Secret Diary of a Call Girl

Belle:
The first thing you should know about me is that I'm a whore.

Belle:
Escort, Hooker, Prostitute, Whore, I don't care what you call me. There all just semantics.

[first lines]

Belle:
I love London. I love its rudeness, its lack of community, its impatience. I even love its weather. But most of all I love the anonymity.

Belle:
Be fabulous but forgettable.

Belle:
I've never been addicted to anything. [pause] Except maybe the 4th season of the West Wing.

Belle:
You've been much fatter than this, I wouldn't put you on a diet.

Ben:
[jokingly] True, but aside from that you were the worst girlfriend ever.

[last lines]

Belle:
Sometimes it's not the youngest or the richest clients you want or the ones you have most in common with. For me the perfect partner is one where I never have to be myself.

[first lines]

Belle:
Behind closed doors in warmly lit rooms all over London pleasure is taking place. Some spontaneous, some planned, and yes, some paid for. And tonight's, tonight's is *strictly* invitation only. Sometimes I get paid to do the things I've always wanted to do.

[last lines]

Belle:
Maybe my personal life and my professional life aren't that easily reconciled. Well, that's true of all of us surely. At least I get to go to bed with my favourite author, just not in the way I'd have liked.

[first lines]

Belle:
I always use black cabs, not mini cabs. At least you get a different driver each time. They know what I'm up to, and I know they know. But they still ask me and expect me to lie. It's just a game we play. Everything in here [shakes large handbag] is important. But the only essential thing on an all-night job is this. [raises arm to display watch] A lot can happen on an all-nighter.

[last lines]

Belle:
So that's it - the all-nighter. You play some games. You read a book. You phone your friend. And in the small hours, when all you want is your own bed, you do what everybody else does when they're on the night shift. You think of the money.

Hannah:
[into phone] Good morning, Benjamin. [laughs] All right. How are you? [pause] Where are you?

[first lines]

Belle:
I spend half my life removing hair and maintaining my body. Being an escort involves pain. But it's almost always self-inflicted. But sometimes pain can be pleasure.

[last lines]

Belle:
Sirona was right. Hurting people is a very special talent. S & M has taught me one thing. Maybe absolute control isn't always best. Maybe sometimes you've got to give a bit away.

Belle:
What about the sex?

Mistress Sirona:
There is no sex.

Belle:
Then how do you know you're finished?

Mistress Sirona:
My watch beeps!

Belle:
[Brandishing a leather flogger, relieved to be home, unseen, with the dreadful thing] So glad I wasn't hit by a bus!

[first lines]

Shop Assistant:
Lovely. Just Lovely. A lot of girls cry when they see themselves in a wedding dress. Every little girl's dream. Or nightmare, you know, if you're fat.

Belle:
[answering phone] Hello?

Stephanie:
Do you do girls?

Belle:
[laughs]

Stephanie:
It says here, "Yes to anal, GFE, school uniform. No to scats, stags, and water sports." I've got nothing against girls.

Hannah:
Am I ever going to be able to talk to you about this?

Ben:
I don't know. Try. Even if I act like a cock about it, I still want you to try.

[last lines]

Ben:
I need to ask you something. It's a favor. You don't have to do it if you don't want to do it.

Hannah:
You're not going to ask me to have sex with you and Vanessa, are you?

Ben:
What? No.

Hannah:
Whew. [laughs]

Ben:
Others may pay hundreds for you, but I had you when all it took was half a lager and a couple of Marlboro Lights. [pause] Will you be my best man?

Belle:
[they begin to kiss each other] Oh no, we can't.

Ben:
Why not? Come on Hanna!

Belle:
It's Belle, all right?

Bambi:
They call me Bambi.

Belle:
Oh, because of your big eyes I suppose.

Bambi:
No, because my mother got shot.

[Belle looks shocked]

Bambi:
Only joking.

Alex:
[offering Belle a drink] Irish coffee, except without the coffee, which would technically be whisky?

Belle:
Some choices we make for ourselves in life. And some we make for other people. Not because we don't love them, but because we do. The only way we know it's right is if it lets us stay true to ourselves. But we can't regret our choices. The past is behind us. All we have is the present. And the future. Whatever that may bring.