Roald Dahl's Danny the Champion of the World

Captain Lancaster:
This isn't a school! It's a bear pit! The most disgusting shambles I've ever seen! I'm resigning, do you hear me? As of now!

Mr. Snoddy:
Good!

Mr. Snoddy:
Captain Lancaster, I thought I made it crystal clear when I appointed you that I will not tolerate any form of corporal punishment in my school!

Captain Lancaster:
I was perfectly within my rights. The boys were cheating.

Mr. Snoddy:
Oh, were they indeed?

[goes from his office to the classroom]

Mr. Snoddy:
Danny, Sid...

[they come to him]

Mr. Snoddy:
The rest of you, sit down, sit down. Try to be good. [shuts the door] Now, on your word of honor, were either of you two cheating just now?

[Captain Lancaster looks on derisively]

Danny:
No sir.

Mr. Snoddy:
And you?

Sidney:
No sir.

Mr. Snoddy:
Good. Back to class.

[the boys leave]

Mr. Snoddy:
Captain Lancaster, if I catch you using the cane ever again in my school, you'll be out on your ear. Is that understood? [Lancaster refuses to answer] Is that understood, sir?

Captain Lancaster:
[through his teeth] Yes, sir.

Mr. Snoddy:
Good, sir!

Victor Hazell:
I should warn you, I always get what I want!

William Smith:
No one can have EVERYTHING they want.

Victor Hazell:
I'm warning you, Smith - you trespass on my land again, you're gonna get shot!

Doc Spencer:
Who the devil do you think you are? Just because you've got a bit of money, you think you have the right to...

Victor Hazell:
Shut up, will you! D'you hear me, Smith?

William Smith:
At the moment, Mr. Hazell, you are on MY land. You have one minute to get off it.

Rabbetts:
I'm certainly not staying out here all night on the wages I get paid!

Victor Hazell:
[it starts raining] I'm getting wet, Rabbetts!

William Smith:
You're right, I should have sent him to school earlier. But, you see... my wife died when he was four months old. [nods toward her picture on the wall, and adds quietly] He was all I had.

Miss Hunter:
[sympathetically, looking at the picture] A fine-looking girl.

Miss Hunter:
Well, I'm convinced. And I can assure you, you won't be hearin' any more from the council. Danny, you're a lucky boy - you've got the most spiffin' father!

Lord Claybury:
[as they are served punch cups] What the devil does Hazell think this is, a wedding?

Tallon:
I suppose he thinks its traditional.

Lord Claybury:
[incredulous] Traditional? Punch at a shoot?

[last lines]

Mr. Snoddy:
God bless you, Danny Boy!