Red Heat

Art Ridzik:
I'm gonna bust that b*tch so hard she bounces.

Art Ritzik:
I'm gonna get us something from all four food groups: hamburgers, french fries, coffee and doughnuts.

Abdul Elijah:
Revolutionary political leaders like myself are incarcerated to keep us quiet.

Ivan Danko:
What is your political crime?

Abdul Elijah:
I robbed a bank.

Art Ridzik:
About this pile-of-sh*t pimp in here. In this country, we try to protect the rights of individuals. It's called the Miranda Act, and it says that you can't even touch his ass.

Ivan Danko:
I do not want to touch his ass. I want to make him talk!

Ivan Danko:
Soviet method is more economical.

Art Ridzik:
Oh, great. We got a pro basketball team coming toward us - with guns!

Cat Manzetti:
You leave your guns with those guys over there.

Art Ridzik:
No way. A Chicago cop never relinquishes his weapon.

Art Ridzik:
Here you go.

Ivan Danko:
I have car under control.

Art Ridzik:
Yeah, I'm sure they taught you all about cars and the price of insurance at your famous Russian school in Kiev!

Ivan Danko:
In socialist countries, insurance not necessary. State pays for everything.

Art Ridzik:
Yeah? Well, tell me something, Captain. If you've got such a f***ing paradise over there, how come you're up the same creek as we are with heroin and cocaine?

Ivan Danko:
Chinese find way. Right after revolution, they round up all drug dealers, all drug addicts, take them to public square, and shoot them in back of head.

Art Ridzik:
Ah, it'd never work here. F***ing politicians wouldn't go for it.

Ivan Danko:
Shoot them first.

Viktor Rostavili:
The people have many needs. One is law and order. Other? Entertainment.

Viktor Rostavili:
We both have our codes, Vanya. Yours, one of the State. Mine, one of thieves.

Viktor Rostavili:
Any country that can survive Stalin can certainly handle a little dope.

Abdul Elijah:
You want to know what my crime is? My crime was being born. I'm thirty-eight years old, and I've been locked up twenty-six of those. I educated myself in here, and I've come to understand that this country was built on exploiting the black man. Of course, I don't hear anything about brothers in your country. But your country exploits its own people just the same, so I guess that makes me the only Marxist around here, right, comrade? You see, boy, this ain't just no drug deal! This is politics, baby, this is economics, this is spiritual! I plan to sell drugs to every white man in the world... and his sister!

Art Ridzik:
You know this game? It's called chicken, except you're not supposed to play it with buses.

Commander Lou Donnelly CPD:
How do you deal with stress in Russia?

Ivan Danko:
Vodka.

Ivan Danko:
Time to feed my parakeet.

Art Ridzik:
What is that, Russian for "wacking off"?

Ivan Danko:
Capitalism!