Buddhist Monks believe it exists only to be embraces, that we must fold it into our lives along side pleasure and remember that both are fleeting.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] When two people fall out of love and into hate, they become vulnerable to all manner of passions, fears... and if someone's watching carefully - manipulation.

Jim Profit:
Anyone who thinks controlling people is a science is dead wrong: It's an art.

Jeffrey Sykes:
I don't like coincidences Jim, especially when they end up wrapped in neat little packages. Always leaves me wondering: who did the wrapping?

Joanne Meltzer:
Guard your morals Mr. Sykes, they tend to disappear around here pretty fast.

Jim Profit:
You look like a man whose conscience is bothering him.

Jeffrey Sykes:
I'm glad you know what a conscience is Jim, since you don't actually possess one.

Jim Profit:
You know I've been meaning to get one, I've just been so tied up with work lately.

Bobbi Stakowski:
Hey, you got time for a quickie?

Jim Profit:
[Jim looks at his watch] Mmmh.

Bobbi Stakowski:
[He tries to go, she holds him by his tie] Somebody's gonna get a spanking. Nice and hard.

Jim Profit:
I suppose we shouldn't be surprised when the best laid plans of mice and men backfire; after all, human beings aren't machines, they have souls. They know great joy, and inconsolable grief.

Charles Henry "Chaz" Gracen:
[after talking to Arthur MacLaine] I really need to start carrying a gun.

Charles Henry "Chaz" Gracen:
I really need to start carrying a gun.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] Sometimes evil can be forgiven, other times it must be destroyed. When an irrevocable line has been crossed, you only have one choice.

Jim Profit:
[to Bobbi] This is America, where even a drug-guzzling gutter slut like you can be the sole emotional support of a man like Charles Gracen.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] When the smoke clears and you get right down to it, only three things really matter: your faith, your fortitude, and your family. Good night.

Charles Henry "Chaz" Gracen:
That tree-hugging, organic, fruit-sucking son of a b*tch!

Jim Profit:
You have to forgive him.

Charles Henry "Chaz" Gracen:
Forgive him? I want to cut his heart out and use it for p?t?!

Nora Gracen:
Do you think I'm evil?

Jim Profit:
None of us are saints.

Charles Henry "Chaz" Gracen:
Excuse me, excuse me everyone, excuse me. I have a toast to make, well actually three. Everyone has a drink? To the family, to the company, and to Jim, who helped us keep together.

Jim Profit:
Putting a perpetrator back together with his victin, is like dropping a baby in a snake pit. Ouch.

Gail Koner:
Okay, here's the car situation... [she hands him papers on new cars] Under a year's salary, over a year's salary, and out-of-this-world. This is my favorite: 24 valves, 483 cubic einchesngine, zero to 80 faster then you can say, "Officer, I wasn't speeding. This is speeding!" then you drop the hammer and you let him eat your dust. [her smile fades when she sees Profit's surprised look] I like cars.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] The important thing to always remember in business is what may seem like a calamity can often become an opportunity - and opportunity is what life is all about.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] In my experience, the worst way to get a straight answer is to ask an honest question.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] Sometimes the most interesting results of an audit have nothing to do with numbers.

Auditor:
Did Jim Profit kill his father?

Joanne Meltzer:
Absolutely. He's the sickest son of a b*tch on the face of the earth.

Jim Profit:
Joanne, I'd like to think that someday despite all this we might be friends.

Joanne Meltzer:
Sure, if you ever got a soul or I got a lobotomy.

Bobbi Stakowski:
You know, ever since you were a little kid, there's this real snooty sound you got in your voice which made me just want to grab a belt, yank your breeches down, and beat your ass to hamburger. So what do you say? [She grabs his belt off his pants]

Jim Profit:
No, life may not be easy. It can be lonely. Full of people we think we know, but barely comprehend. Yet we must always remember: it's the challenges that define us best, and the obsticles that illuminate what we're truly capable of. We must welcome adversary, and embrace struggle. And no matter what we get from life, never give less than one hundred percent. Of course, at the end of every battle-weary day, we fold ourselves into peaceful darkness and find comfort in those gentle words: good night.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] Marriage has its high points, its low points, and sometimes, its breaking points.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] The truth is a very bitter pill to swallow. No wonder most of us need to sugar-coat it a little.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] When a man loves a woman, he'll go to great lengths to protect her. From harm, from other men of course, and sometimes from himself.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] Know when to let go of what was and be certain that your focus is always on the moment and that your plans only concern the future, not the past.

Elizabeth Gracen Walters:
So you're telling me your new junior VP is a psychopath.

Jack Walters:
Yes.

Elizabeth Gracen Walters:
Jack if you want to sleep with Joanne be my guest, but don't insult my intelligence.

Joanne Meltzer:
There are ways to undelete files, Jack.

Jack Walters:
Don't you need a search warrant for something like that?

Joanne Meltzer:
I forgot how old fashioned you are. It's refreshing.

Jack Walters:
Three months too late, but I'm sorry.

Joanne Meltzer:
For what? For having a wife that ran off on you, or for taking her back after you slept with me?

Jack Walters:
Therapy's going pretty well I see.

Jack Walters:
Say, what does your shrink say about this insomnia?

Joanne Meltzer:
He says don't talk to your ex-lovers about your sleeping habits.

Jack Walters:
Mmm, good shrink, what does he charge?

Joanne Meltzer:
A lot.

Bobbi Stakowski:
[Profit holds up a needle found in Bobbi's jewelry box & looks questioningly at Bobbi] I'm a diabetic.

Jim Profit:
Well then you shouldn't shoot heroin.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] Trust... the foundation of any marriage. If broken it can hurt even the strongest ones, and kill the weak ones.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] When you want someone to love you, open your heart. When you want someone obsessed with you, close it.

Pete Gracen:
[to the waiter] If you're done looking at her tits, I'll take the check.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] Well ya can't expect everyone to like ya, and you can't expect everything to work out exactly the way you plan it... because life is full of surprises-you never really know what's around the next corner. But if you do the best you can, and if you give 100%, then you can go to sleep with a clear conscience. What you didn't win today, you can always win tomorrow, and remember, never lose sight of your goals. Because there are some people who are really worth that extra time and effort. And in the end, I believe, if you work hard enough... everyone comes around.

Bobbi Stakowski:
Oh yeah, you never did like TV much, did you? Of course who can blame you after what happened and all. If you don't like it turn it off, it won't bite ya.

Joanne Meltzer:
Let's start with whoever could have gotten into the access prohibited files.

Jack Walters:
Well, there's Pete and Mary. Pete's too dumb to think up something like this and Mary's too good a person.

Joanne Meltzer:
You think?

Jack Walters:
Married to her job, company nun.

Joanne Meltzer:
I arrested a nun once. She killed a priest.

Jack Walters:
Why?

Joanne Meltzer:
He dumped her for a choirboy. Nobody's perfect, Jack.

Jim Profit:
You can't run from your past, and you can't run from yourself.

Joanne Meltzer:
And you can't run from me you son of a b*tch.

Jim Profit:
We all seek that other, a soul mate, the shadow self with whom we can merge seamlessly. But in that coming together, we risk losing ourselves. Everything becomes a blur, and we grow afraid, unsure... even distrustful. The danger, of course, is we never know who that other really is, what they want, or the lengths they'll go to to get it. In the end, it's probably best to go your own way, even though there will be times you long for something else.

Jim Profit:
We're all standing in a gasoline lake. Everybody needs a match.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] Security: it doesn't exist in nature. No animal is so arrogant as to ever feel completely safe, only humans believe they can find assured well-being through design & technology... some even believe it with a vengeance.

Charles Henry "Chaz" Gracen:
Nothing like a monk with a grudge.

Jim Profit:
We all seek that "other"; a shadow self with whom we can merge seemlessly. But in that coming together, we risk loosing ourselves.

Jim Profit:
[voiceover] Failure is a much better teacher than success.

Charles Henry "Chaz" Gracen:
The day he gets hit by a bus I believe in God again.

Jeffrey Sykes:
I'm just having a little trouble telling these corporate guys from the guys in the mob.

Lucinda:
The guys in the mob carry guns.