The Propeller Guy

Mark:
Anyway, I picked myself up, and I thought to myself, you know, "This is fantastic. Like, I can look like I'm acting, but I can also make it look like I'm getting hurt at the same time."

Interviewer:
[ about the sinking of the Titanic] What can you tell us about the CGI?

Mark:
The what?

Interviewer:
The computer graphics.

Mark:
There were no computer graphics.

Interviewer:
Didn't they use computer graphics to make it appear you fall thirty feet and bounce off a giant propeller, before plummeting another ten stories into the icy water below?

Mark:
No. I did that myself.

Interviewer:
Ya did?

Mark:
Well, I'm a specialist.

[Mark jumps off a table]

Interviewer:
This isn't a comedy.

Mark:
This isn't comedy. I'm a method actor.

Mark:
But it's not just me in that scene. There's like, hundreds of other people, all drowning, and falling, and thrashing around and what not. And I mean each time one of them buggered it up, we had to do it all over again.

Mark:
Yes. Well I am quite macho. Actually I'm considered quite a... quite a sex symbol, if you will, back in my home town.

Mark:
Well, it was sorta funny, you know, because like, it was something I did as a funny bit, like a blooper, sort of an oot-take.

Mark:
[falling off the Titanic] Look at me, I'm flying!

Robert Evans:
One scene I wrote for Space Truckers 2, ah, featured this character being jettisoned from an airlock, and then colliding with a propeller on the back on one of these big space trucks. And uh, when Mark got the script, he came to me and suggested the guy be on fire at first, and then explode when he hit the propeller, um, you know, because he's burning, and he's in space. And to me, as a director, ah, that sort of information is... invaluable.

Mark:
Now when people ask me what I do, I tell them, you know, "I'm an aerial propeller collision specialist."

Mark:
[narrating the credits] Casting agent was done by Craig Battle. It sounds rather like a bit of Scottish history, doesn't it? The Battle of Craig.