The Flintstones Meet Rockula and Frankenstone

Fred Flintstone:
[looking over the edge of the balcony] I can't see the bottom with all this mist. Hey Barney, want to jump down and see how far it is?

Fred Flintstone:
[watching the monster bash from above on the second floor] You know, Barney, it's a good thing they're supplying the costumes. I wouldn't know what to wear to a monster bash.

Barney Rubble:
[laughs] In your case, Fred, a monster bash is a come-as-you-are party.

Fred Flintstone:
I'm warning ya, Barn, [points to the first floor] that's a 30 foot drop.

Betty Rubble:
[Fred thinks Wilma went to Betty and Barney's room] No, Fred, Wilma didn't come in here.

Fred Flintstone:
That's funny, she's not in our room.

Barney Rubble:
Well if she's not in your room and she's not in our room, where could she be?

Fred Flintstone:
I don't know, Barn, she's gotta be somewhere in this creepy hotel.

Rockula:
[waking up] Midnight already? How long have I been asleep?

Frankenstone:
Five hundred years, Master.

Rockula:
Five hundred years! Oh boy, did I oversleep, you should've awaken me four hundred years ago.

Fred Flintstone:
[dressed as a chickenasaurous] I can feel it in my bones.

Wilma Flintstone:
[laughing] Which bones, Fred, your drumsticks or your wing bones?

Rockula:
You must be Fred Flintstone!

Fred Flintstone:
Wait a minute pal, I'm not Flintstone, I'm the building inspector, that's all.

Rockula:
You are who?

Fred Flintstone:
The local building inspector.

Rockula:
Why would a building inspector be rolling around inside of a barrel?

Fred Flintstone:
Well you see, I'm also a local barrel inspector.

Rockula:
You inspect buildings and barrels at 3 o' clock in the morning?

Fred Flintstone:
Uh yeah well... moonlighting, that's what I'm doing, moonlighting, I have several jobs.

Rockula:
Ridiculous! Do you take me for a fool? You are Fred Flintstone! Or should we put it this way, you WERE Fred Flintstone.

Fred Flintstone:
I like the first way better.

Fred Flintstone:
Why are those goons chasing us?

Wilma Flintstone:
Because Rockula wants to make me his bride.

Fred Flintstone:
[laughs] He can't marry a woman who's already got a husband.

Wilma Flintstone:
He knows that, that's why he wants to make me a widow.

Fred Flintstone:
Oh well that's a different story... wait a minute! A widow?

Betty Rubble:
Where are we?

Barney Rubble:
Looks like the basement.

Fred Flintstone:
With those weirdoes running around, maybe Wilma came down here to hide.

Wilma Flintstone:
[about the mummy case] It's lucky I hid in here because I discovered something fantastic, look, a secret stairway!

Fred Flintstone:
That could lead us out of here!

Barney Rubble:
Hey, good idea, while Rocky and Franky are down here looking for us, we'll be upstairs making our escape!

Fred Flintstone:
Right, let's go!

Fred Flintstone:
Wilma, Betty, quick move away! You're standing on a trap door!

Wilma and Betty:
[jump off] Huh?

Barney Rubble:
We fell through it before, ZOOM, right down to the secret lab.

Wilma Flintstone:
A trap door leading down to the secret lab? How did you get out?

Fred Flintstone:
We climbed through this big window we saw down there.

Wilma Flintstone:
Uh huh and where did the window lead TO?

Fred Flintstone:
Where does any window lead to? It leads to outside, out to the castle grounds. Uh oh, hold on everybody, I got a plan.

Wilma Flintstone:
I knew you would, Fred.

Fred Flintstone:
Why don't we take the trap door down to the lab and escape from the castle?

[Rockula and Frankenstone, while chasing the Flintstones and Rubbles, stop at some barrels, where their targets are hiding]

Rockula:
We must find them! I will search over there, you stay here and check the barrels.

Frankenstone:
[as Rockula runs off] Yes, master.

Fred Flintstone:
[Imitating Rockula from inside the barrel] Forget about the barrel! Search elsewhere!

Frankenstone:
Yes, master.

[Walks off]

Rockula:
[Repeated line] I am not Silika!

Rockula:
I am sure I heard voices. Those barrels, did you check them out?

Frankenstone:
Uh, no, Master. Master tell me forget barrels.

Rockula:
What? I said no such thing! Look in the barrels! I'll look over there.

[Rockula runs off. Frankenstone picks up a barrel and looks inside it, unaware that Fred is crouching right beside him]

Frankenstone:
Empty! [Places the barrel, unknowingly, on Fred, picks up another and looks inside, accidentally bumping the barrel with Fred away] Empty! [Throws the barrel away]

Wilma Flintstone:
[hears something howling] Sounds like wolves howling out there!

Fred Flintstone:
Impossible, Wilma, the guide book says there are no wolves in Rocksylvania.

Igor:
Those are verevolves.

Fred Flintstone, Barney Rubble, Betty Rubble, Wilma Flintstone:
[imitating his enunciation] Verevolves?

Igor:
Count Rockula has not been seen for 500 years, but nobody knows when he might again come to life.

[Rockula, in bat form, appears in Wilma's bedroom, where Wilma is sleeping]

Rockula:
My beloved bride, it is me, Count Rockula! I have returned!

Wilma Flintstone:
[Half-asleep] Uh? You woke me up. I was having such a nice dream.

Rockula:
Your dream has come true, my darling. After 500 years, I have come back to you.

Wilma Flintstone:
[Sees Rockula and gasps] Why, Mr. Silika!

[Rockula's arms drop in amazement]

Wilma Flintstone:
How dare you come into my room! This is an outrage!

Rockula:
An outrage? But you are my bride. Who is Mr. Silika?

Wilma Flintstone:
Look, a joke is a joke, but this is carrying it too far. You'd better clear out of here fast. My husband will be back any minute.

Rockula:
Your husband? But that's me.

Wilma Flintstone:
I warn you, if he finds you here, there's no telling what he'll do.

Rockula:
I don't know what you're talking about. Come, we will leave together.

[Frankenstone opens the tapestry from behind]

Wilma Flintstone:
Ah! I'm gonna report you to Monty Marble. The producers of "Make a Deal or Don't"! Are they gonna hear about this!

[Rockula carries Wilma out of the room as the tapestry closes]

Gladys:
Ja?

Fred Flintstone:
Hehe, hi there. We're the Flintstones and the Rubbles.

Gladys:
You are who?

Barney Rubble:
I'll handle this, Fred. Uh, Ma'am, we're the Flintshteins and da Roobuls.

[Rockula has kidnapped Wilma and taken her to his lair]

Rockula:
Ah, my secret crypt! Do you not remember this place where we used to meet before you became my bride?

Wilma Flintstone:
Mr. Silika, I don't appreciate this phony act of yours.

Rockula:
You know, my dear, you are beautiful when you are angry.

Wilma Flintstone:
Oh, I don't know about beautiful, but I'm angry alright, Mr. Silika.

Rockula:
Silika! Who is this Mr. Silika?

[Frankenstone knocks on the door]

Rockula:
Come!

[Frankenstone enters]

Wilma Flintstone:
Well, my Goodness! Who are you? I don't recall seeing a tall Frankenstone at the party.

Frankenstone:
She very beautiful!

Wilma Flintstone:
Oh, no, not you too. Look, fellas, I'm flattered. But I'm tired of this corny game, Mr. Silika.

Rockula:
I AM NOT SILIKA! I AM COUNT ROCKULA! SEE!

[Rockula turns into a bat. Wilma screams. Rockula turns back to normal]

Rockula:
There, my dear. Have I convinced you?