The Second Civil War

Mel Burgess:
He's closing the borders, people! Thank God for arrogance, lust, and greed or we'd all be doing infomercials.

Mel Burgess:
Where's the White House? Do we still have a White House, or is Tokyo foreclosed on it?

Chief of Staff:
In Florida, only 38 percent are in favor of strong action. Most of them are over the age of 75; statistically, most of them will be dead by the next election.

Governor of Idaho:
Politics is just another form of sex.

Mel Burgess:
Stop with the college debate, will you? We're news, emotions happen outside!

Militia Leader:
Sure, you can use our bedroom. It's down the hall; turn left at the rocket launcher.

Jack Buchan:
This president is going to end up as confused as a goat on Astroturf if we're not careful.

The President:
Since when does a soap opera control the future of the country?...

Vinnie Franko:
Where I come from, guys who own drug stores don't drive around in tanks.

Governor of Idaho:
I'm getting tired of all this moral high ground stuff. I prefer rolling around in the muck; you meet more interesting people there.

Jim Kalla:
I rode the buses back in the 60s to bring people together. Seems pretty unfashonable nowadays.

Kenya Nkomo:
Your wife - she's Jewish, ain't she?

Jim Kalla:
You know, I've forgotten what she is. All I know... is that we met on the back of a bus.

Governor of Idaho:
She's pregnant. I'm gonna be a father. And if it's a boy, we're gonna name it... Juan Pablo Farley!

Godfrey:
I came across another great line. 'The best lack all conviction, while the worst are full of passionate intensity.'

Jim Kalla:
That is a great line.

Godfrey:
The poets. Nobody pays enough attention to them anymore.

Amelia Sims:
F*** reality, this is image.

Mel Burgess:
The country is falling apart. We don't need exclamation marks.

Mel Burgess:
What are you getting unraveled for? We're inside, not outside!

NewsNet Assistant:
You don't get it, do you, Mel? It's all outside now.

Vinnie Franko:
You can't shoot me, we're on national television!

The President:
[after deciding on a deadline that won't interfere with "All My Children"] It was almost half a century ago that another president , Dwight D. Eisenhower, found it necessary to use US troops to enforce the constitutional rights of the US government... If necessary I will do the same. I am therefore declaring a deadline of 67 and a half hours from now...

Alan Manieski:
[In news room] 67 and a... WHAT THE F*** IS THAT?

The President:
...by which time the state of Idaho must comply with the constitutional prerogatives of these United States of America as they were delineated by our founding fathers.

Governor of Idaho:
[At Idaho Capitol Building] What an a**hole.

Jim Kalla:
Those whom the Gods destroy, they first make mad.