Shaft in Africa

Jazar:
How long is your phallus, Mr. Shaft?

Shaft:
My what?

Jazar:
Your cock?

Shaft:
Baby, by now it's shrunk down to 20 inches.

Shaft:
Now wait a minute. Now I'm not James Bond. Simply Sam Spade.

Col. Gonder:
Well, Mr. Shaft, it seems we've brought you a long distance for nothing. Obviously the opposition knows about you. If you choose to call it off, we'll understand.

Shaft:
What? And blow 25 grand?

Col. Gonder:
Only money brings you here?

Shaft:
Hell no! I just love to have my picture taken with lions.

Zubair:
You know how to ride camel?

Shaft:
No ride camel. Ride ass!

Wassa:
Where did you study stick fighting, Mr. Shaft?

Shaft:
Conducting the New York Philharmonica.

Wassa:
The Emir will be pleased. Also by the fact that you're already circumsiced.

Emir Ramila:
How good are you with a stick?

Shaft:
Cat named Shaft ain't gonna be bad with a stick.

Shaft:
Look, why don't you get rid of that jolly giant over there, so you and I can get down to the finer strokes.

Aleme:
Oziot has guarded me since I was a child. Sometimes I think of him as my living chastity belt.

Shaft:
Damn! Man that size, baby, that's a whole lot of chastity!

Aleme:
I'm still on my first age grade. We call that fareita. No one is permitted to marry while they are in fareita.

Shaft:
What do you do for relaxation?

Aleme:
I enter chala, my second age grade, this February. And even the emir's daughter may have sex and marry, after my clitoradectomy.

Shaft:
Your what?

Aleme:
My clitoradectomy. Female circumcision.

Shaft:
You mean when they cut off your...?

Aleme:
Are you afraid to say the word? My clitoris! Yes! That's what they do in the time of chala.

Shaft:
Hell, no wonder the natives get restless!

Aleme:
Mr. Shaft, the emphasis in our marriage is not about sexual pleasure, but on the rearing of children.

Shaft:
Listen, baby. February is just around the corner. Now how the hell are you gonna know what you are missing unless you give it a little wear and tear before they take it away?

Aleme:
Are you volunteering?

Shaft:
You damn right!

Amafi:
Listen, Mr. Wassa. I don't love this young lady. I don't even particularly like her. But she's the only person in the world I've ever found who can get it up for me.