The Granny

Namon Ami:
It seems you have a wonderful, loving family.

Granny:
Ha! The last time I felt anything like love from this family it turned out to be gas.

Albert:
I would never tear down this house! I have such fond memories of growing up here.

Junior:
Really dad, like what?

Albert:
Like, uh, well, the time I... well, they've escaped me at the moment.

David:
Where are your parents?

Junior:
Who knows, probably somewhere bumping uglies.

David:
You drive a hard bargain.

Antoinette:
Well, I'm not my father's daughter for nothing.

Granny:
[to her grown child] "You were a load I should've swallowed!"

[Antoinette puts her foot in David's crotch under the dinner table, David looks up in surprise]

Antoinette:
How's your meat?

David:
[chewing food] Um... hard.

Antoinette:
Maybe I should tenderize it for you.

Kelly:
[unaware] Did I overcook?

[the voices of the now-undead Gargoli family taunts Kelly as she enter the kitchen and sees the pot on the stove. Kelly lifts the cover and, in sheer horror, sees the head of David]

David:
Hi, Kelly. Want some soup? Made it myself!

[Kelly slams the cover down, then turns to see an undead Granny]

Granny:
[distorted] With a little help from me! [chuckles] Glad you could join us, sweetheart.

[Granny cackles loudly as Kelly runs into the dining room where we see the mutilated and gruesome undead members of the Gargoli family having a "family dinner"]

Albert:
Kelly, my dear. Nice to see you. Join us, won't you?

Andrea:
She really doesn't have much choice, dose she?

[the undead Granny brings out a covered dining tray]

Granny:
[distorted] Treats for the sweets!

[Granny lifts the cover as we see the head of David; The family cheers and laughs]

David:
Hi, everybody!

Junior:
What is this, prime rib? [take a big bite of his meat] I love it!

Albert:
Mmm! Wonderful soup.

David:
Thank you.

Antoinette:
They say that the family that eats together...

Albert:
...stays together.

[throws a piece of meat at both Tyrus and Granny]

Amy:
You know something? Y'all make me sick!

[Amy blows a raspberry]

Granny:
You little brat! Well, what are you waiting for, you jugheads? Go get her!