Showtime

Detective Mitch Preston:
Do you feel lucky, punk? Well, do ya? I'm too old for this sh*t. Go on, I dare ya.

Detective Mitch Preston:
I've gotta go wash this sh*t out of my hair and get a change of clothes

Detective Mitch Preston:
I have no interest in you, your stupid questions, or your silly show

Detective Mitch Preston:
Get that camera out of here!

Trey Sellars:
Keep that camera right where it is!

Detective Mitch Preston:
My ex and I were on the rocks, and my marriage counselor said I needed to take up a hobby.

Trey Sellars:
How come you never got good at it?

Detective Mitch Preston:
Well, it's kind of like you and police work. I never took it that seriously.

Detective Mitch Preston:
Why did you want to be a cop, anyway?

Trey Sellars:
Because I was a shitty waiter.

Chase Renzi:
(unimpressed) This is your house?

Detective Mitch Preston:
No, this is my batcave. There's a tunnel in here leading to my cliffside mansion a few miles north.

William Shatner:
(advising Trey on how TV cops taste drugs) You spear the knife into the bag... then pick some of the drugs up with the knife... then lightly press it on your tongue. And that is how TV cops taste drugs!

Detective Mitch Preston:
What if its cyanide?

Chase Renzi:
That's great TV!

Trey Sellars:
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Detective Mitch Preston:
I doubt it.