The Making of 'Jackass: The Movie'

Preston Lacy:
Only a true dork wears three pairs of underwear to keep from getting de-pants by a midget.

[while setting up the movie's "roller disco trucking" segment]

Dimitry Elyashkevich:
Hey Jeff, did you hear that? We can't run the lights and the smoke machine at the same time. There's not enough power.

Bam Margera:
We're doing a goddamn Paramount motion picture, and we can't put on fog and lights at the same time? That's not too much to ask, man. Fog and lights together at once for a major motion picture?

Jeff Tremaine:
We're rolling!

Johnny Knoxville:
Am I gonna get an "action," dickface?

Tony Hawk:
The thing about the fat suit is that it makes you lose weight.

Steve-O:
I think the biggest misconception is that I have a big penis.

Ryan Dunn:
Why am I such a team player?

Spike Jonze:
Will you tell the director he's a son of a b*tch?

Ryan Dunn:
I wanna do something else, because nobody wants to see me and Knoxville knocked out. They wanna see us do it again.

Chris Pontius:
I hated the Pacific Northwest, man. It rains all the time, people don't like to work there. No one wants to live in misery all the time. And then you go there, you go into a bar, and everyone hates you because you're on TV. That's why Kurt Cobain killed himself, because everyone was player-hating on him. If I lived in the Pacific Northwest, I would have killed myself years ago.

Ehren McGhehey:
I think with the movie, it's different from the television show because it's a bigger screen.

Steve-O:
Everything we've set out to do for this whole entire movie has been basically a quest for deep trouble, and we found it a lot.

Steve-O:
Japanese chicks don't like me, dude.

Loomis Fall:
Why do you think that is? It works in America, but why not in Japan? I thought you were world-renowned.

Steve-O:
American chicks don't even like me, dude.

Steve-O:
I was in Japan at this stupid Japanese nightclub, and it was just crazy in there. The only two hot chicks I that I saw, I was boogying down with them, and they turned out to be dudes. There I am trying to buy a freaking dude a drink, and then all of a sudden, man. I don't even remember how I found out, I was so wasted, but geez, if I didn't find out, I was that close to a major intimate encounter with a dude.

Jeff Tremaine:
Steve-O turns into "Crab-O" with just a little dab of water.

Dave England:
I think we're going to attract a large group of just dirty, dirty, creepy old men because I think the word's gonna get out that we have a lot of male nudity in our film.

Jeff Tremaine:
Hey, Rick, go ahead and film if you feel like it! Don't wanna rush you, but if you feel like filming, go ahead.

Rick Kosick:
Aren't you the f***ing director? Say action!

[laying down underneath a huge hunk of metal for the filming of the after-credits scene]

Johnny Knoxville:
I'm not dead, I'm just acting.