State and Main

Walt Price:
It's not a lie. It's a gift for fiction.

Joseph Turner White:
How do I do a film called "The Old Mill" when I don't have an old mill?

Ann Black:
Well, first you've got to change the title.

Walt Price:
Who designed these costumes? It looks like Edith Head puked, and that puke designed these costumes.

Ann Black:
Everybody makes their own fun. If you don't make it yourself, it isn't fun. It's entertainment.

Marty Rossen:
I'm going to rip your heart out, then I'm going to piss on your lungs through the hole in your chest!

Doc Wilson:
It's the truth that you should never trust anybody who wears a bow tie. Cravat's supposed to point down to accentuate the genitals. Why'd you wanna trust somebody whose tie points out to accentuate his ears?

Joseph Turner White:
What's an associate producer credit?

Bill Smith:
It's what you give to your secretary instead of a raise.

Bob Barrenger:
Everybody needs a hobby.

Joseph Turner White:
You like kids?

Ann Black:
Never saw the point of 'em.

Joseph Turner White:
Me neither.

Joseph Turner White:
You believe that?

Ann Black:
I do if you do.

Joseph Turner White:
But it's absurd.

Ann Black:
So is our electoral process. But we still vote.

Bob Barrenger:
I know my lines.

Walt Price:
You do?

Bob Barrenger:
I just don't know what order they come in.

Walt Price:
This is what my people died for... the right to make a movie in this town.

Walt Price:
What does he like?

Bill Smith:
14-year-old girls.

Walt Price:
Well, get him something else. We want to get out of this town alive. Get him half a 28-year-old girl. How's my math?

Ann Black:
"If you were never down, how would you know when you were up?"

Joe White:
You have a gift for words.

Ann Black:
It's in your play.

Marty Rossen:
Get him some... Maple syrup.

Walt Price:
Maple syrup. Grows on trees.

Marty Rossen:
Actually, it's an extract of the tree.

Claire Wellesley:
I'm not a child! I have feelings!

Walt Price:
And we're going to sue you for a billion dollars.

Joe White:
What cause?

Walt Price:
I don't need a cause, I just need a lawyer!

Bob Barrenger:
So, that happened.

Marty Rossen:
And how are you getting along with these fine people?

Walt Price:
Like dykes and dogs!

Marty Rossen:
Mm, this is good. Have you tried it?

Walt Price:
Oh, like I'm really going to eat carbohydrates.

Joseph Turner White:
Ever wonder why the Dalmatian's the symbol of the firehouse?

Ann Black:
First organized fire department was on the border of Dalmatia and Sardinia in the year 642.

Joseph Turner White:
That's why the Dalmatian?

Ann Black:
It was either that, or a sardine.

Bunky:
Well, it takes all kinds.

Spud:
That's what it takes? I always wondered what it took.

Marty Rossen:
If your memory was as long as your dick, you'd be in good shape.

Walt Price:
What does that woman WANT from life?

Marty Rossen:
She wants $800,000 to show her tits.

Tommy Max:
My wife is going to have a baby.

Walt Price:
Oh, good, let's bring more people into this overcrowded world.

Ann Black:
You know what you got there? You got a fishhook in your finger. I'm right proud of you.

Walt Price:
Hey, did you see the grosses for Gandhi 2?

Bob Barrenger:
Beats workin'.

Walt Price:
How are we coming with the dead horse scene?

Marty Rossen:
You can't actually kill the horse.

Walt Price:
Aw, f*** me!

Walt Price:
I have no wife!

Walt Price:
Marty, we got a new town. It's uh... Where are we?

Bill Smith:
Waterford, Vermont.

Walt Price:
Waterford, Vermont. Where is it? THAT'S where it is.

Tommy Max:
I'm very sorry, I...

Walt Price:
You're very sorry, you passive-aggressive, son-of-a-b*tch... Can we replace him?

Bill Smith:
We start shooting in three days.

Walt Price:
What's in the bag?

Marty Rossen:
My undies, cause, you can't get this film off on time I'm gonna wet myself.

Tommy Max:
My wife is having a baby...

Walt Price:
Thank you for keeping me current.

Doc Wilson:
Well I'm not sure either, but you don't hear me complain.

Walt Price:
Would you like a cigar?

Mayor George Bailey:
Aren't these illegal?

Walt Price:
Why would they be illegal?

Mayor George Bailey:
Well, the trade embargo with Cuba.

Walt Price:
Nobody tells me anything.

Decorator:
Do you want to see the firemen's costumes? Because i found this mole skin for the color...

Walt Price:
Okay.

Decorator:
It's not black but it looks black. it's not brown...

Walt Price:
Yep, it's faggy without being homosexual.

Doug Mackenzie:
You have a date, they call, you're doing business nine at o'clock at night.

Ann Black:
I wasn't doing business.

Doug Mackenzie:
Oh, well what were you doing then that was so important that you shouldn't call your fianc...

Ann Black:
I... have to tell you that it is all over between us, Doug. I met somebody else, and it's very serious, and it's over.

Doug Mackenzie:
Wait, so serious you couldn't call me and tell you'd be... what?