The Little Mermaid

[Scuttle shows Ariel and Flounder a pipe for smoking]

Scuttle:
I haven't seen this in years, this is wonderful. A banded, bulbous snarfblatt.

Ariel and Flounder:
Oh!

Scuttle:
Now, the snarfblatt dates back to prehistorical times when humans used to sit around and stare at each other all day. Got very boring. So they invented this snarfblatt to make fine music. Allow me. [blows it, only to have seaweed and water come out]

Ariel:
[remembering] Music?

Scuttle:
[coughs] It's stuck!

Ariel:
Oh, the concert! Oh my gosh, my father's gonna kill me!

Ursula:
Yes. Hurry home, princess. We wouldn't want to miss old daddy's celebration, huh? Would we? [scoffs] Celebration, indeed. Oh, BAH! In my day, we had fantastical feasts, when I lived in the palace. [eats shrimp] And now, look at me. Wasted away to practically nothing. Banished and exiled and practically starving! While he and his flimsy fish folk celebrate. Well, I'll give 'em something to celebrate soon enough. [to her eels] Flotsam! Jetsam! I want you to keep an extra close watch on this pretty little daughter of his. She may be the key to Triton's undoing.

Triton:
You went up to the surface again, didn't you? Didn't you?!

Ariel:
Nothing happened.

Triton:
[exasperatedly] Ariel, how many times must we go through this? You could've been seen by one of those barbarians. By... By one of those... humans!

Ariel:
Daddy, they're not barbarians!

Triton:
They are dangerous! Do you think I want to see my youngest daughter snared by some fish-eater's hook?!

Ariel:
I'm 16 years old! I'm not a child anymore!

Triton:
Don't you take that tone of voice with me, young lady! As long as you live under my ocean, you'll obey my rules!

Ariel:
But if you would just listen!

Triton:
NOT another word! And I am never, NEVER to hear of you going to the surface again! IS THAT CLEAR?!

(Ariel disappointedly swims away)

Sebastian:
Teenagers. Dey think dey know everything. You give dem an inch, dey swim all over you.

Triton:
Do you think I was too hard on her?

Sebastian:
Definitely not! Why, if Ariel was my daughter, I'd show her who was boss! None o' dis flitting to the surface and other such nonsense. No, sir! I'd keep her under tight control.

Triton:
[smiles] You're absolutely right, Sebastian.

Sebastian:
Of course.

Triton:
Ariel needs constant supervision.

Sebastian:
Constant.

Triton:
Someone to watch over her. To keep her out of trouble.

Sebastian:
All da time.

Triton:
And YOU are just the crab to do it!

Triton:
[confronts Ariel in her grotto] I consider myself a reasonable merman. I set certain rules and I expect those rules to be obeyed.

Ariel:
But Dad, I...!

Triton:
Is it true you rescued a human from drowning?!

Ariel:
Daddy, I had to.

Triton:
Contact between the human world and the mer world is strictly forbidden! Ariel, you know that! Everyone knows that!

Ariel:
He would've died!

Triton:
One less human to worry about.

Ariel:
[angrily] You don't even know him!

Triton:
Know him? I don't have to know him! They're all the same: Spineless, savage, harpooning fish-eaters, incapable of any feeling.

Ariel:
Daddy, I love him! [gasps, as she has accidentally slipped the truth]

Triton:
[shocked] No. Have you lost your senses completely?! He's a human! You're a mermaid!

Ariel:
I don't care!

Triton:
So help me, Ariel, I am going to get through to you. And if this is the only way, so be it!

[He proceeds to destroy most of the grotto with his magic trident]

Ariel:
If I become human, I'll never be with my father or sisters again.

Ursula:
That's right. But you'll have your man. Life's full of tough choices, innit?

Scuttle:
Ariel, I was flying. I was-- Of course I was flying. And I saw the watch-- the witch was watchin' the mirror, and she was singin' with a stolen set of pipes! Do you hear what I'm tellin' you?! The prince is marrying the seawitch in disguise!

Sebastian:
Are you sure about this?

Scuttle:
Have I ever been wrong? I mean, when it's important?!

Flounder:
What are we gonna do?

Ursula:
(in Ariel's mind) Before the sun sets on the 3rd day

Sebastian:
Ariel grab onto that! Flounder get her to that boat as fast as your fins can carry you!

Flounder:
I'll try

Sebastian:
I gotta get to the Sea King He must know about this

Scuttle:
What about me? What do I do?

Sebastian:
You find a way to stall that wedding!

Triton:
She really does love him, doesn't she, Sebastian?

Sebastian:
Well, it's like I always say, your majesty, children got to be free to lead their own life.

Triton:
You always say that?

[Sebastian smiles sheepishly]

Triton:
Then I guess there's just one problem left.

Sebastian:
And what's that, your majesty?

Triton:
How much I'm going to miss her.

[Sebastian stares at him in surprise as Triton uses his magic to turn Ariel into a human]

Cast (voices):
Jodi Benson - Ariel

Cast (voices):
Christopher Daniel Barnes - Prince Eric

Cast (voices):
Samuel E. Wright - Sebastian

Cast (voices):
Pat Carroll - Ursula

Cast (voices):
Buddy Hackett - Scuttle

Cast (voices):
Jason Marin - Flounder

Cast (voices):
Kenneth Mars - King Triton

Cast (voices):
Paddi Edwards - Flotsam and Jetsam

Somewhere under the sea and beyond your imagination is an adventure in fantasy.

Love has no boundaries.

[Scuttle shows Ariel and Flounder a tobacco pipe]

Scuttle:
This, I haven't seen this in years. This is wonderful! A banded, bulbous snarfblatt.

Ariel and Flounder:
Oh!

Scuttle:
Now, the snarfblatt dates back to prehistorical times when humans used to sit around and stare at each other all day. Got very boring. So they invented this snarfblatt to make fine music. Allow me. [blows into it, only to have seaweed and water come out]

Ariel:
Music!

Scuttle:
[coughs] It's stuck!

Ariel:
Oh, the concert! Oh, my gosh! My father's gonna kill me!

Flounder:
The concert was today?!

Scuttle:
[inspects the "snarfblatt" further] Maybe you can make a little planter out of it or somethin'.

Ariel:
[takes it back] I'm sorry! I've gotta go! Thank you, Scuttle!

[she and Flounder swim back home]

Scuttle:
Anytime, sweetie! Anytime.

Scuttle:
Ariel, I was flying. I was-- Of course I was flying. And I saw the watch-- the WITCH was watchin' the mirror, and she was singin' with a stolen set of pipes! DO YOU HEAR WHAT I'M TELLIN' YOU?! THE PRINCE IS MARRYING THE SEAWITCH IN DISGUISE!

Sebastian:
Are you sure about this?

Scuttle:
Have I ever been wrong? I MEAN, WHEN IT'S IMPORTANT?!

ariel

what what is it

scuttle

its a dingle hopper humans use these little babies to straighten there hair up

Look at this trove

Treasures untold

How many wonders can one cavern hold?

Lookin' around here you'd think

Sure, she's got everything

I've got gadgets and gizmos aplenty

I've got whosits and whatsits galore

[opening a box containing wine openers]

You want thingamabobs? I got twenty

But who cares?

No big deal

I want more

I wanna be where the people are

I wanna see

Wanna see 'em dancin'

Walkin' around on those

(Whaddya call 'em?) [playfully grabs Flounder’s fin] Oh, feet.

Flippin' your fins you don't get too far

Legs are required for jumpin', dancin'

Strollin' along down a…

(What's that word again?) Street.

Up where they walk

Up where they run

Up where they stay all day in the sun

Wanderin' free

Wish I could be

Part of that world

What would I give

If I were to live

Out of these waters?

What would I pay

To spend a day

Warm on the sand?

Betcha on land

They understand

Bet they don't reprimand their daughters

Bright young women

Sick o' swimmin'

Ready to stand

[Sebastian has been struggling around and now comes crashing down making a lot of noise.]

Ariel:
Sebastian!?

Sebastian:
Ariel, what, are you mad? How could you - what is all this?

Ariel:
It, err, it's just my - collection.

Sebastian:
Oh. I see. Your collection. Hmm. IF YOUR FATHER KNEW ABOUT THIS PLACE, HE'D—

Flounder:
You're not gonna tell him, are you?

Ariel:
Oh, please, Sebastian, he would never understand.

Sebastian:
Ariel. You're under a lot of pressure down here. Come with me, I'll take you home and get you something warm to drink. [A ship passes by overhead]

Ariel:
Now, what do you suppose…?

Ariel:
[about Eric] He's very handsome, isn't he?

Scuttle:
[looking at Max] I dunno; he looks kinda hairy an' slobb'ry t'me.

Ariel:
[laughs] Not that one! The one playing the snarfblatt!

Ursula:
Now, here's the deal. I will make you a potion that will turn you into a human for three days. Got that? Three days. Now listen, this is important. Before the sun sets on the third day, you've got to get dear old princey to fall in love with you. That is, he's got to kiss you. Not just any kiss. The kiss of true love. If he does kiss you before the sun sets on the third day, you'll remain human... permanently. But if he doesn't, you'll turn back into a mermaid and… you belong to me!

Sebastian:
No, Ariel!

[Flotsam and Jetsam wrap themselves around Sebastian and Flounder, silencing them]

Ursula:
Have we got a deal?

Ariel:
If I become human, I'll never be with my father or sisters again.

Ursula:
That's right! But you'll have your man. Life's full of tough choices, isn't it? Oh! And there is one more thing. We haven’t discussed the subject of payment. You can't get something for nothing, you know.

Ariel:
But I don't have any…

Ursula:
[shuts her mouth with her tentacle] I'm not asking much. Just a token really, a trifle. You'll never even miss it. What I want from you is… [close-up on her mouth] …your voice.

Ariel:
My voice?

Ursula:
You've got it, sweetcakes. No more talking, singing. ZIP.

Ariel:
But without my voice, how can I…?

Ursula:
You'll have your looks! Your pretty face! And never underestimate the importance of body language! HA!

Ursula:
[watching her eels knock Ariel and Eric off the boat in the lagoon, about to kiss] Nice work, boys. That was a close one. Too close. The little tramp! Oh, she's better than I thought. Well, at this rate, he'll be kissing her by sunset for sure! Well, it's time Ursula took matters into her own tentacles! [mixes up a potion that will transform her into Vanessa] Triton's daughter will be mine! And then I'll make him writhe. I'll see him wriggle like a worm on a hook! [laughing as the camera zooms in on her nautilus shell around her neck which fades out into the moon]

Ursula:
[as Ariel turns back into a mermaid] You're too late! [cackles wickedly] YOU'RE TOO LATE! [transforms back into her own self and grabs Ariel; to Eric, smugly] So long, lover boy. [jumps off the boat and dives into the ocean]

Eric:
Ariel!

Ursula:
Poor little princess. It's not you I'm after. I've a much bigger fish to…

Triton:
Ursula, STOP!

Ursula:
Why, King Triton! Ha ha ha - How are you?

Triton:
Let her go!

Ursula:
Not a chance, Triton! She's mine now! We made a deal. [takes out the contract]

Ariel:
Daddy, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to, I didn’t know!

[Triton attempts to destroy the contract with his trident to no avail]

Ursula:
You see? The contract’s legal, binding and completely unbreakable, even for you. Of course, I always was a girl with an eye for a bargain. The daughter of the great sea king is a very precious commodity. But, I might be willing to make an exchange for someone even better.

Grimsby:
Eric! What are you doing?!

Eric:
Grim, I lost her once. I'm not gonna lose her again.

Ursula:
Now, do we have a deal? [Triton reluctantly agrees to take Ariel’s place by signing the contract with his trident] Ha. It’s done then!

[Ariel regains her form as Triton is reduced to a polyp like the rest of the merfolk in Ursula’s lair]

Ariel:
Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh! Have you ever seen anything so wonderful in your entire life?

Ariel:
I've never seen a human this close before. He's very handsome, isn't he?

Ariel:
You... YOU MONSTER!!!

Ariel:
Eric, you've got to get away from here!

Prince Eric:
A girl rescued me. She was singing. She had the most beautiful voice.

Prince Eric:
I'm tellin' you, Grim, she was real. I'm gonna find that girl... and I'm gonna marry her.

Prince Eric:
Grim, I lost her once! I'm not gonna lose her again!

Prince Eric:
No, I won't leave you!

Sebastian:
Teenagers. They think they know everything. You give them an inch, they swim all over you.

Sebastian:
[as Ariel sleeps] You are hopeless, child. You know that? Completely hopeless.

Sebastian:
I tried to stop her, sir. She wouldn't listen. I told her to stay away from humans - they are bad, they are trouble, they—

Sebastian:
There you see her / Sitting there across the way / She don't got a lot to say / But there's something about her / And you don't know why / But you're dyin' to try / You wanna kiss the girl.

Flounder:
You know I can't swim that fast.

Scuttle:
THE PRINCE IS MARRYING THE SEA WITCH IN DISGUISE!

King Triton:
So help me, Ariel, I am going to get through to you! And if this is the only way, so be it!

Ursula:
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. I can't stand it. It's too easy. The child is in love with a human. And not just any human. A prince! [Chuckles] Her daddy will love that. King Triton's headstrong, lovesick girl would make a charming addition to my little garden. [Cackles]

Ursula:
Nice work, boys. That was a close one. Too close. The little tramp! Ah, she's better than I thought. At this rate, he'll be kissing her by sunset for sure! Well, it's time Ursula took matters into her own tentacles! Triton's daughter will be mine, and then I'll make him writhe. I'll see wriggle like a worm on a hook!

Ursula:
Not a chance, Triton! She's mine now!

Ursula:
[last and final words before her death] So much for true love!

Vanessa:
Get away from me, you slimy, little...!

Vanessa:
[violently grabs Scuttle by the throat, shaking him] Oh, why, you little…!

Grimsby:
Eric, if I may say, far better than any dream girl is one of flesh and blood, one warm and caring and right before your eyes.

Chef Louis:
Come out, you little pipsqueak, and FIGHT LIKE A MAN!!!

Carlotta:
Why, Eric, that's the first time I've seen you smile in weeks.

Andrina:
Isn't it obvious, Daddy? Ariel's in love.[Triton: Ariel, in love?!?!']