Six Pack

Brewster Baker:
You watch your mouth, Shiftey!

Swifty:
It's Swifty! SWIFTY, you toad sucker!

Sheriff:
Get your asses out here on the double!

Sheriff:
[Repeated line] Shut up, Otis!

Swifty:
[as Brewster drives off] You no good, rotten, washed up, fork tongue, black hearted, double dealing, backstabbing, alci bum! We could've been great together.

Swifty:
Kick his ass, Brewster! Don't take that sh*t from this fungus faced toad sucker!

Terk:
[to Brewster] I'd tell that little punk that he shouldn't be talking to me like that if I were you.

Brewster Baker:
He's right, Swifty. Be polite, Mr. Logan here's a very sensitive man. [takes a few steps away and looks at Terk] On second thought, I got a good mind to turn this little kid loose and let him just whip your ass, Terk!

Swifty:
That's it, Brewster! Drive it 'till you hear glass and smell sh*t!

Brewster Baker:
What'd you say, mister?

Swifty:
I said 'where we going, sir?'.

Sheriff:
Not this time, boy. I'm in charge of my charges.

Brewster Baker:
I want those kids, Sheriff.

Sheriff:
I just bet you do.

T.V. Commentator:
[running to pit road, with microphone in hand and camera crew in tow] On my way to Baker's car. Be there in a minute.

Sheriff:
Well, I got an arrest warrant from the state of Texas, and extradition papers from the state of Georgia.

T.V. Commentator:
Pardon me, officer. Brewster, what made you take that wrong turn?

Brewster Baker:
Chris, I don't think I took a wrong turn. I'll tell ya, this sheriff here is from the same hometown as my six pack, and he's driven all the way from Texas to arrest these six hardened criminals.

T.V. Commentator:
How 'bout a comment, Sheriff?

Sheriff:
I'm a Texas law officer. I don't have to talk in front of no damn camera.

Brewster Baker:
[to Chris] Ask one of the kids. They'll tell you what's going on.

T.V. Commentator:
That sounds like a great story. How 'bout some comments, Sheriff?

Sheriff:
[talking softly to Brewster] Look, can't we talk about this in private somewhere?

Brewster Baker:
Well, there's no need to do that Sheriff. We are on network TV, but there's a good chance that the Governor of Texas, and the good people who elected you to office, are watching. Now's your chance to explain to them why you came here to arrest these six little kids.

Sheriff:
Well, we didn't come here to arrest them, exactly.

Otis:
Can I say 'howdy' to the folks back home?

Sheriff:
Shut up Otis!

Brewster Baker:
What did you come for?

Sheriff:
We came to... check on 'em. Yeah.

Brewster Baker:
To check on 'em?

Sheriff:
Yeah. [to Chris] See, these children are orphans, and we have to make sure they have proper supervision. Well, I can see they're getting that. [looking into camera, tipping his cowboy hat] So I am very proud to report to the good people of the great State of Texas that these children are in the capable hands of... [mumbling] Mr. Brewster Baker.

Little Harry:
[with Brewster holding him in his arms, flips down the Sheriff's hat] No sh*t Dick Tracy.