Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed

Shaggy:
This is tied for the most terrifying day of my life!

Velma:
Tied with what?

Shaggy:
Every other freaking day of my life!

Shaggy:
We're gonna die!

Daphne:
Think positive!

Shaggy:
We're gonna die quickly!

Shaggy:
[to Patrick] Patrick, I'd love to do this all night, and something tells me you would, but it's time we make like your personality, and split.

Shaggy:
Hey guys, Scooby's feelin kinda like he's got rabies. We're just gonna go outside and get some fresh air.

Shaggy:
[about Old Man Wickles] Here's a clue for ya, Scoob - that guy's wearing his freak hat 24/7.

Shaggy:
Run, Scoob, it's a skele-thingy!

Daphne:
Freddy, are you okay? Wanna talk?

Fred:
Talkin's for wimps.

[Fred gets out of the mystery machine]

Fred:
It's time for action.

Patrick:
Velma, let go of the grate!

Velma:
So I can fall to my death?

Patrick:
So I can pull you up! You gotta trust me!

Velma:
No! I only trust the facts and all the facts say that you're the evil masked figure!

Patrick:
What does your heart say?

Velma:
I don't know, it's beating too loud for me to hear!

Patrick:
Look deeper, you gotta trust me! [pulls her up]

Black Knight:
[after being electrocuted] Oh, crap!

Shaggy:
[Scooby slaps him] I needed that.

[Scooby slaps him again]

Shaggy:
I needed that too.

[Scooby punches him]

Shaggy:
[shouts] You're pushin' your luck Scoob.

Fred:
Hey! He said my thing that I say!

Daphne:
Guys, come on remember what I told you?

Shaggy:
Never pick your nose in public.

Daphne:
No, but that's... good too.

Scooby-Doo:
Rimage ris everything.

Daphne:
Yes, image is everything. Okay the whole city is watching, so try to keep a brave face.

Shaggy:
Huh?

Daphne:
Guys, they're costumes.

Shaggy:
She's right, Scoob, up close they look totally fake.

[after releasing herself and friends from the trap using make-up accessories]

Daphne:
I enjoy being a girl.

Heather:
It's my job to unmask those who pretend to be who they're not.

Daphne:
Unmask those? You sound like...

Heather:
Sound like who?

Daphne:
The Evil-Masked Guy. But you knew that. Because just as you know I'm standing here you know that I know who you know you are, which is him who's a her which is you.

Heather:
Oh. Now I see what you're doing for the gang. You're in charge of incoherent bubbling.

Evil Masked Figure:
Mystery Incorporated, once again you have proven useless before my power. Because of you soon Coolsville will be mine

Heather:
darn it! thanks alot, the scoop of the night gone. can't you do anything right

Daphne:
Fred, do you think that I'm just a pretty face?

Fred:
No. I mean... yes. I mean *not fat*. Definitely *not fat*. Is this sort of you're looking for?

Daphne:
Fat? Why did you even use that word?

Fred:
I'm affraid. I'm a wimp, huh?

Daphne:
That doesn't make you a wimp. Makes you human.

Old Man Wickles:
Darn bushes howling at me again.

Shaggy:
[Shaggy and Scooby trying to act like real spies] Scoob, what's your conclusion?

Scooby-Doo:
[holds up a sketch of a bunny] Bunny!

Daphne:
[after thinking of a clever retort to some jeering kids] Hey! Shut up!

Daphne:
They're cheering for us again.

Fred:
I always thought that was the best thing in the world. I guess I found something a bit better.

Daphne:
Everyone has flaws. You just have to make sure the other person doesn't see them.

[in the monster hide]

Evil Masked Figure:
Soon your friends will be dead... And Coolsville destroyed... My revenge will be final... And there's nothing you can do about it!

Patrick:
I got to act tough or these people will beat up me a lot.

[Shaggy and Scooby start laughing]

Patrick:
What? Do you think I'm kidding?

Shaggy:
Uhh?

Scooby-Doo:
No! No?

Patrick:
[starts laughing] See!

[Shaggy and Scoob laugh again, then when Shaggy and Scoob about to leave]

Patrick:
Boo! [starts laughing again]

Shaggy:
[a potion has given Shaggy muscles] I'm buff!

Black Knight Ghost:
[after being electrocuted] Oh crap.

Cotton Candy Glob:
You never should have locked those locks. Now you're stuck in here with me. The Cotton Candy Glob!

Shaggy:
Cotton Candy Glob? [Scooby and Shaggy start eating the ghost]

Cotton Candy Glob:
NO! I'll give you cavities.

Scooby-Doo:
[Scooby has become smart and Shaggy is a big jock] This Schwartzenagren oaf almost destroyed us.

Shaggy:
Ha ha, go boom!

Scooby-Doo:
Oh you are embarrasing.

Old Man Wickles:
As if you getting the lead in "My Fair Lady" wasn't enough!

Jacobo:
I was an excellent Eliza! You were too "acty".

Old Man Wickles:
And stealing my tator tots?

Jacobo:
You kept saying you felt puffy!

Shaggy:
[Scooby and Shaggy are surrounded by monsters] We have to remain calm. [Scooby screams] CALM SCOOBY DOO! YOU'RE NOT BEING CALM! [Scooby slaps him] I needed that! [Scooby slaps him again] I needed that too! [Scooby punches him] You're pushing your luck Scoob!

Daphne:
Where is it?

Velma:
[mumbling] I gave it to Shaggy and Scooby.

Fred:
Ha, that's funny. It sounded like you said you gave it to Shaggy and Scooby.

Fred:
You can't fool me with that macho facade. You're just afraid to show your sensitive side.

Black Knight Ghost:
Oh... you've touched my inner child... and he's REALLY MAD!

Shaggy:
Come on Scoob. [bumps into Miner 49er] Miner... 40... 9er.

Miner 49er:
HAHAHAHAHAHA! [breathes fire at Shaggy and Scooby]

Miner 49er:
[chasing Shaggy and Scooby] I'll get you, you varmints.

Ned:
But we cuddled!

Miner 49er:
I'll get you, you varmints!

Shaggy:
Dig this, daddy-o. It's a real gas.

Buttercup Scout:
Would you like to buy some cookies?

Man in Suit:
Have you heard the good news?

Scooby-Doo:
Yeah. There's cookies.

Evil Masked Figure:
You can't do this to me! Who do you think you are?

Scooby-Doo:
Scooby... dooby... doo.

[Scooby puts the control panel on the thing and presses the button]

Evil Masked Figure:
No!

[Daphne has made Velma look sexy in preparation for Patrick coming over]

Velma:
Who's your mommy...

Patrick:
Who's my... my mommy?

Shaggy:
[trying to act like Fred, Daphne, and Velma and reading fax paper upside down] What markings are these?

Fred:
[turns fax right side up] Words

Shaggy:
Ah, words

[Velma is wearing an orange-leather catsuit and trying to walk in a sexy manner]

Patrick:
Uh, Velma? Do you have to go to the bathroom?

Velma:
No, I can't in this outfit.

Fred:
And the real identity of Ned is...

[Fred pulls Ned's Hair]

Ned:
Ow!

Fred:
[angrily] Ned!

Scooby-Doo:
[about to put the control panel on monster maker] Rooby... Dooby... Doo!

Fred:
This is bad.

Shaggy:
No doubt.

Fred:
Shaggy?

Shaggy:
Yeah?

Fred:
Who's driving?

Shaggy:
Uhh... [the gang looks back to see who is driving with no one there but Scooby in the passenger seat]

Scooby-Doo:
Rello!

[Shaggy and Scooby start playing with the control panel, which makes a beat with its noises]

Shaggy:
[rapping] My name is Shaggy Fresh, and I'm the best at solving crimes. When the monsters see my face, they start to scream and shake like a girl with Justin Timberlake!

Scooby-Doo:
[rapping] My name is Scooby-Fresh. Raca-re-ra-ra-roo-ra-ree. Araca-ra. A-re-ra-roo-ree. A-roo-ra-racaraca-a-re-ra-roo.

Shaggy, Scooby-Doo:
We're the greatest detectives! We're the greatest detectives! We're the greatest detectives!

Scooby-Doo:
Re're the reatest retectives!

Fred:
They're totally having a montage in there without us.

Velma:
[Velma, Shaggy and Scooby-Doo come across a pair of silhouettes belonging to ghouls] The skeleton men.

Shaggy:
[Scooby-Doo reacts by abruptly farting] He does that when he gets nervous.

Scooby-Doo:
[Fanning a paw behind his butt] Rorry.

Daphne:
Guys, come on! Remember what I told you?

Shaggy:
Never pick your nose in public?

Daphne:
[beat] No... but that's good, too.

Scooby:
Image is everything.

Daphne:
Yes! Image is everything. The whole city is watching, so try to keep a brave face. They're costumes.

Boy on bike #1:
Hey! Nice job last night...

Both boys on bikes:
Losers!

Daphne:
[to the gang] Quick, we need to think of a comeback.

Boy on bike #2:
What dorks!

Daphne:
[to the boys] Hey! Shut up!

Velma:
Mr. Wickles, we need to ask you a few questions about your ties to recent monster attacks.

Jeremiah Wickles:
I don't know nothing about no monsters.

Daphne:
Well, then how come there was randomonium on the floor of your mansion?

Jeremiah Wickles:
There's- there- there's randomonium all over the place! Look it! I come home with it in my shorts!

Fred:
Are you continuing the work of your old pal Jonathan Jacobo?

Jeremiah Wickles:
"Old pal"? Jacobo? We hated each other! And in the prison cafeteria, he used to steal my tater tots! And he got the lead in My Fair Lady.

Velma:
Then why did we find the monster book in your library?

Jeremiah Wickles:
Wait a second... You're the runts what vandalized my home! Which one of you stole my toilet brush?!

Shaggy:
[after accidentally being transformed into a woman] I've got a chick's body!

Scooby:
[accidentally turns into the Tasmanian Devil] I'm the Tasmanian Devil!

Tough Shaggy:
Check out my pecs, little man!

Smart Scooby:
Hush now, buffoon. This is a highly combustible synthesis.

Tough Shaggy:
A what?

Smart Scooby:
I'm going to transform us back!

Tough Shaggy:
No way, geek! I'm gonna stay this way FOREVEEEER! [throws formula into the wall]

Smart Scooby:
NOOOOO!

Shaggy:
The only time we've done something right is when we accidentally plowed into the Snow Ghost, because we accidentally glued our feet to rocket-powered roller skates.

Scooby:
Yeah. Eight stupid times.

Shaggy:
Let's face it Scoob. We'll never anymore than our old goofy selves. [sad] I wish once, just once, I could do the right thing on purpose. You know Scoob, like be a hero, and save the day...But who are we kidding, right? [throws rock into lake which hits Captain Cutler's helmet and makes a hollow noise] Captain Cutler's ghost. CAPTAIN CUTLER'S GHOST!!!!!!!!!!!

Velma:
[hands Shaggy the control panel] Here Shaggy, take this.

Shaggy:
Why are you giving this to me? [hands it back to her]

Velma:
[hands it back to Shaggy] I'll distract those skeletal screwballs, you and Scooby get this to the Monster Hive.

Shaggy:
Us?! [looks at Scooby]

Velma:
Yes, you're faster than me. Once there, just plug it into the base, [points to a button on the control panel] and push this button. I fixed it so it'll destroy all the monsters.

Shaggy:
[slides down a wall] But... but we can't.

Scooby:
[upset] We're screw-ups.

Shaggy:
I mean, we tried being heroes like you guys, but we're not, okay? We're just not!

Scooby:
No.

Velma:
[surprised] Like me? [kneels next to Shaggy] That's funny... I've always wanted to be like you guys. [Shaggy and Scooby look at each other in confusion] You guys are so free. You're never afraid to be who you really are. Whether you're fearful, or joyful, or... hungry. I think you've been heroes all along. You just haven't known it.

Black Knight Ghost:
On your knees, knave.

Fred:
Can't you see we're talking?

Black Knight Ghost:
[repeated Fred line at the high school clubhouse] Talking is for wimps.

Fred:
You can't fool me with that macho façade. You're just afraid to show your sensitive side.

Black Knight Ghost:
Ohh, you've touched my inner child... AND HE'S REALLY MAD!

Male Reporter:
Mystery Inc., Do you know the identity of the Evil Masked Figure behind at all?

Velma:
Well, if our hunch is correct, the Evil Masked Figure is... [Daphne and Velma takes off the mask]

Evil Masked Figure/Heather:
NO! [everyone gasping]

Daphne:
Heather Jasper-Howe.

Scooby:
Uh-huh. Huh? [Jeremiah and Patrick arrive]

Female Reporter 1:
But she was at the museum when the Masked Figure was on the roof!

Daphne:
[to Heather] You almost had me there, didn't you? Lucky for her, she had an assistant helping her along with her evil plans. [points at Ned] NED. [going to a flashback where Ned puts on Heather's costume] When I realized she was the Evil Masked Figure he quickly changed into her costume.

Female Reporter 2:
But why did she do it?!

Velma:
Because, Heather-Jasper Howe is actually... [Velma peels her face off turns out it's their past foe and everyone gasps louder] ...Dr. Jonathan Jacobo. [Daphne and Shaggy gasps and shocking Jeremiah Wickles] The original Pterodactyl Ghost.

Female Reporter 3:
But how do you know this?

Velma:
[showing the picture] A photo. Taken of Jacobo in front of the Coolsonian. Jacobo supposedly died a year before construction even began.

Shaggy:
So, Jacobo survived that fall off the prison wall.

Scooby:
Yeah.

Fred:
He also adapted the false Heather Jasper-Howe persona to turn the press against us!

Daphne:
Then he framed poor hideous old man Wickles by putting that book and the Black Knight Ghost in his mansion.

Jeremiah Wickles:
As if you getting the lead in My Fair Lady wasn't enough!

Jonathan Jacobo:
I was an excellent Eliza! You were to acty!

Jeremiah Wickles:
AND STEALING MY TATER TOTS!!!!!

Jonathan Jacobo:
You kept saying you felt puffy!

Fred:
And the real identity of Ned is... [rips his hair realizing it's himself]

Ned:
OW!

Fred:
NED!

Scooby:
Huh?!

Jonathan Jacobo:
I would've gotten away with it. If it weren't for those meddling punks and their dumb dog!!!!!!!!!!!! [everyone cheers Mystery Inc.]

Ned:
You were a dude this whole time?

Jonathan Jacobo:
Of course, dummkopf.

Ned:
But, we cuddled.

Fred:
Yo, Metalhead!

Black Knight Ghost:
Yes?

Fred:
Bring it! [Black Knight Ghost Hits Fred with shield] He brought it all right.

Patrick:
Stop wasting my time! Do you hear me?! Now, I want you to question all of your scum-bucket friends. They'll find out about what they know about those stolen costumes, or else you'll be known from here on in as the Soiled Underwear Ghost. I want answers! Now, go!

Man:
Yes, sir!

Patrick:
Now!

Man:
Yes, sir!

[The monsters turn back into the stolen costumes]

Evil Masked Figure:
[gasps] My monsters!

Dr. Jonathan Jacobo:
Come alive! Come alive!

Dr. Jonathan Jacobo:
So long, suckers! [falls] Help me, suckers!

Dr. Jonathan Jacobo:
I would've gotten away with it, if it weren't for those meddling punks, and their dumb dog!

Heather Jasper-Howe:
Darn it! Thanks a lot! The scoop of the night is gone! Can't you do anything right? Ned, get your camera and follow me!