The 79th Annual Academy Awards

Ellen DeGeneres:
Jennifer Hudson is here from American Idol. America didn't vote for you and yet you're here with an Oscar Nomination. And Al Gore, America did vote for you.

Will Ferrell:
A comedian at the Oscars, the saddest man of all / Your movies may make millions but your name they'll never call.

Steve Carrell:
Sound editing is like sex. It is often done alone, late at night and in a room of electronic gadgets.

Greg Kinnear:
And if you want it done right you'll pay top dollar for a true professional.

Ellen DeGeneres:
Since the Oscars have decided to go green, I've been told to recycle some of my old jokes.

Jack Black:
We may not win tonight / But we shall win the ultimate fight... and I'm not speaking in a metaphor, I mean literally: I am going to FIGHT the nominees!

Will Ferrell:
I like the way you're talkin'. I'm sick of this crap.

Jack Black:
HEY, LEO! You think you can date supermodels and win awards? I'm gonna elbow you in the larynx!

Will Ferrell:
Ryan Gosling... you're all hip and now. Well, I'm gonna break your hip... RIGHT NOW!

Jack Black:
Hey Peter O'Toole... you're all legendary and English. I don't care; I'm gonna beat you down with my NICKELODEON AWARD!

Will Ferrell:
MARK WAHLBERG! WHERE ARE YOU? I won't mess with you. You're actually kinda badass. Once again, I hope we're cool. You are very talented.

Jack Black:
And Helen Mirren? You are just hot. What party are you going to?

Martin Scorsese:
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Rick! Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Please, please. Thank you. Thank you. Could you double-check the envelope? Thank you. I mean, I'm overwhelmed with this honor with the Academy and also the honor of being presented by my old, old friends. We go back thirty-seven years. I'm so moved. I'm so moved. I've got to thank Warner Bros.' Alan Horn and Dan and Jeff, and I've got to thank our producers Brad Grey and Graham King and Mac Brown and my old friend Joe Reidy, we're working for twenty years. And Rick Yorn and John Lesher and Chris Donnelly and Ari Emanuel. And that crazy script by Bill Monahan that got me in all this trouble in the first place. And Andrew Lau's original film from Hong Kong, the wonderful Asian cinema. And Michael Ballhaus on camera and Howard Shore's wonderful score and my old, good friend Thelma Schoonmaker. Ellen Lewis for her casting. And so much of this belongs to the cast, I can't tell you. Jack Nicholson for his courage and his inspiration. Leo DiCaprio, six-and-a-half year's work we've done together; I hope another twelve, another fifteen. Mark Wahlberg, Matt Damon, Alec Baldwin, Ray Winstone and Vera Farmiga and Marty Sheen. I just want to say, too, that so many people over the years have been wishing this for me, strangers, you know. I go walking in the street people say something to me, I go in a doctor's office, I go in a... whatever... elevators, people are saying, "You should win one, you should win one." I go for an x-ray, "You should win one." And I'm saying,"Thank you." An then friends of mine over the years and friends who are here tonight are wishing this for me and my family. I thank you. This is for you. And I want to thank my daughter Cathy, who is here tonight, who worked on the film. And Domenica, my wife Helen, and our little Francesca, who's seven years old, who's watching right now. Francesca, stay up for another ten minutes but then jump up and down and make a lot of noise at the hotel. Okay. I'll see you in the morning. Thank you.

[repeated line, taking envelope out of coat]

Al Gore:
And so, my fellow Americans...

[interrupted by swelling music]

[after seeing the acrobats shapeshift around her behind the curtain]

Ellen DeGeneres:
They're naked!

Himself - Winner:
Best Art Direction: Well, the first one of the night. Just some quick thank you's. We want to thank, first of all, to the Academy for this dream come true. It's an honor for us. Thank you to our crew, they made a wonderful job. To Picturehouse, to all of our producers, they've been tremendously supportive. To Guillermo Navarro for his beautiful light. To Guillermo Del Toro for guiding us through this labyrinth, no? I want to thank my wife and my family for their support. And I want to dedicate this to the memory of my mother and all the filmmakers of my country.

Herself - Co-Winner:
Best Makeup: It's very heavy. Thank you very much to the Academy. Thank you. Thank you very much to Guillermo Del Toro, that is a very special person and very talented. Thank you very much to Picturehouse and Picasso and Tequila Gang.

Himself - Winner:
Best Makeup: Okay, where are you, Guillermo? Thank you very much, Guillermo. This is for you. Thank you very much for this...

Herself - Winner:
Best Animated Short Film: Thank you. First I have to apologize to Tom Hanks because I did bring a list just in case. But I want to thank the Academy for this wonderful award, it's such an honor, and also for continuing to support this animated short category. That really means a lot to us. I want to thank the National Film Board of Canada and all the funders and supporters in Norway for helping us make this film. My producers Marcy Page and Lise Fearnley of Mikrofilm in Norway. I want to thank Liv Ullmann for just her beautiful narration, that was really amazing of her to participate in this. And for everyone else who helped make me this film, I just want to say thank you, thank you, thank you. You know who you are, I know who you are and I know that without you I wouldn't be standing here with this little guy. Thank you very much.

Himself - Winner:
Best Live Action Short Film: Oh my God! I made a comedy musical about Israelis and Palestinians that takes place between two falafel stands in the West Bank. And it's a movie about peace and about hope, and to be able to get this award just goes to show that there are so many other people out there who support that notion and that when it comes to the situation between Israelis and Palastinians, hope is not hopeless. And on another note, I know a lot of people in America are probably watching and asking, "What are the short films?" Well, a lot of them are made by directors who are trying to get noticed, and I think in a lot of ways we represent the little guy because we don't have big studios behind us or big name actors or a lot of times the budgets we need, and it relies on perseverance and stick-to-itiveness and hustle and a dedication and a loyalty from a cast and crew who are doing it for pennies if not for nothing. So I'd be remiss if I were to take this award and not thank my co-writer Kim Ray, my producers Pascal Vaguelsy, Amy Kim, Ashley Jordan, Ravi Malhotra, and my composer Yuval Ron. And last but not least, the two people who never doubted me even when I doubted myself, my mother who's here in the audience, Kathy, and my father Dan, who's watching. I love you. Thank you.

Himself - Winner:
Best Sound Editing: Well, first of all I'd like to thank the Academy, our distinguished director Clint Eastwood, producers Steven Spielberg, Paul Haggis and Rob Lorenz. The incredible support from everyone in the Malpaso family, Warner Bros. and DreamWorks. Support from the United States Marine Corps. To our wives and children for their continued support and understanding. Our exceptional picture and sound editors on "Letters," and the mix team of Gregg Rudloff, John Reitz and Dave Campbell. And finally, thank you to my father and all the brave, honorable men and women in uniform, who in a time of crisis have all made that decision to defend their personal freedom and liberty no matter what the sacrifice. Thank you.

Himself - Winner:
Best Sound Mixing: There's no way I'm going to be able to do this by memory, so... First of all, we congratulate Bill Condon. Thank you so much. You crafted a film that was filled with dazzling performances, unforgettable songs from Henry Krieger, stylish effects from Richard Yawn, electrifying editing from Virginia Katz, and some smokin' sound. In the end you thanked us for helping you make your dream; it's really the other way around. Bob, Willie and I are so honored by this award and we thank all of those who collaborated with us on the mix, and we extend our love and appreciation to those in our family who bring us harmony in our lives.

Himself - Co-Winner:
Best Sound Mixing: I'd like to thank our producing team, our cast and crew. Also my loving wife Jackie for her support. And mom, thank you. God bless you all.

Himself - Co-Winner:
Best Sound Mixing: I'd like to thank Cindy, Jessie, Amy, LG, and the guys in the backroom.

Himself - Winner:
Best Actor in a Supporting Role: I know you're not supposed to read but I'd be totally incoherent if I didn't. It's handwritten, it's short. More than anything I am deeply moved by the open-hearted appreciation our small film has received, which in these fragmented times speaks so openly of the possibility of innocence, growth and connection. Acting for me has always been and always will be a team sport. I cannot work at all unless I feel a spirit of unity around me. So my main sense of gratitude goes to the entire cast and crew and production team of "Little Miss Sunshine" for creating the same sense of joy and trust and community that the film speaks about. I'd like to thank the Academy, Fox Searchlight, my wife Suzanne, my sons Adam, Matthew and Tony for their endless support. My representation: Estelle, Lee, Frank and Melody. And for the great teachers I've had throughout my life, both in and out of the profession. Thank you very much.

Himself - Winner:
Best Animated Feature Film: Oh gosh, I asked my kids, "What should I say?" They said, "Thank all the men for wearing penguin suits." They gave me a lucky coin [and] a lucky penguin. But my real good luck was to work with hundreds and hundreds of amazing people, a wonderful cast, great artists, computer wizards, studios that were passionate, people who cut trailers, dubbed the movie, got it into the theaters. And on their behalf, I thank the Academy for this. Thank you.

Himself - Winner:
Best Adapted Screenplay: Well, valium does work. Anyway, I was going to cut off the beginning of this speech and make it brief, but I'm gonna leave it back in and say the movie that made me wanna be a screenwriter was Robert Bolt's "Lawrence of Arabia." And I don't know what could've happened in the universe to end up at the same Oscars as Peter O'Toole, you know; so it's crazy. He's here, I've seen him. So anyway, thanks to the Academy, to Warner Bros., everybody at Warner Bros. Alan Mak and Felix Chong who wrote "Infernal Affairs." The producers present and not present, the agents, everybody who made "The Departed" such a success. Thanks to Marty and Leo for reading the script and calling each other and saying let's make it. And Thelma. Everyone who worked on "The Departed" was, it's easy to say, on the top of their game before they started, and under Marty's direction it only got higher after that. Thank you very much.

Herself - Winner:
Best Costume Design: Well, I'm very happy to be here but it's also very frightening to be here. So in one way I wanted to get this doll, and another, I was frightened. But thank you very, very much. I want to thank Francis, first of all, for introducing me to Sofia when we were doing "Cotton Club." And she was this [motions to her height as a girl] , and now she's my director. I think she did a wonderful movie; her movie is like a poem and she inspired me. I haven't prepared this speech so I have to hurry up because Marshall, my husband, said I have to get out of here quickly. So I want to thank everybody who had anything to do with this movie. Without them I wouldn't be here, and it's a communal effort, therefore thank everybody very, very much. I want to dedicate this award first of all to Momma, then Hugh Hudson, and Stanley Kubrick, my great master. Without them, I wouldn't be here. Thank you.

Himself - Winner:
Best Cinematography: Thank you, thank you so much to the Academy. This is a great honor. I want to congratulate my fellow nominees. It's a great honor to be among you. This award is a recognition for the collective effort to support the vision of the genius of Guillermo Del Toro. "Pan's Labyrinth" is the result of this narrative that adds up to, in finding the look of the movie and the narrative to continue into this incredible story that unfolds. The creative freedom that was needed to tell the story and to preserve the integrity of the story and the point of view is what was more important for us in this movie. To my children, to my wife for giving me wings. Thank you very much.

Himself - Winner:
Best Visual Effects: You know the naysayers said that four blind kids from the Bronx couldn't make it in visual effects, but here we are. First, I got to thank Jerry Bruckheimer for entrusting us with this great big project. Thanks to Gore Verbinski; your vast imagination, your humor, your tireless work ethic, and that's why we're up here so thank you. Bill Nighy, thanks for being such a wonderful partner in creating this character. Sorry about the deeply embarrassing computer pajamas, but we think it was worth it. And thanks to the crew.

Himself - Co-Winner:
Best Visual Effects: My son, Lex Addison, the pinkie promise worked. Okay, bud. Thanks very much. I love you.

Himself - Winner:
Best Foreign Language Film: Oh my god. I was already crying after Tornatore's film. I thank you Academy members from the bottom of my heart for this honor. And I thank Michael and Tom from Sony Classics for choosing "The Lives of Others" and bringing it to you. I thank Germany and Bavaria for making this film possible. My great department heads for making this film with me. Schwarzenegger for teaching me that the words "I can't" should be stricken from my vocabulary. And my entire crew. I thank my producers, commissioning editors, distributors, financiers. I thank my brother Sebastian for helping with the script and Frau Baumbauer for believing in me. But most of all I thank my actors, especially Ulrich and Sebastian, you're the greatest artists and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Finally, my wife Christiane... No, I have to say that one more thing, just that one more thing. Christiane, I love you.

Herself - Winner:
Best Actress in a Supporting Role & Performer: Original Song Nominees from 'Dreamgirls': Oh my God. I have to just take this moment in. I cannot believe this. Look what God can do. If my grandmother - I didn't think I was going to win but, wow, if my grandmother was here to see me now. She was my biggest inspiration for everything because she was a singer, and she had the passion for it but she never had the chance, and that was the thing that pushed me forward to continue. But I'm so grateful to have my mother here celebrating with me. My boyfriend, my sisters and my brothers back home, and then I've got two of them here, thank you all for being here and supporting me. Also I'd like to thank Bill Condon, our director, who's a genius. Wow. Oh my God. Unbelievable cast. I'd like to thank the Academy. Definitely have to thank God, I guess, again. I can't believe this. Wow, I don't know what to say but I thank you all for helping me keep the faith even when I didn't believe. Thank you and God bless you all. Jennifer Holliday, too!

Himself - Co-Winner:
Best Documentary Short: Thank you, everyone. A treacherous profession, documentary film. One part of our hearts with remote villages in Anhui, China, the other part burning to get here, Beverly Hills. Complicated. Quite complicated. Our thanks to Jing Jun and Li Xiguang, Joan Ganz Cooney, our Chinese-American supporters, the Starr Foundation, Sheila Nevins of HBO, Qu Ke, Chung Ma, the whole China crew. And most importantly, Zhang Ying, who let us film her work.

Herself - Winner:
Best Documentary Short: Special thanks to all the AIDS heroes and friends and supporters of our project. Thank you.

Himself - Winner:
Best Documentary Feature: Wow. I made this movie for my children, and my father taught me to make great movies. My beautiful wife. All of us who made this film, Laurie, Lawrence, Scott and Lesley, we did so because we were moved to act by this man. Jeff Skoll funded it, John Lesher released it so beautifully, but all of us were inspired by his fight for thirty years to tell this truth to all of us. Thank you, Al. We are so inspired. We share this with you.

Himself - Co-Presenter:
'Go Green' Campaign: Thank you. I want to thank Tipper and my family, thank the Academy and everyone on this amazing team. My fellow Americans, people all over the world, we need to solve the climate crisis. It's not a political issue, it's a moral issue. We have everything we need to get started with the possible exception of the will to act. That's a renewable resource. Let's renew it.

Himself - Winner:
Best Original Score: Thank you so much, members of the Academy. In our soul rests, I think, our own true identity beyond languages, countries, races and religions. I'm so proud to work in "Babel," a film that helped us understand better who we are and why and what are we here for. A few thanks: I want to thank John Lesher, Brad Grey, Jon Kilik, Steve Golin, Robert Messinger, Lynn Fainchtein, Anibal Kerpel, my wife Alejandra, my kids Anna, Luna, Don Juan, my mother. The man, my mentor, director and friend, mi amigo, Alejandro Gonz?lez I??rritu. And last but not least, I want to dedicate this to my dad, para vos viejo, para Argentina, and once again, para todos Latinos. Gracias. Thank you.

Himself - Winner:
Best Original Screenplay: Thank you very much. You'll have to forgive me, my voice is really shot. A writer is only as good as the people that he works with, so I have to share this will Bill Weinstein and Tom Strickler who read this script when no one else wanted to read it; with my producers, Albert, Ron, Marc, David, Peter and Jeb, who made this movie when no one else wanted to make it; with Greg Kinnear, Toni Collette, Steve Carell, Paul Dano, Alan Arkin and Abigail Breslin, who collectively saved my life; and especially with Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris, the true authors of this movie, who took words on a page and turned them into a work of art. And finally, when I was a kid my family drove 600 miles in a VW bus with a broken clutch. So, it ended up being the funnest things we did together. So, to my brothers Chan, Dave and Chris, to my mom who's here tonight, and to my dad who's with us in spirit, this is for you. Thank you.

Herself - Winner:
Best Original Song: Wow, that feels as good as you think it does. I have to thank my incredible wife Tammy and our four children, Beckett and Bailey and Johnnie Rose and Miller. And everyone I've ever worked with just thank you, I love you, you know, and all the incredible people that worked on this film and gave so much. But mostly, I have to thank Al Gore for inspiring us, inspiring me; showing that caring about the Earth is not Republican or Democrat, it's not red or blue; we are all green. This is our job. Now we can become the greatest generation, the generation that changed, the generation that woke up and did something and changed. I love you all. Thank you, Academy. This is great. Thank you.

Herself - Winner:
Best Film Editing: Thank you. Thank you so much. This is the third film you've given the Oscar to that was made by Martin Scorsese, and believe me I know I wouldn't be standing here if it wasn't for him. You can understand what it was like to be given a film directed the way he directed this movie, with a wonderful script by Bill Monahan, the fantastic panoply of actors who were just so magnificent. Working with Marty is quite something. It's tumultuous, passionate, funny and it's like being in the best film school in the world. I'm so grateful to you and to my two pillars in the editing room, Scott Brock and Joel Hirsch, and Rob Legato and Ron Ames for putting their arms around us and doing the visual effects and supporting us throughout. And to you, members of the Academy, I feel very honored. Thank you so much.

Herself - Presenter:
Best Adapted Screenplay and Winner: Best Actress in a Leading Role: I've got my purse in one hand, my earring in the other. Thank you, Academy. Thank you so much. Huge honor. You know my sister told me that all kids love to get gold stars and this is the biggest and the best gold star that I have ever had in my life. I want to share my gold star with my fellow nominees, those brilliant, brilliant actresses who gave such amazing performances this year. I also share my gold star with the filmmakers: with Stephen Frears, with Peter Morgan, with Andy Harries, and all the producers and all the filmmakers and the cast. Thank you. Now, you know for fifty years and more Elizabeth Windsor has maintained her dignity, her sense of duty and her hairstyle. She's had her feet planted firmly on the ground, her hat on her head, her handbag on her arm and she's weathered many, many storms. And I salute her courage and her consistency and I thank her, because if it wasn't for her, I most, most certainly would not be here. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you The Queen. Thank you. Thank you very much.

Himself - Winner:
Best Actor in a Leading Role: Thank you. Thank you. Just a second, just a second. Okay. Take it [in] , okay. I wrote something down because I thought if it would happen I would be a little overwhelmed and I am. So, okay. When I was a kid the only way that I saw movies was from the backseat of my family's car at the drive-in, and it wasn't my reality to think I would be acting in movies. So receiving this honor tonight tells me that it's possible, it is possible for a kid from east Texas, raised in South Central L.A., in Carson, who believes in his dreams, commits himself to them with his heart, to touch them and to have them happen. Because when I first started acting, it was because of my desire to connect to everyone, to that thing inside each of us, that light that I believe exists in all of us. Because acting for me is about believing in that connection; and it's a connection so strong, it's a connection so deep that we feel it and through our combined belief we can create a new reality. So I want to thank my fellow believers in "The Last King of Scotland." I want to thank Peter, Jeremy, Andrea, Lisa, Charles, Kevin, James McAvoy, Kerry, Stephen, Fox, DNA, Channel Four. I want to thank the people of Uganda, who helped this film have a spirit. And finally, I want to thank my mom and my dad; I want to thank my wife Keisha, my children, my ancestors who continue to guide my steps, and God, God who believes in us all and who's given me this moment in this lifetime that I will hopefully carry to the end of my lifetime into the next lifetime. Thank you.

Himself - Winner:
Best Picture: Wow. To be standing here where the Queen of England just stood, Idi Amin, is pretty incredible. To be standing here where Martin Scorsese won his Oscar is such a joy, such a joy. Now I have to read something. I want to thank Warner Bros.: amazing guys to work with, Alan Horn, Jeff Robinov, Dan Lin, a huge thanks to Kevin McCormick who takes my fifteen calls a day every day. All the cast and crew that Marty just mentioned. You know, I've been lucky enough to work with this guy four times now and last year I was lucky enough to produce two movies, "The Departed" and "Blood Diamond;" I just want to tell you from the bottom of my heart that, to me, Mr. Leonardo DiCaprio, what amazing performances he does every single time. Every time. I love you, man. I can't really stand here and not thank Jack. To watch Marty direct Jack... we'll talk about that later. I want to thank all my family, all my friends. Bill Monahan, what a great screenplay, what a great screenplay. Rick, you've been there for years, every one. My kids, who're at the back there, Hayley and Sammie, you're awesome. My family and my sister Erica, a lot of patience for me, thank you so much. And I just want to say to everyone that knows me, Colin, my business partner, Denis, who spent every day on set with me - I know I drove you nuts, thank you. And thanks to everyone. Thank you so much.