The Hills Have Eyes II

Napoleon:
[bursting out of the portable toilet with his pants down, hysterical and screaming] F***!

Amber:
What?

Napoleon:
There's a hand in the shitter!

Missy:
One good thing about being dead: wouldn't have to listen to all your bullshit.

Crank:
[referring to Hansel] You trust that guy?

Amber:
He hid us from them. He didn't give us up.

Napoleon:
We don't have any choice, we have to trust him.

Crank:
Bullshit! God knows where he's taking us.

Delmar:
To be honest with you, I'm not sure God knows anything about this place.

Delmar:
[last words] Crank! Don't freak out. Don't freak out. Don't freak out.

[repeated line]

Hades:
Die!

Sarge:
You against the war, Doonesbury?

Napoleon:
Not all wars, Sarge, I just think the president lies too much.

Sarge:
All presidents lie, a**hole! That's their f***ing job!

Napoleon:
Yes, sir.

Sarge:
No president has told the truth since Truman! And you know what he said?

Napoleon:
No, Sarge.

Sarge:
He said that the buck stops here!

Amber:
Who was that guy?

Napoleon:
Shitman the Barbarian, I have no idea!

[first title card]

Title Card:
Two years ago an American family crossing the desert took a wrong turn and drove deep into a military area known only as Sector 16. By dawn the next day, half the family had been slaughtered.

[last title card]

Title Card:
The disappearance of the National Guard trainees and their sergeant was never explained to their family. Officially they were listed as absent without leave. Sector 16 is still not acknowledged to exist.

Delmar:
I killed somebody once. It was easy. That's why it's so dangerous.

Napoleon:
You heard what Crank said. Dead is never better.

Stump:
[climbing out the truck] Whoa, leg's asleep!

Crank:
Dick's asleep.

Mickey:
Wanna wake it up?

Crank:
Nah, that's your daddy's job.

Sarge:
A stunning display of individual and group stupidity! Seventeen civilians killed and yourselves. I'm in f***ing awe!

Insurgent:
America's mothers suck c*cks!

Crank:
What the f*** did you say?

Insurgent:
Your American mothers suck c*cks!

Crank:
America's number one, b*tch!

Mickey:
Aw, Crank, you're taking all the fun out of the afterlife.

Crank:
Shove the afterlife up your ass.

Sarge:
Are you f***ing kidding me? You are in mountain assault training. There are no port-a-potties in Kandahar. You will take your dumps behind the cactus with the scorpions. Do you understand me?

Napoleon:
What do I use for T.P., sir?

Sarge:
Use your f***ing hand.

Sarge:
Do you like f***ing with me, Napoleon? I think you do. You know what? You're officially in charge of guarding the latrine. Not using it, but guarding it. I want you to stand with one leg and hold your rifle over your f***ing head and make sure that no one steals or molests that port-a-potty, or I will have your Gomer Pyle ass court-martialed immediately.

Stump:
I'm not gonna let you bastards get me. Not me, not today. That is not gonna happen!