The Screwy Truant

Truant officer:
Duh - gee whiz. He hit me with everything but the kitchen sink.

Screwy:
Well, don't want to disappoint you, chum.

Truant officer:
I got you, didn't I? Why ain't you in school?

Screwy:
Don't worry. I've got a plenty good reason.

Screwy:
[In the middle of a scene, a wolf goes by chasing Little Red Riding Hood; Screwy stops him] Wait a minute, pal. You're in the wrong picture, ain't ya, man? [Pulls down main title card] See? The Screwy Truant, featuring Screwy Squirrel.

Wolf:
Hmm. One of them corny B-pictures, eh?

Screwy:
Oh, yeah? Listen, you. If you were my size, I'd bust you right in the nose.

Wolf:
Oh, yeah? [Wolf shrinks down to Screwy's size; Screwy shrinks even smaller and runs away]

[after dispatching the truant officer, Screwy pulls down the end title card]

Screwy:
Well, that's that. Now that dumb truant officer never will know why I wasn't in school.

Truant officer:
Oh, yeah? Go on, tell me. Why wasn't you in school?

Screwy:
Because... [Kisses truant officer] I've got measles!