The Incredible Shrinking Woman

Pat Kramer:
The Strange, almost stranger than strange. Unbelievable story of, Pat Kramer is the one that must be told. I know because unfortunately, I am Pat Kramer. [rewinds tape recorder, and puts it on play] [Tape Recorder] The strange, almost stranger than strange... [stops tape recorder]

Jeff Kramer:
Hey, Mom!

Pat Kramer:
I'm busy, Jeff!

Jeff Kramer:
Mom, it's an emergency!

Pat Kramer:
Honey, what is it? Jeff, what is it?

Jeff Kramer:
[Jeff and friends taking pictures of Pat, in front of her doll house] Say Cheese! Make believe, there's a birdie there, pose!

Pat Kramer:
Jeff, go to your room right now. And the rest of you, off the furniture! [Slams Door] And what are you grinning at you big creep? [smacks the Stan doll, to the floor] Now, I am really mad.

Beth Kramer:
I'm taking mom, to show and tell.

Jeff Kramer:
You are not! she's comin' with me! she's gonna do A LITTLE BAR OF SOAP, and that's final!

Pat Kramer:
I am mad, I want everybody out of here right now.

Pat Kramer:
Please, won't you help me? You are so much kinder, than the others.

Rob:
Look, I only work here lady.

Pat Kramer:
Don't you know who I am? I'm the shrinking woman, I'm Pat Kramer.

Rob:
You're Pat Kramer's clone, the real Pat Kramer's dead.

Pat Kramer:
Dead?

Rob:
Deader, than a doornail.

Dan Beame:
[surrenders to police, as Pat Kramer returns home] Arrest this man.

Policeman:
But you haven't done anything.

Dan Beame:
[gives a firm look] Trust me.

Beth Kramer:
[flicking a light switch on and off] Look Mom, Disco!

“Back een bowl Edwina!!”